Tastes Like Pudding
by Sour Schuyler
Summary: Hi! This fic is... Well, how I got the name of this fic, you don't want to know. This is a collage of Eminem's songs converted into YuGiOh context. PLEASE REVIEW!
1. Sing for the Moment

Ok, so

chorus

_Yugi_

**Joey**

_**Yugi AND Joey**_

**This has deep meaning, so fucking THINK ABOUT IT!**

**These ideas are nightmares for Yugi's parents,  
whose worst fear is a child with dyed hair  
and who likes earrings Like the Heart of the Cards has no bearing,  
it's so scary in a game shop that allows no swearing  
to see him walking around with his headphones blaring,   
alone in his own soul room, cold and he don't care  
He's a problem child, and what bothers him all comes out, **  
_when he talks about, his fuckin' dad passin' out  
cuz he just hates him so bad that he blocks him out.  
If he ever saw him again he'd probably knock him out  
His thoughts are wacked, he's mad so he's talkin' back,  
talkin' black, brainwashed from friendship crap  
He sags his pants, green jackets? what a sap  
his step-father hit him, so he socked him back  
and broke his nose, his house is a broken home.  
There's no control, he just let's his emotions go... _  
  
Chorus  
C'mon! Duel with me now (Duel!)  
Duel for the year (Duel It)  
Duel for the laughter  
Duel for the tear (C'mon!)   
Duel it with me now  
Just for today  
maybe tomorrow  
May these holograms will take you away...  
  
Verse 2  
**Entertainment is changin', intertwinin' with duelists,  
in the land of the collectors, a good deck is a privelege  
fair or unfair, with or without homies, only this deck,  
lonely cuz don't anyone know me  
Yet everybody just feels like they can relate,**  
_I guess words are a mothafucka they can be great  
or they can degrate, or even worse they can teach hate  
It's like these friendss hang on every single statement we make,  
like they worship us plus all the stores ship us holofoils in platinum,  
now how the Fuck did this metamorphosis happen?_  
**From standin' on corners and porches just plain bored**  
**to havin' a fortune, no more kissin' ass**  
_But then these critics lacerate you, enemies try to kill you,  
friends turn on you, wannabes all want a turn at you  
To get they hands on every card you have, _  
**_they want you to lose your mind every time you mad  
So they can try to make you out to look like a loose cannon. _**  
_Any dispute won't hesitate to produce relics  
That's why these prosecutors wanna shadowfy me,_  
**strictly just to get me outta this tournament quickly**  
**But all they posers be listenin' to me religiously,**  
**so I'm signin' fake autographs while thugs threaten me**  
_They're for the Kaiba's little brother but his grudge is against me. _  
**If I'm such a senile dog, this shit doesn't make sense B**  
**_It's all criminal, if my pain is literal,  
and I'm a criminal how the fuck can I raise a little sister?_  
I couldn't. I wouldn't be fit to. You're full of shit too,  
Hey jackass! that was a fist that hit you!  
**  
duel with me  
duel for the year  
duel for the laughter  
duel for tears  
duel with me just for today  
maybe tomorrow  
the these holograms take you away...  
  
Verse 3  
**They say duels can alter moods and talk to you,  
well can it load a gun up for you , and cock it too?**_  
Well if it can, then the next time you whip a dude,  
just tell the judge dat I cheated and then I'll get sued_  
_See what these kids do is hear about us totin' prizes  
and they want to win some cuz they think the money's cool_  
**not knowin' we really just protectin' ourselves,  
we players, of course the shit's affectin' our inner dragons**  
**you ignoramus But belief is reflection of self,  
we just explain it, and then we get our cards in the mail.  
It's fucked up ain't it? How we can come from practically nothing  
to being able to have any fuckin' thing that we wanted**  
**_That's why we play for these kids,  
who don't have a thing except for a dream,  
and a fuckin' sales magazine who post pin-up holofoils on  
they walls all day long, idolize they favorite winners  
and know all they songs Or for anyone who's ever been through  
shit in their lives, till they sit and they cry at night wishin' they'd die  
Till they throw up on a good duel and they sit, and they vibe.  
We're nothin' to you but we're the fuckin' shit in they eyes  
that's why we seize the moment try to freeze it and own it,  
squeeze it and hold it, cuz we consider these minutes golden  
and maybe they'll admit it when we're gone.  
Just let our spirits live on, through our lyrics that  
you hear in our songs and we can... _**  
  
duel with me  
duel for the year  
duel for the laughter  
duel for the tears  
duel with me just for today  
may these holograms take you away...  
  
duel with me  
duel for the year  
duel for the laughter  
duel for the tears  
duel with me just for today  
may these holograms take you away......


	2. Till Hell Freezes Over

Yo yo yo yo yo (this is)  
This is my motherfucking anthem (hip hop)  
To crazy duelists (anthem)  
Cause I'm gonna keep doing dueling crap  
until the day that I die (aight bitch, never!)  
  
Yo I'm into voodoo, tarot cards and ouija boards  
Lighting candles camping out at haunted beach resorts  
I write the dark shit, and rap about perverted violence  
Ghost stories of people murdered on deserted islands  
Dressed in jeans, striped shirts and a fucking jacket plus white socks,  
Holding a knife, with a life full of drama like Tupac's  
Stabbing my body drunk offa blood well I drink lots  
Let it Land in someone's backyard and get chewed up by two rotts  
I got a eye and a ring with pain ebbing like ink blots  
This duel shit got cash coming out the blue like nude cops  
I use to fight Pharaohs, now I got time to hunt sparrows  
So tell jesus I'm gonna quit sinning when his vagina narrows  
  
chorus  
That's why my brain is out of order  
That's probley why my nights are getting colder and my day seems shorter  
But as the world turns and I keep growing older  
I be living this hip hop till hell freezes over  
Bakura till hell freezes over  
I be living this hip hop till hell freezes over  
And as the world turns and i keep growing older  
I be living this hip hop till hell freezes...over  
  
Yo I use to be to heavy in that cruising rap shit crap  
I think i fucked this kid's soul up listing to acid rap  
I go to party's shooting heads of bobbing head to a new song  
And drink blood till I get high and i stare at this kid for too long  
Like this weed is laced aint it, it taste tainted  
Your whole body fainted, I woke up with my face cremated  
Spaced out like sci-fi t.v  
Fuck ICP buy my cd (S.S.: Whoo!)  
cause while I'm screaming while I'm handing out promo holos of deck  
telling kids "yeah lets do drugs" and "bomb! hit the deck"  
Aint no shame in my game I turn the party out  
Making everybody shout for the spirit with potty mouth  
  
chorus  
That's why my brain is out of order  
That's probley why my nights are getting colder and my day seems shorter  
But as the world turns and i keep growing older  
I be living this hip hop till hell freezes over  
Bakura till hell freezes over  
I be living this hip hop till hell freezes over  
And as the world turns and i keep growing older  
I be living this hip hop till hell freezes...over  
  
Uh, uh uh uh uh  
Ah ah ah ah  
Uh uh uh uh  
Ah ah ah ah  
Uh uh uh uh  
Ah ah ah ah


	3. Backstabber

  
  
Roland's voice:  
  
Attention all personel attention all personel  
  
We have an All Points Bulletin out on a man with a nasally voice  
  
I repeat we have an APB on a man with a fuckin' obnoxious voice  
  
He's armed with a rod I repeat he's armed with a rod  
  
Proceed with caution watch your back duelists  
  
He could be coming at Joey Wheeler next  
  
Verse 1:  
  
There's a joker on the loose from the Egyptian ward  
  
His face is up on the light-up board with a reward  
  
He'll stab you with a rod don't be fooled by his charm  
  
He's probably armed with intent to do your mentality harm  
  
Ring the alarm, look for a man with a shitting, grating voice

Check the blimp out, it seems he hates the Pharaoh by choice

He's has a nice smile and laughs at your jokes  
  
Good luck on your mission and guard your backs folks  
  
Chorus:  
  
I make you think you're a best friend then  
  
Why I oughtta  
  
Hit a bitch ruler from the back, I make you think you're a best friend then  
  
Why I oughtta  
  
Stay away from him he ain't no good!  
  
Verse 2:  
  
We got our KaibaCorp tech to keep us all informed  
  
Suited up head to toe in dueling uniforms  
  
Ishizu storms in, we split the aircraft in sectors  
  
Locking down every block and put up deck infectors  
  
Protect us, Pharaoh and be sure that you stand close  
  
Watch each others backs and guard your bedpost  
  
And most of all be advised that he's wise  
  
He could be disguised as one of your very own guys  
  
Chorus:  
  
I make you think you're a best friend then  
  
Why I oughtta  
  
Hit a bitch ruler from the back, I make you think you're a best friend then   
  
Why I oughtta  
  
Stay away from him he ain't no good!   
  
Verse 3:  
  
I'm on a solo mission to find him personally  
  
To settle the score and beat then him mercifully   
  
For what he first did to my friends  
  
It's sure to be the last  
  
Following footprints with a magnifying glass  
  
To drag his lying ass back to his padded pit  
  
I'm mad as hell, on the trail of the camel's fucking spit  
  
I heard a yell the voice sounded familiar  
  
"Give me your partner or I'm gonna kill ya"  
  
Chorus:  
  
I make you think you're a best friend then  
  
Why I oughtta  
  
Hit a bitch ruler from the back, I make you think you're a best friend then  
  
Why I oughtta  
  
Stay away from him he ain't no good!  
  
Verse 4:  
  
I followed the voice that led down into a labyrinth  
  
Sneezing at dust, and swinging at the dark magician  
  
Inside the depths of his soul room  
  
I taste stale dust in my mouth, then the lights in the place went out!  
  
I saw my past flash in front of my eyes  
  
I felt the Flame Swordsman's high scrapin' against my sides  
  
None of my guys knew where the S.R. was I was doomed  
  
Then I remembered the puzzle around my neck, and found your room  
  
Chorus:  
  
I make you think you're a best friend then  
  
Why I oughtta  
  
Hit a bitch ruler from the back, I make you think you're a best friend then  
  
Why I oughtta  
  
Stay away from him he ain't no good!  
  
Verse 5:  
  
Dueling with psyched robber's there was one thing I learned  
  
They're only powerful when they know what you've fucking learned  
  
I yearned for the day that we finally met again  
  
So I can give him a taste of ancient medicine  
  
He shed his pride, then he promised to shut up  
  
I took his butcher knife and jabbed it into him, cut up  
  
Split him at the seam then dragged the fella home  
  
Beating him over the head with the his girlfriend's telephone  
  
Police voice:  
  
Attention all cars, attention all cars  
  
Unit 666 has apprehended the suspect  
  
He's going back to the Egypt, I repeat  
  
He's going back to the tombs, how about that?   
  
Chorus:  
  
I make you think you're a best friend then  
  
Why I oughtta  
  
Hit a bitch ruler from the back, I make you think you're a best friend then  
  
Why I oughtta  
  
Stay away from him he ain't no good!  
  
I make you think you're a best friend then  
  
Why I oughtta  
  
Hit a bitch ruler from the back, I make you think you're a best friend then  
  
Why I oughtta  
  
Stay away from him he ain't no good!  
  
I make you think you're a best friend then  
  
Why I oughtta  
  
Hit a bitch ruler from the back, I make you think you're a best friend then  
  
Why I oughtta  
  
Stay away from Nam' he ain't no good!


	4. Hailie's Song

Sorry!! I accidentally put up the table of contents that I keep for reference up instead. Thanks to Mecha Scorpion for pointing this out. Kudos to you, dude! (throws grenade candy at you)

can't dance  
I feel like dancing  
I wannna fuckin' dance  
Cuz i'm happy  
Yea' i'm happy  
He He  
I got my Pharaoh back  
Yo, check it out  
  
Somedays i sit, starin' out the window  
Watchin' this world pass me by  
Sometimes i think there's nothing to live for  
I almost break down and cry  
Sometimes i think i'm crazy  
I'm crazy, oh so crazy!  
Why am i here? am i just wastin' my voice?  
But when i see my Pharaoh  
suddenly i'm not sad!  
It all makes sense when i look into his fiery eyes (oh no)  
  
Sometimes it feels like the M. scales holder is lookin' me over  
Everyone's leaning on me  
Cos sometimes it feels like the world's almost over  
But then he comes back for me  
  
My Pharaoh keeps learnin' more  
I watch find out with pride  
People make cracks,   
cuz they don't understand me  
They just don't see my real side   
I act like a bitch just don't phase me,  
Inside it drives me crazy!  
My worries could eat me alive  
But when i see my Pharaoh  
suddenly i'm not sad!  
It all makes sense when i look into his fiery eyes  
  
Sometimes it feels like the M. scales holder is lookin' me over  
Everyone's leaning on me  
Cos sometimes it feels like the world's almost over  
But then he comes back for me  
  
Yeah man if i could sing,  
i'd keep singing this song to my Pharaoh  
If i could dance the steps  
i'd blow something as long as my Pharaoh  
To show him how i feel about him,  
how proud i am that i know him  
God, im a daddy, im so glad that her mom didn't abort her  
Now you prob'ly get this picture from my public persona  
That i'm a pistol-packing drug-addict who bags on his momma,  
But i wanna just take this time out to be perfectly honest  
Cos there's a lot of shit i keep bottled that hurts deep inside of my soul,  
And just know that i grow colder the older i grow  
That puzzle on Yug's shoulder gets heavy and harder to hold  
And the load is like the weight of the world  
And i think my voice is breaking  
should i just shut up or try to live up to these expectations?  
  
please listen,  
I love the Yami more than life in itself,  
But i got a midget who's determined to make my life livin' hell  
But i handle it well, given the circumstances i'm dealt  
So many chances, man, it's too bad, coulda had someone else  
But the years that i've wasted is nothing to the tears that ive tasted  
So here's what im facin: 2 many lost friends, 1 years consolation!?  
Fuck!! I've went to S.R. for this guy, i've been at bat for this guy,  
I've taken globes to peoples' buckteeth bent over backwards for this guy (S.S.: This one's true)  
Man, i shoulda seen it comin, whad i get myself in?  
Wouldn't have ripped the applications up if i'da seen they were upchuckin'  
But forget it, it's over, there's no more reason to cry no more  
I got my Pharaoh, Yami the only person that i adore, Yami  
So sayonara try tomorra, nice to know ya  
those cards have travelled back to the arms of their rightful owners  
And suddenly it seems that my shoulder blades have just shifted  
Its like the greatest gift you can get  
The weight has been lifted  
  
Now it don't feel like the M. scales holder is lookin' me over  
Everyone's leaning on me  
Cos My Pharaoh knows that his girlfriend gets a year older  
But then he comes back for me  
  
Woo! (S.S.: This is wear I break down laughing, imagining this.)  
i told you i can't dance  
Oh well, i tried  
Yami, remember when i said  
If you ever need anything, Tea would be right there?  
Guess what, Tea's here.  
And i ain't goin nowhere, soooo  
I love you (kiss)"


	5. Public Service Announcement

It's the Beginning of Battle City, and Roland flickers on the bigass television screens that are all over the place.

"This is ANOTHER public service annoncement brought to you in part by KaibaCorp," he says.

Kaiba is whispering to him.

"Seto Kaiba does not give a FUCK... what Tea says!"

More whispering.

"If you don't like it, you can kidnap his little brother." (Mokuba looks like this: O.O)

Kaiba whispers some more! w00t

"Upon entering this tournament, you have unknowingly just KISSED HIS ASS."

Kaiba whispers again.

"Seto Kaiba is fed up with your shit... and he's going to beat Yami."

Kaiba whispers, "Yeah." (Mokuba is still like this: O.O)

Roland looks at Kaiba. "Uh... anything else?"

Kaiba says, "Yeah... DUEL ME!"


	6. Flyest Material

**Author's Note: The flyest material comes up when you review. If you review every chapter, this system goes a lot faster. Now read about Joey sitting down in front of his master! ;)**

**Intro: (Joey scratches his collar like a dog)  
(Malik)- "Kaiba!"  
(Kaiba)- "that's me"  
(Malik)- "Stupid jackass times three"  
(Kaiba)- "back...with the flyest God card!"  
(Malik)- "K....K....Kaiba!"  
(Kaiba)- "that...that.....that's me"  
(Malik)- "Uh... I hate you?"  
(Mokuba)- "back with the...deranged...brother"  
  
Kaiba:  
Packing the one eye rush you it's a Hitotsu-me Giant  
Malik trades in his tank tops for oversized pajamas  
Words in my right, they pass my left ear  
It's solid decked out with strategems for next year  
Bear this grenade you got stuck like Mai  
Who that cat yelling instead or amending?  
Tough guy, Joey Wheeler your high rise  
Tea acts more like ronald then the fuckin fry guys  
Go on uptown stupid senoritas  
In Taco Bell screaming "vivas gorditas!"  
Bring all your dogs i give em rabies  
They never had a chance I ment send em to the S.R.  
(Eminem: waaah!)  
CEO Seto Kaiba, brain like satan  
Have your beaten butler cooking up bacon  
I'm obituite with that sap that you say  
Slow my strateg' with ya cause mine to pick a fight wit  
  
Malik:  
Makyura's smile is limpin when you call him a heckler  
Drop you 12 thousand life points by half-time and four more on the next turn  
The eight straight strays to a Yugi's hair on the playground  
Ryou lays down on a stretcher (Don't get carried away now!)  
No pun intended, snapped out of your leash  
And leave it un-attended before i whip out this Mythical Beast  
Unless you want it infected with my card Virus any minute  
Cause i can leave your Obelisk out of play if your deck still is with it  
Snap the card down, say it loud and brace yourself!  
You wanted a duel, i got her tied up in a chair and gag  
Tea's getting smacked and grabbed by the hair and dragged  
Like cave-women, while i'm grave diggin' with that spirit so whacked  
  
Kaiba:  
If you an Egyptian God card better lose some  
Holograms flashin' i'ma take the last one  
  
Malik:  
And if you're spitting whack speech on the pedastal  
I'ma kick your ass so hard i'm gonna detach it  
  
Kaiba:  
If you an Egyptian God card better lose some  
Holograms flashin' i'ma take the last one  
  
Malik:  
I'm flabergasted off two potentially-labelled "shadows"  
Threw my sister's father against the wall and didn't know  
  
Malik:  
Yo, "Malik's whack now", how you dig that?  
Couldn't get on my good side with the Pharaoh on good shit  
Get the greater rate with these God cards I be totin'  
Let's go back to Egypt and kiss off on your boat man  
I got a stupid disease from these weak sea's knees  
My punishments leave your whole persona wheeze  
To the point when you stand up on your feet you want to heave  
Let's go back in time and steal back my whole childhood, greed  
The quickening, made a hiss at the crispening  
I'm exercisin', to chuck the Pharaoh off Kaiba's climp  
This thing's the nicest, i keep telling you  
What the hell this guy on the corner been selling you?  
(Kaiba: "here buy this")  
  
Kaiba:  
I'm sendin' Wheeler an invite, at the wrong website  
Mispelling you, break you and put the fear of hell in you  
Escape above you, stuff my brother in a purse  
Disperse like Tea added too many words in a verse  
Malik Ishtar, a sad lonely motherfucker at birth  
Driving off, leaving the murdered father at church  
The first person searching the earth for the Pharaoh's power  
Should've pulled the plug when found out Malik's a coward  
You don't curse and hit with your own words  
Leave me alone bitch! I get on my own nerves  
And if i don't got all three God cards and Blue Eyes to throw up  
Then I'm takin' off my trenchcoat and killin' Mokuba (fuck Mokie!)  
  
Kaiba:  
If you an Egyptian God card better lose some  
Holograms flashin' i'ma take the last one  
  
Malik:  
And if you're spitting whack speech on the pedastal  
I'ma kick your ass so hard i'm gonna detach it  
  
Kaiba:  
If you an Egyptian God card better lose some  
Holograms flashin' i'ma take the last one  
  
Malik:  
And if you're spitting whack speech on the pedastal  
I'ma kick your ass so hard i'm gonna detach it  
  
Kaiba:  
Any disease out there i'm willing to catch it....  
Malik Ishtar.....All praises  
To the High & Mighty  
  
(Now Mokuba's wearing the dog collar and clawing at his hair because of lice):  
(Kaiba)- "Seto Kaiba"  
(Malik)- "jackass prick"  
(Malik)- "Malik Ishtar"  
(Kaiba)- "the new Pharaoh"  
(Malik)- "Seto Kaiba"  
(Kaiba)- "jackass prick"  
(Kaiba)- "Malik Ishtar"  
(Malik)- "the new Pharaoh"  
(Malik)- "Seto Kaiba"  
(Kaiba)- "ja....jack..jackass...pr..pr..ass prick....prick..pri..prick"  
(Kaiba)- "Malik Ishtar"  
(Malik)- "the new Phar...Phar..Phar.Ph..Ph..Future Pharaoh" **


	7. The Real Slim Shady

(Roland's voice)  
May I have your attention please,  
may I have your attention please,  
will the will Mr. Seto Kaiba please come up,  
I repeat will Mr. Seto Kaiba please come up  
.....we kinda have a problem here.........  
  
(Verse 1)  
Ya'll act like you never seen an old person before  
jaws all on the floor  
like Rex and Weevil just burst in the door  
and started gettin' their asses kicked worse than before  
they first were divorced  
throwing him over his dinosaurs (aaaaaaah)  
It's the return of the...  
"awww..wait, no way, you're kidding,  
he didn't just say what I think he did,  
did he?"  
and then Shadi said...  
nothing you idiots, Shadi doesn't exist  
or at lesat I never met 'im!  
feminist women love Yami and then  
chicka chicka chicka Yugi Motou,  
"I'm sick of him, look it him  
walkin around, grabbin his deck just in case  
flippin' to you know who"  
"yeah, but he's got a great coat"  
yeah, I probably got a couple of screws up in my head loose  
but no worse than what's goin on in your Marik and Bakura's bedroom (eheheheh)  
sometimes, I wanna get on TV and just let loose  
but can't, but it's cool for Tristan to hump a rubber goose  
My bum is on your lips, My bum is on your lips  
and if I'm lucky, you might just give it a little kiss  
and that's the message that we deliver to little kids  
and expect them not to know what a woman's clitoris is  
of course they're gonna know what intercourse is**  
**by the time they hit Mokie's age  
they got half of a company, don't they?  
we ain't nothing but mammals  
well, some of us cannibals  
who like to eat meat wild as animals  
but we can wear leather and plether and silk  
then there's no reason that Mai Valentine can only drink milk (eww)  
She got sick from that shit, I had the antidote  
women wave your guns around, sing the chorus make a sound........  
  
(Chorus)  
I need Kaiba, 'cause Malik is schemin'  
plus all you other stinkin duelists are just faker's dreamin'  
so won't the real Mr. Seto Kaiba please come up,  
please come up, please come up  
'Cause I need Kaiba, 'cause Malik is schemin'  
plus all you other stinkin duelists are just faker's dreamin'  
so won't the real Mr. Seto Kaiba please come up,  
please come up, please come up  
  
(Verse 2)  
Yami don't got to cuss in his speeches to set the record  
well I do, so fuck him and fuck you too  
you think I give a damn about a posse  
half of you frat saps can't even stomach me, let alone stand me  
"but bro, what if you changed, wouldn't it be weird"  
why? so you guys can just lie to get me here  
so you can sit me here next to Joey Wheeler?  
his little sister Serendipity or summat better switch me chairs,  
so I can sit next to Duke Devlin and Tristan  
and hear em argue over who's got the larger right to date her  
little brat threw my the eyes in my new tourney  
"Oh please help cute Ryou, just listen to Joey!"  
I should download her audio on MP3  
and show the whole world how you've been censoring home movies (aaaaaah)  
I'm sick of you little girl and boy groups  
all you do is annoy me  
so I have been sent here to destroy you  
and there's a million of us just like me  
who fight like me, who like to play ruthlessly  
who dress like me, walk, talk and act like me  
and just might be the next best thing, but not quite me......  
  
(Chorus)  
I need Kaiba, 'cause Malik is schemin'  
plus all you other stinkin duelists are just faker's dreamin'  
so won't the real Mr. Seto Kaiba please come up,  
please come up, please come up  
'Cause I need Kaiba, 'cause Malik is schemin'  
plus all you other stinkin duelists are just faker's dreamin'  
so won't the real Mr. Seto Kaiba please come up,  
please come up, please come up  
  
(Verse 3)  
I'm like a head trip to listen to  
cause I'm only giving you things  
you won't say about with your friends 'cause they all listen too  
the only difference is I got the balls to say it  
in front of ya'll and I aint gotta be false or sugar coated at all  
I just get on the intercom and spit it  
and whether you like to admit it (riiip)  
I just shitted it better than 90 you rappers out can  
then you wonder how can  
kids buy up these duel disks like valums  
it's funny,cause at the rate he's going when he's 5,019  
He'll be the only person in the nursing home flirting  
like Joey, grabbing nurses asses when I'm storing up my grassesS.S.: In the unaired series of Yuugiou, Joey fell in love with a nurse.  
'cause pot's been good to me ever since coke stopped workin  
and every single person there's this angry bastard child lurkin  
he could be workin at burger king, spittin on your onion rings  
or in the parking lot, circling, screamin I dont give a fuck  
with his windows down and his system up  
so will Mr. Kaiba get his fat ass up  
and put one of those fingers on each hand up  
and be proud to be outta your mind and outta control  
and one more time, loud as you can, how's it go? ...........  
  
(Chorus)  
I need Kaiba, 'cause Malik is schemin'  
plus all you other stinkin duelists are just faker's dreamin'  
so won't the real Mr. Seto Kaiba please come up,  
please come up, please come up  
'Cause I need Kaiba, 'cause Malik is schemin'  
plus all you other stinkin duelists are just faker's dreamin'  
so won't the real Mr. Seto Kaiba please come up,  
please come up, please come up  
  
'cause I need Kaiba, 'cause Malik is schemin'  
plus all you other stinkin duelists are just faker's dreamin'  
so won't the real Mr. Seto Kaiba please come up,  
please come up, please come up  
'Cause I need Kaiba, 'cause Malik is schemin'  
plus all you other stinkin duelists are just faker's dreamin'  
so won't the real Mr. Seto Kaiba please come up,  
please come up, please come up  
  
(Talking)  
haha guess there's a satirist in all of us........  
fuck it, anybody, get over here


	8. The Way I Am

  
  
Whatever..  
Tristan, just let it run  
Hey Yo turn the beat up a little bit  
Hey Yo.. this song is for anyone.. got it  
Just shut up and listen, Hey Yo  
  
I sit back with this pack of cream puffs and this ring  
it's so shiny it's kind of funny that it's a blessing, oops zing  
the most meanest spirit in this realm and below  
And since not long ago I've been cursed with this curse to just curse  
And just blurt this berserk and bizarre sap-crap that works  
And it sells and it helps in itself to relieve  
all this tension dispensin the weighing down on me  
Gettin this stress that's been slicing me recently off of this chest  
and I rest again peacefully (peacefully)..  
but at least have the decency in you  
to leave me alone, when you freaks see me out  
in the streets when I'm sleepin or feedin my tummy S.S.: Yes, that's right, tummy! Cackle.  
to not come and speak to me (speak to me)..  
I don't know you and no,  
i dont owe you an-y-thing  
I'm not Mr. NSync, I'm not what your friends think  
I'm not Mr. Friendly, I can be a prick  
if you tempt me my other is angry (is angry)..  
No patience is in me and if you offend me  
I'm sending Dark Necrofear (Dark Necrofear).. after you  
I don't care who was there and who saw me challenge you  
Go call you a lawyer, file you a lawsuit  
I'll smile in the courtroom and buy you a wardrobe  
I'm tired of arguin'(arguin')  
I don't mean to be mean but that's all I can be is just me  
  
Chorus:  
And I am, whatever you say I am  
If I wasn't, then why would I say I am?  
In the paper, the news everyday I am  
Radio won't even play my jam  
Cause I am, whatever you say I am  
If I wasn't, then why would I say I am?  
In the paper, the news everyday I am  
I don't know, it's just the way I am  
  
Sometimes I just feel like the Spirit, I hate to be bothered  
with all of this nonsense it's constant  
And, "Oh, it's our destiny to be together foretold! -  
- besides, your white hair and pale face are both just so adorable!"  
And all of this controversy circles me  
and it seems like your clique immediately  
points a finger at me (finger at me)..  
So I point one back at 'em, but not the index or pinkie  
or the ring or the thumb, it's the one you put up  
when you don't give a fuck, when you won't just suck up  
with the kissshit they pull, cause they full of sap too  
When a dude's gettin bullied and shoots up his school  
and they blame it on his Spirit (his Spirit).. and not the spir-ETS  
Where are my parents at? And look where it's at  
Domino City, now it's a tragedy  
Now it's so sad to see, an upper class ci-ty  
havin this happenin (this happenin)..  
then attack Ryou Bakura cause I look this way (look this way)..  
But I'm glad cause they feed me the fuel that I need for the fire  
to burn and it's burnin and so my own fighting spirit's has returned  
  
Chorus:  
And I am, whatever you say I am.  
If I wasn't then why would I say I am?  
In the paper, the news, everyday I am.  
Radio won't even play my jam.  
Cause I am, whatever you say I am.  
If I wasn't, then why would I say I am?  
In the paper, the news, everyday I am.  
I don't know, it's just the way I am.  
  
I'm so sick and tired of bein admired  
that I wish that I would just die or get fired  
and dropped from my label and stop with the fables  
I'm not gonna be able to top Malik's tank-tops  
And pigeon-holed into some "Pegasus-fangirl" sensation  
to cop me rotation at KaibaCorp stations  
And I just do not got the patience (got the patience)..  
to deal with these sweet, crooning fangirls who think  
I'm some h00ker who just tries to be cute cause I like virgins  
with an accent, and grab on my ring, so they always keep askin  
the same ditzy questions (fuckin questions)..  
What school did I go to, what hood I grew up in  
The why, the who what when, the where, and the how  
'til I'm grabbin my white hair and I'm tearin it out  
cause they drivin me crazy (drivin me crazy).. I can't take it  
I'm racin, I'm pacin, I stand and I sit  
And I'm thankful for ev-ery fan that I get  
But I can't take a SHIT, in the bathroom  
without someone standin by it  
No I won't date you; no you're pretty, but whatever  
You can call me an asshole but my answer's still never  
  
Chorus:  
Cuz I am, whatever you say I am.  
If I wasn't, then why would I say I am?  
In the paper, the news, everyday I am.  
Radio won't even play my jam.  
Cause I am, whatever you say I am.  
If I wasn't, then why would I say I am?  
In the paper, the news, everyday I am.  
I don't know, it's just the way I am. 


	9. Soap

Soppy romantic music plays in the background.  
  
Tristan looks at a stranger. "Duke Devlin?"  
  
"What do you want from me Tristan?" Duke snaps, annoyed.  
  
"I know it was you all along trying to get good with Serenity!"  
  
"Wait a minute, you hold hold it right there. Me and that woman  
love each other," Duke argues.  
  
"Love? What do you know of love, you flirt?"  
  
"We were destined to be together. I met her because of you...!"  
  
"Are you out to destroy me?" Tristan demands.  
  
Duke :responds as calmly as a robot. "No Tristan. That's not what I want to do."  
  
"I love her! And we're going to be together."  
  
"Never!"


	10. The Kids

Mr. Kaiba (Yugi Motou)  
And everyone should get along..  
Okay children quiet down, quiet down  
Children I'd like to introduce our new substitute teacher for the day  
His name is Mr. Marik  
Children quiet down please  
Weevil don't throw that (SHUT UP!)  
Mr. Marik will be your new substitute  
while Mr. Yami is out with pneumonia (HE'S GOT AIDS!)  
Good luck Mr. Marik  
  
Mr. Marik  
Hi there little boys and girls (FUCK YOU!)  
Today we're gonna to learn how to poison squirrels  
But first, I'd like you to meet my friend Solomon (Huh?)  
Say hi Solomon! ("Hi Solomon") Solomon's 72 and still lives with his grandson  
and he don't got a job, his grandkid Yugi sits at home and sells pot  
but that five-thousand-year old spirit sure watches porn an awful lot  
And Solomon likes to hang out at the local waffle spot  
and wait in the parkin lot for waitresses off the clock  
when it's late and the shop gets dark and fakes like he killed da mob  
Drag 'em in the woods and go straight to the chopping blocks (AHH!)  
And even if they escaped and they got the cops  
his kid's clique would all be so afraid, they would drop the charge  
'til one night Mrs. Mai went off the job  
when she felt someone grab her whole face and said not to talk  
But Mai knew it was Solomon and said knock it off  
But Solomon wouldn't knock it off cause he's crazy and off his rocker  
Crazier than Yami B is off the vodka  
You couldn't even take him to Amane's to get Bob a "Dr."  
He grabbed Mai' by the legs as chopped it off her  
and dropped her off in the lake for her beau to find her  
But ever since the day Mai went off to wander  
they never found her, and Solomon still hangs at the waffle diner  
And that's the story of Solomon and his marijuana,  
and what it might do to you  
So see if the squirrels want any - it's bad for you  
  
Chorus: Mr. Kaiba (Mr. Kaiba)  
  
See children, drugs are bahhhd (c'mon)  
and if you don't believe me, ask ya dahhhd (ask him man)  
and if you don't believe him, ask ya mom (that's right)  
She'll tell you how she does 'em all the time (she will)  
So kids say no to drugs (that's right)  
So you don't act like everyone else does (uh-huh)  
Then there's really nothin else to say (sing along)  
Drugs are just bad, mmm'kay?  
  
Mr. Marik (Joey Wheeler)  
My penis is the size of a peanut, have you seen it?  
FUCK NO you ain't seen it, it's the size of a peanut (Huh?)  
Speakin of peanuts, you know what else is bad for squirrels?  
Ecstasy is the worst drug in the world  
If someone ever offers it to you, don't do it  
Kids two hits'll probably drain all your spinal fluid  
and spinal fluid is final, you won't get it back  
So don't get attached, it'll attack every bone in your back  
Meet Bonz, fifteen years old  
After hangin out with some friends at a frat party, he gets bold  
and decides to try five, when he's bribed by five guys  
and peer pressure will win every time you try to fight it  
Suddenly, he starts to convulse and his pulse goes into hyperdrive  
and his eyes roll back in his skull blblblblblb  
His back starts tah - look like the Burger World's Arches  
He's on Keith's carpet, layin horizontal barfin BLEH  
And everyone in the apartment starts laughin at him  
"Hey Sid, Bones is a loser, look at him!"  
cause they took it too, so they think it's funny  
So they're laughing at basically nothing except maybe wasting his money  
Meanwhile, Bonz' in a coma, the action is over  
and his back and his shoulders hunched up like he's practicin yoga  
And that's the story of Bonz, the ecstasy maniac  
So don't even feed that to squirrels class, cause it's bad for you  
  
Chorus: Mr. Kaiba (Mr. Marik)  
  
See children, drugs are bahhhd (that's right)  
and if you don't believe me, ask ya dahhhd (that's right)  
and if you don't believe him, ask ya mom (you can)  
She'll tell you how she does 'em all the time (she will)  
So kids say no to drugs (smoke crack)  
So you don't act like everyone else does (that's right)  
And there's really nothin else to say (but umm)  
Drugs are just bad, mmm'kay?  
  
Mr. Marik  
And last but not least, one of the most humungous  
problems among young people today, is fungus  
It grows from cow manure, they pick it out, wipe it off,  
bag it up, and you put it right in your mouth and chew it  
Yum yum! Then you start to see some dumb stuff  
And everything slows down when you eat some of 'em..  
And sometimes you see things that aren't there (Like what?)  
Like Cecelia in a G-string with spiked lime green hair  
(Mr. Shady what's a G-string?) It's yarn Tea  
Women stick 'em up their behinds, go out and wear 'em (Huh?)  
And if you swallow too much of the my product, kids--  
Whoops, did I say that? I meant acid! No, fungus!  
Ya tongue gets, all swoll up like a cow's tongue (How come?)  
cause it comes from a cow's dung (Gross!!)  
See drugs are bad, it's a common fact  
But your mom and dad, know that's all that I'm good at (Oh!)  
But don't be me, cause if you grow up and you go and O.D.  
They're gonna come for me and I'ma have to get my brother to play me  
he'll get a disguise and hide, and it'll be my fault  
So don't do drugs, and do exactly as I don't,  
cause I'm bad for you  
  
Chorus: Mr. Kaiba (Mr. Marik)  
  
See children, drugs are bahhhd (uh-huh)  
and if you don't believe me, ask ya dahhhd (put that down)  
and if you don't believe him, ask ya mom (you can ask)  
She'll tell you how she does 'em all the time (and she will)  
So kids say no to drugs (say no)  
So you don't act like everyone else does (like I do)  
And there's really nothin else to say (that's right)  
Drugs are just bad, mmm'kay?  
  
Mr. Kaiba (Yugi Motou)  
Come on children, clap along (SHUT UP!)  
Sing along children (Suck my motherfuckin dick!)  
Drugs are just bad, drugs are just bad (Kazuki is gonna sue me!)  
So don't do drugs (Suck my motherfuckin penis!)  
so there'll be more for me (Hippie! God damnit!)  
(Marik killed Odion! fart Ewww, ahhh!)  
(So, fucked up, right now..)


	11. Criminal

Eminem  
A lot of people ask me.. stupid fuckin questions  
A lot of people think that.. what I say during duels  
or what I talk about on TV, that I actually do in real life  
or that I believe in it  
Or if I say that, If I wanna use the Heart of the Cards, that..  
I'm actually gonna do it  
or that I believe in it  
Well, shit.. if you believe that  
then I'll kill you  
You know why?  
Cuz I'm a  
  
CRIMINAL  
CRIMINAL  
You god damn right  
I'm a CRIMINAL  
Yeah, I'm a CRIMINAL  
  
Eminem  
My words are like a dagger with a jagged edge  
That'll stab you in the head  
whether you're Joe or Mai  
Or Pegasus, Mokie or Kaiba's ex  
Pants or dress - hate Tris'? The answer's "yes"  
Yamiphobic? Nah, you're just Teaphobic  
Starin at my jeans, watchin my genitals bulgin (Ooh!)  
That's my motherfuckin puzzle, you'd better let go of it  
They belong round my cunt neck, you'll never get hold of em  
Hey, it's me, Ryou!  
Whoops, somebody shot me!  
And I was just checkin the mail  
Get it? Checkin the 'male'? (clicks tongue twice)  
How many dueldisks you expectin to sell  
After your second tourney sends you directly to jail?  
C'mon!-- Relax God, I like gay men  
Right, friend? Give me an amen (AAA-men!)  
Please Lord, this boy needs Jesus  
Heal this child, help us destroy these demons  
Oh, and please send me a brand new car  
And a prostitute while Joey's girlfriend's sick in the hospital  
Preacher preacher, fifth grade teacher  
You can't reach me, my mom can't neither  
You can't teach me a goddamn thing cause  
I watch TV, and Comcast cable  
And you ain't able to stop these thoughts  
You can't stop me from toppin these charts  
And you can't stop me from droppin each March  
With a brand new surprise for these duelin' retards  
Duhhh, and to think, it's just little ol' me  
Mr. "Believe!" still won't leave  
  
Chorus: Eminem (repeat 2X)  
  
I'm a CRIMINAL  
Cuz every time I write a rhyme, these people think it's a crime  
to tell em what's on my mind - I guess I'm a CRIMINAL  
but I don't gotta say a word, I just flip em the bird  
and keep goin, I don't take shit from no one  
  
Eminem  
My mother did drugs - hard liquor, cigarettes, and speed  
The baby came out - disfigured, mental disabilties indeed  
It was a seed who would grow up just as crazy as she  
Don't dare make fun of that baby cause that baby was me  
I'm a CRIMINAL - an animal caged who turned crazed  
But how the fuck you sposed to grow up when you weren't raised?  
So as I got older and I got a lot taller  
My dick shrunk smaller, but my balls got larger  
I drink malt liquor to mess you up quicker  
Than you'd wanna mess me up for sayin the word ...  
My morals went thhbbpp when the Mr. Kaiba got oral  
Sex in his fancy office on top of his desk  
Off of his own brother!  
Now don't ignore me, you won't avoid me  
You can't miss me, I'm white, blonde-haired  
And my nose is pointy  
I'm the bad guy who makes fun of people that die  
In plane crashes and laughs  
As long as it ain't happened to him  
Yami Motou, I'm as crazy as Ba  
-kura and Marik combined - kch the maniac's in  
Replacin the doctor cause Pegasus couldn't make it today  
He's a little under the weather, so I'm takin his place  
(Mm-mm-mmm!) Oh, that's Peggy with an AK to his face  
Don't make me rape him too and spray his seed all over the place  
I told you Peg, you should've kept that thang put away  
I guess that'll teach you not to let me play with it, eh?  
I'm a CRIMINAL  
  
Interlude Skit  
BK Aight look (uh huh) just go up in that motherfucker  
get the motherfuckin money and get the fuck up outta there  
Yami Aight  
BK I'll be right here waitin on you  
Yami Aight  
BK Yo Yam  
Yami What?!  
BK Don't kill nobody this time  
Yami Awwright... god damn, fuck...  
(whistling) how you doin'?  
Tea HI, how can I help you?  
Yami Yeah I need to make a withdrawl  
Tea Okay  
Yami Put the fuckin money in the bag bitch  
and I won't kill you!  
Tea What? Oh my god, don't kill me  
Yami I'm not gonna kill you bitch, quit lookin around...  
Tea Don't kill me, i have two friends at home, don't kill me  
Eminem I said I'm not gonna fuckin kill you  
Hurry the fuck up! BOOM Thank you!  
  
Eminem  
Windows tinted on my ride when I drive in it  
So when I rob a bank, run out and just dive in it  
So I'll be disguised in it  
And if anybody identifies the guy in it  
I'll hide for five minutes  
Come back, shoot the eyewitness  
Then fire at the private eye hired to pry in my business  
Die Tea, Tristan, Mokuba and Joey! Hey Joey!  
This puppy's lucky I didn't fuck his ass yet  
If I ever gave a fuck, I'd shave my head  
Tuck my wig in between my the gun and my brain and chuck  
You doggies just ain't brave enough  
To say the stuff I say, so just tape is shut  
Shit, half the shit I say, I just make it up  
To make you mad so kiss my white naked ass  
And if it's not a duelist that I make it as  
I'ma be a fuckin rapist in a Marik Ishtar mask  
  
(Chorus 2X)


	12. Paul

Mokuba is leaving his big brother Seto Kaiba a message on the phone.  
"Bro what's goin on? It's Mokuba.Uhh..  
Pegasus gave me a copy of the new DuelDisk.  
And I just..." Mokuba sighs.  
Fuck it."  
Mokuba hangs up the phone.

S.S.: No, don't worry, we all had a big party where we washed out his mouth with soap.


	13. Who Knew

I never knew I..  
I never knew I..  
Mic check one-two  
I never knew I..  
Who woulda knew?  
I never knew I..  
Who'da known?  
I never knew I..  
Fuck what a story  
I never knew I..  
Motherfucker comes out  
I never knew I..  
and sells a couple of million toys  
I never knew I..  
And these motherfuckers hit the ceiling  
I never knew I..  
  
Eminem  
I don't do cliques, I don't do posses  
I bang up those who hang with Aussies  
I put lives at risk when I drive in these posh seats tires screech  
I put wives at risk with a knives like these (AHHH!!)  
Shit, you probably think I'm searchin your deck now  
I'm in the back room of your game shop, with duct tape stretched out  
Ducked the fuck way down, waitin to straight jump out  
put it over your mouth, and grab you by your punk hair, what now?  
Oh - you want me to watch my mouth, how?  
Take my fuckin eyeballs out, and turn em around?  
Look - I'll close your fuckin' shop down, circle around  
and hit that bitch, so you can't let your motherfuckin' tears out  
(Oh my God! Oh my God!) I'm sorry, there must be a mix-up  
You want me to clean up while Yami gets his dick sucked?  
ewwww Fuck that, take drugs, rape Mai  
Make fun of gay clubs, men like Pegasus  
Get aware, wake up, get a sense of humor  
Quit tryin to censor me, this is for your kid's amusement  
(Mokie!) But don't blame me when lil' Yugi jumps off of the terrace  
You shoulda been watchin him - apparently you ain't parents  
  
Chorus: Eminem  
  
Cause I never knew I, knew I would get this big  
I never knew I, knew I'd effect this kid  
I never knew I'd, get him to slit his wrist  
I never knew I'd, get him to hit this bitch  
I never knew I, knew I would get this big  
I never knew I, knew I'd effect this kid  
I never knew I'd, get him to slit his wrist  
I never knew I'd, get him to hit this bitch  
  
Eminem  
So who's bringin the guns in this country? (Hmm?)  
Ryou couldn't sneak a plastic pellet gun through customs over in London  
And last week, I seen a Schwarzaneggar movie  
where he's shootin all sorts of these motherfuckers with a uzi  
I sees three little hikaris, up in the front row,  
screamin "Go," with their 72-year-old senile friend  
I'm like, "Guidance - ain't they got the same moms and dads  
who got mad when I asked if they liked violence?"  
And told me that my antics taught 'em to swear  
What about the make-up you allow Rebecca daughter to wear?  
(Hmm?) So tell me that Yugi doesn't know any cuss words  
when his bus driver's screamin at him, fuckin him up worse  
("Go sit the fuck down, you little fuckin prick!")  
And fuck was the first word I ever learned  
up in the third grade, flippin my step-dad the bird (Look!)  
So read up, about how I used to get beat up  
peed on, be on free lunch, and bleed at school every 3 months  
My life's like kinda what my life's like (what?)  
Fucked up after I got my ass whipped every night, Ike  
So how much easier would life be  
if 19 million motherfuckers grew to be just like me?  
  
Chorus  
  
Eminem  
I never knew I.. knew I'd..  
have a new house or a new car  
A couple years ago I was more poorer than you are  
I don't got that bad of a mouth, do I?  
Fuck shit ass bitch cunt, shooby-de-doo-wop (what?)  
Skibbedy-be-bop, a-Joey and Bandit Keith  
Sitting in a maple k-i-s-s-i-n-g (HEY!)  
How many retards'll listen to me  
and run up in the school shootin when they're pissed at a  
teach-er, her, him, is it you is it them?  
"Wasn't me, Seto Kaiba said to do it again!"  
Damn! How much damage can you do with a pen?  
Man I'm just as fucked up as you woulda been  
if you woulda been, in my shoes, who woulda thought  
A DuelDisk would be somethin that you woulda bought  
that woulda made you get a gun and shoot at a cop  
I just said it - I ain't know if you'd do it or not  
  
Chorus  
  
Eminem  
How the fuck was I supposed to know?


	14. You Wanna Be Me

  
  
Uhh, oooooooooooooh baby, baby  
Keep it thug, and keep yo' heat, na nah nah nah nah  
  
Yami  
Now slowly, thinkin of all the things that oppose me  
I think of Pharaohs who died and raiders out to dethrone me  
For they crown they head is cut off, bodies is laid  
Dead in the tomb, it's so fuckin pitiful  
First they love you, could be the midget that even live with you (Yug'!!)  
Mad at your powers, now Tea switched, turned miserable  
Cause she wanna dress like Mai, Miho, and Cecelia do  
But Miho's single, Mai's broke and Cecelia's dead too (ha)  
I can do good by myself; went from riches to rags  
From throne rooms to soul rooms to, tiny ass midgets  
Can't keep they hands to theyself no more  
I'm like, Dan Green, you fiend, you just a  
  
Chorus  
Wanna be me, you can't you faggot, you bitch  
You coward, you clown, you just wanna be down  
So you - wanna be me, you bitch, you phony  
You clone me, you wanna be son, I'm the one and only  
But you - wanna be me, you suckers, you weak  
You flunkies, you fake, you couldn't come close on my worst day  
But you - wanna be me, I burn you and learn you a lesson  
Concernin this mic profession, turn your direction  
  
Yami  
You can't be me, not in your wildest fantasy  
It's childish; should I have to resort to friendship?  
Pay me two million dollars, I'll save your sister  
And show you how to piss all over Kaiba's deck  
That's the thing I hate the most, can't even call you a man  
When you gotta call out my name to get you some fans  
No talent, you need direction; you a puppy with a rabid infection  
You unlucky, I'm your fuckin C-section  
Plus I'm the last real Pharaoh alive  
Toast glass, Peggy Sue, the label get high  
Realize, how many classes I gave you  
Perhaps if you think back you'll realize that I made you  
  
Chorus  
  
Yami  
You can't be me, I'm tryin to lead a straight  
Why they tryin to take Yugi? I'm past Niles of every little Mokuba's "fun time"  
Eating, Ryou's eyeballs and, Bakura's heart  
At the player's ball, YuGiOh suits, y'all birds watch  
'Cuz of A real millionaire, shit'll take place  
Evil as Zork's hate-race dollface people  
"This is Shadi son, and I've come from the basement under pure peace  
To represent the incompentent fools, you'll see that my plan  
is not to rape your hikari  
But to bring more to mankind and teach"  
Every duelist reach for your pens and papers  
Lesson one duel with honor; what you made of junior?  
Cause soon you'll be a grown man with a deck in your hand  
And understand, to battle the Yam' not in your plan  
I'm the last real Pharaoh alive, understand that  
And you my offspring, the boss sting  
A bulletproof Porsche things, hard for you to understand that 'cause ya got no brain  
Atem the king, where my bricks, where's the council at?  
Play me a gangster's theme, while you entertain me  
If I ain't cryin laughin, to the lions, throw your ass in  
What the fuck was you idiots thinkin?  
Cards I'll clutch if I get a inklin that you comin for the kingpin  
But I laugh at you cowards, ha ha ha  
Take me out, try try try, but you  
  
Chorus  
  
You can't be me 


	15. Love Me

Obie Trice:  
You won't see me in the hood  
It's cause I'm hiding from Tea, you understood?  
  
Fellers! I'm still dueling, (yeah)  
I'm still hearing about Joey losing,  
I'm still getting chased by "Kai", S.S.: In the manga, Kaiba labels his initials as "Kai" in the high scores of arcade games.  
Only the light's lime and my DuelDisk's strapped  
And my time is none because I'm writing more rap,  
And I ain't here to meet a dead soul in this buisness,  
I'm here to eat, speak, least until Joe feel this, (for sure)  
and I can't let y'all derail me, man,  
I got young Mokie, homie, you gotta let go of Joey  
cause Joey be back, (ain't goin' nowhere man...)  
We got them games going on  
and that jackass braggin on,  
soon as a asshole touch down back from workin',  
It's whateva, put that on the chedda man,  
but in the meantime, it's Dan Green time,  
chase cheese, preach till my voice give out,  
this is it my friends, this what we boast about,  
Now I'm here Tea so shut your motherfuckin preachin mouth,  
And show me love bitch..  
  
Chorus:  
I just wanna love ya for the rest of my life, (I dont love you Tea)  
I wanna hold you in the morning,  
hold you through the night  
  
I just wanna love ya for the rest of my life, (We wanna love alcohol,  
we wanna love guns, we wanna love money)  
I wanna hold you in the morning,  
hold you through the night.. (we don't wanna love Mai an' Miho though)  
  
Eminem:  
There's a certain mystique when I speak,  
that you notice that it's sorta unique,  
cause you know it's me, my poetry's deep,  
and I'm still matic the way I flow to this beat,  
you can't sit still, it's like tryin to smoke crack  
and go to sleep, My DuelDisk's strapped,  
its knowing any minute I could snap,  
I'm the equivalent of what would happen if ancient Egypt had rap,  
I bully these baddies so bad lyrically,  
it ain't even funny, I ain't Tea's honey,  
I just love Mai's money, but she didn't give me enough, bitch!  
for you to beat me, it's cockamamie,  
you just ain't oddly enough to rock with Yami,  
my noodle is ryhmin', my clocks frozen in time yeah,  
I cut heads loose, yeah, the whole kit 'n' kaboodle,  
It's just brutal  
It's no rumor, I'm numero uno, assume it,  
there's no humor in it no more, you know  
I'm rollin with three motherfuckin' Gods in my deck,  
you need a fan of linen to come and tear a new hole in my image!?  
you better love me... bitch  
  
Chorus:  
I just wanna love ya for the rest of my life,  
I wanna hold you in the morning,  
hold you through the night  
  
Obie Trice: and all the bitches say  
  
I just wanna love ya for the rest of my life,  
I wanna hold you in the morning,  
hold you through the night  
  
50 Cent:  
my buzz is crazy in the hood, they holla my name,  
if it ain't about the flow,  
it's about a place that you can trace it's Kame Game,  
if I was you, I'd love me too,  
I roll like a bus, 9-11 porsce same colour as cranberry sauce,  
I ain't gonna front, I thought Tristan Taylor was tha shit,  
then we find out he fucking round with bow wow bitch,  
my puppy's eatin popcorn, right, rewinding the tape,  
now shorty Yugii in the precinct hollerin rape,  
i'm convinced man something really wrong with these hoes,  
I thought Mai V. was hot then she stopped wearin pantehose  
(Ra Damn)  
used to listen to Pegasus and tap my feet,  
then the bitch put out a tournament that didn't have no beats, (uh-huh)  
that boy Marik I. he determined not to fail,  
that Egyptian went butt-ass for his plot devices to sell,  
my back shot to help Joey hit them high notes,  
and Ishizu I taught Seto K more to deepthroat  
  
Chorus:  
I just wanna love ya for the rest of my life,  
I wanna hold you in the morning, (Pegasus luv'a burnish the monies,  
the bunnies, OMG the bunnies!)  
hold you through the night (I just wanna kill you)  
  
I just wanna love ya for the rest of my life, I wanna hold you  
in the morning, (I just wanna yell "I hate you Tea")  
hold you through the night.


	16. Lose Yourself

  
  
Look, if you had one shot or one opportunity  
To seize everything you ever wanted in one moment  
Would you capture it or just let it slip?  
  
Yo, his palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy  
There's vomit on his sweater already, Granmps' spaghetti  
He's nervous, but on the surface he looks calm and ready  
To lower your life points, but he keeps on forgetting  
All your strategies, the whole crowd goes so loud  
He opens his mouth, but the words commands just won't come out  
He's chokin', how everybody's jokin' now  
The clock's run out, time's up, over bl-oww!  
Snap back to reality, Oh! There goes gravity,  
Oh!, there goes Kaiba, he choked  
He's so mad, but he won't give up that easy  
No, he won't have it, he knows his whole enemy's cards  
It don't matter, he's too far  
Behind, knows that, but he's broke  
He's so lost that he knows  
When he goes back to his mobile pyramid, that's when it's  
Back to the labyrinth, yo  
This whole odyssey  
Better go capture this moment and hope it don't pass him  
  
Chorus:  
You better lose yourself in the music, the moment  
You own it, you better never let it go  
You only get one shot, do not miss your chance to blow  
This opportunity comes once in a lifetime, yo  
  
You better lose yourself in the music, the moment  
You own it, you better never let it go  
You only get one shot, do not miss your chance to blow  
This opportunity comes once in a lifetime you better,  
  
His soul's escaping through this puzzle that is chafing  
This world is mine for the taking  
Make me king, as we move toward a new world order  
A normal life is borin', but superstardom's equal to post mortem,  
Words only grows tougher, only grow rougher  
He blows us all over, his foes is all on him,  
Coast to coast shows, he's know as the Nameless Pharaoh  
Lonely souls, Ra only knows  
He's grown farther from Egypt, he's no son  
He goes home and barely recognizes everyone  
But hold your breath 'cause here goes the cold water  
These friends don't want him no mo', he's cold product  
They moved on to the next Yu-Gi-Oh who flows  
He nose dove and won nada  
So the soap opera is told and unfolds  
I suppose it's old partner, but the beat goes on...  
Da da dum da dum da da  
  
Chorus:  
You better lose yourself in the music, the moment  
You own it, you better never let it go (go)  
You only get one shot, do not miss your chance to blow  
This opportunity comes once in a lifetime, you better  
  
You better lose yourself in the music, the moment  
You own it, you better never let it go  
You only get one shot, do not miss your chance to blow  
This opportunity comes once in a lifetime yo, you better  
  
No more shadow games, I'm-a change what you call rage,  
Tear this motherfuckin' dome roof off like 2 dogs caged  
I was playin' in the beginning, the mood all changed  
I been chewed up and spit out and booed off stage  
But I kept duelin' and pre-playing' the next turn  
Best believe somebody's willing to sit down and learn  
All the emptiness inside amplified by the  
Fact that I can't get by with Horus' eye  
and I can't live out a natural type of life without a body  
'Cause man, these tournament prizes don't pay off hate  
And it's not anime, there's no Ogata, these are my dates  
And these duels are so complex and it's getting even weirder  
Tryin to duel and write my speech, plus   
Teeter-totter caught up between bein' a guardian and a world champ  
Baby Johji drama's screamin' on and  
Too much for me to wanna  
Stay in one spot, another day of monotony  
Has gotten me to the point I'm like a snail  
I've got to formulate a plot or end up in the Realm or shot  
Success is my only given option, failure's not  
Yug, I love you, not not that way but this trailer's got to go  
I cannot stay old in Solomon's shop  
So here I go, it's my shot  
Heart of the cards fail me not, this may be the only sliver of a chance I got  
  
Chorus:  
You better lose yourself in the music, the moment  
You own it, you better never let it go  
You only get one shot, do not miss your chance to blow  
This opportunity comes once in a lifetime yo  
  
You better lose yourself in the music, the moment  
You own it, you better never let it go  
You only get one shot, do not miss your chance to blow  
This opportunity comes once in a lifetime you better,  
  
You can do anything you set your mind to, man... like Tea's sayin' 


	17. Ken Kaniff

Call this stupid robber...  
( dial tone )  
Ohh kay then...  
What does that mean?  
Is it gonna explode?  
( Thanks for waiting,  
this is -----  
may i help you? )  
Ohh thank you  
I need to make a collect call  
( What number? )  
Ohhh  
the numbers 62-  
( At the tone, please say your name. )  
( beep )  
Malik Ishtar....from, uh, Kentucky.  
Stupid nosy tech-nawl-ohh-gee  
Ring, ring  
Yo  
Hey there 'Kura.  
Who's this?  
This is Malik Ishtar.  
Who?  
Malik Ishtar from Kentucky, ya stupid bast--.  
From Connecticut?  
Yean you wanna get a...  
I dont know nobody in Connecticut.  
You wanna get a hotel room with me?  
A hotel room?  
Yeah, you want me to lick your ass, Bakura!?!?  
Ha.. Yo, wh, who is this? Tristan?  
Hey, pa ha..  
You want me become one with the shadows and all that? Become one with my ass, ya tomb raider.  
He k k k k, yo shut up you little mortal.  
Oh you think Im lyin huh?  
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha


	18. Under The Influence

I revised this rap just before the upload. Review it, bitch! Review by the hundreds! Or you ain't gonna see another motherfuckin rap from me for a while (I'm a liar)

querh ner ner ner, le le le le, le le, le le, quer ner le  
ner neich ner neh  
translation:  
So you can suck my dick if you don't like my shit  
Cuz I was high when I wrote this so suck my dick  
  
Yami  
Two eyes gauged, till my pupils swell up like the Millennium Eye  
Scary like having to stare at Tea's mid-thigh  
My best friend's a man with a trash can strapped to his back  
So the rats can't chew through his last cigarette pack  
I'm like a mummy at night, fightin with bright lightning  
Frightening with seven little Millennium items I do my own fighting  
I'm like a rat in the maze, lost beyond hope  
So I'm Stingin the hate out of everything I come across in the halls  
I light a candle and place it up on the mantle  
Grab Bakura's knife by the blade and stab you with the handle  
So when you find yourself wrapped up in the blinds hurtin  
(Well Yug it's too late)  
Cuz once you're hung from the drapes, it's "curtains"  
  
Ryou  
I'm an instigator, Scottland Yard penetrator  
They bring Change of Hearts to Dark Necrofiers  
Accused for every theft in all of Egypt's mental wards  
They knew I did it, for carrying my own sword  
My yami'll hit your chest like a double-barreled beretta  
He's a black grenade that'll blow up in your face(WA WA WA WA)  
With a spirit in me, I mess up on purpose then take a break to eat cream puffs  
You'll never hear me say the word "stuff"  
I'm snatchin every penny, it's gotta be that way  
Joey face it, that weed I sold to you? In England I laced it  
You had it, I'll make Bonz get another face-lift  
He's a coward just afraid of rhinoplasty as I strap on rubber gloves  
Chillin on a desert island wasted with no food or the like  
I'm the type that'll eat Fish and Chips, and throw up on the mic  
Don't like this rule, you get socked right on sight  
And even at Battle City when I have a broken arm, we gon' fight  
  
So you can suck my dick if you don't like my shit  
Cos I was high when I wrote this so suck my dick  
Cos I don't give a fuck if you don't like my shit  
Cos I was high when I wrote this so suck my dick  
  
Bandit Keith  
I'm a compulsive liar, set Pegasus on fire  
Slash your tires, find out, that actually they're mine  
Plate's expired, so as soon as I'm hired, I'm fired  
Showing my deck off in a band of duelists wired  
"Hey, is Bandit Keith performing?"  
Bitch, didn't you read the flyer?  
Special invited guest will be Seto Kaiba  
"Aren't you a male gangster?"  
Naw, I'm retired, for hitting Sid in the head with another wanksta... that must be the one you're thinkin bout  
I'm ripped, I'm on an acid trip  
My lackey's in a coma for lettin the record skip  
Lettin the record skip - lettin the record skip (Shit!)  
(reverse revolving of record)  
I'm shoutin' anything when I'm snortin  
It's gonna cost $300 dollars to get my pit bull an  
abortion  
Some fangirl asked for my autograph  
I called her a loser, blow smoke in her face, and laughed  
I drop bombs like I was in Vietnam  
All bitches are hoes, even my stinkin ass mom  
  
Seto  
Isis' flashback, two seats, too deep up in that mind's crevice  
Valium laced with opium, hey mokuba pass that  
In Duelist Kingdom we only hang out with hashrats  
At a Stop The Violence rally  
I blast gats, be it a a dog or a packrat  
Get KaibaCorp-ed, with Marik, and Bakura  
Yo cash that, picket your pockets and wallets  
ASAP, Joe doesn't need a platinum leash  
He needs an operation! Neuter him, man! Joey: (KAIBA!)  
Half love and half hate  
Bring your groupies and your deck, Joe, and get laughed at  
Yami-- smack 'im! rich duelists get highjacked  
And their best cards found chopped up in a trash bag  
  
Marik  
We stranglin the Yugi-tachi to the point they can't yell  
Cuz their crew is full of fags, sweeter than bake sells  
Wreckless, come from behind and snatch your millennium necklace  
Cruisin and causin more trouble than seven items  
I rattle your Adam's Apple until it crackles  
Run right past you, turn around, grab you and stab you  
Get persecuted, cuz I'm a looney I'm diluted  
I got a five-year-old's mind, and it's polluted  
I cock it back then shoot it  
I love snatchin' up duelists, refs, and rare hunters  
Shoot up Domino City, even the toddlers  
Brigades barricade to bring the noise  
While the bullets wrap your bones up like Christmas toys  
If I go to clear it, I'm doing a song with Bakura  
And there's a big Japanese sumo wrestler screamin with a bad accent, "Marik shoots ya"  
I'll leave your face leakin snot  
Run up and smack the Tea while she's preachin whatnot  
Take a swing at that wannabe deacon slipshot  
  
Mai  
I used to tell frats I sold weed and weight  
I was straight until I got caught buyin em shaped  
I'm arrogant, with the intent to snatch your rent  
I got kicked out of summer camp for havin sex in my tent  
With Arthur Hopkins's daughter  
My brains out of order  
I've been a slut since I was swimmin in water  
In cahoots with this sap-preach named Tea Gardner  
We got fired from the 'Corp for tryin' to send you a bomb  
(special delivery)  
I played with the dog's mind for fun  
Say I have breast cancer, get dropped an advancement and run  
Drive by you in the rain while you marry your gun  
Call your house and hang up on you for not helpin me none  
Born normal but you know we party girls gotta have fun  
Got a reputation for havin Valon run up his funds  
Used to be the type of bum that wanted to borrow a One  
Til I met Seto Kaiba, now I'm rollin in dough  
  
So you can suck my dick if you don't like my shit  
Cos I was high when I wrote this so suck my dick  
Cos I don't give a fuck if you don't like my shit  
Cos I was high when I wrote this so suck my dick  
  
Suck my motherfucking dick...  
D12...Dirty motherfucking Dozen...  
Assed you like a snake slut bitch with 30 fucking husbands...  
Yami...Ryou...Bandit Keith...Seto...Marik...Haha, and Mai...


	19. Steve Berman

Joe sees Yami as he walks past his office during coffee break. "Heyyy!"  
Yami replies, "Hey, Joey, what's up?"  
Joey shakes his head, glad to see his old pal again. "Yami Motou. What's goin' on, man, how you doin? Good to see you  
again. What's up?"  
"Joey, could you come here and have a seat, please?"  
"Umm, yeah, what's..."  
"Yugi, please, shut the door."  
"Okay." Yugi shuts the door.  
Joe asks, "So what's up? How's duels looking for the third tournament?"  
"It would be better if you didn't enter at all," Yami warns suddenly.  
"Wh-"  
"Your deck is less than nothing. I can't stand to pretend this is good."  
"Wha-"  
"Do you know what's happening to me out there?"  
"Wh-wha-what's the problem?"  
"Rebecca Hopkins told me to go screw myself!"  
"Who's she...?"  
"Duke Devlin told me to shove this deck up my ass! Do you know  
what it feels like to be told to have a deck shoved up your ass?"  
"But, I-" Joe sputters.  
Yami yells, "I'm gonna lose my title over this. You know why Kaiba's deck  
was so successful? It has lots of dragons and God cards and Saggis. You're playin' with swordsman and Scape Goats."  
Joe tries to put in a word, "I mean-"  
"You can't win with this shit!" Yami shouts.  
Joe tries desperately to talk, "What-"  
"Either get some new cards or you're not eligible!"  
"What, I-"  
"Now get the hell out of the Game Shop!" Yami screams.  
Joe looks at him forlornly. "What am I supposed-"  
"NOW!"  
Joe glares at him. "Alright man, whatever."


	20. Without Me

You must admit, Shady and Shadi are very similar...

In 5... 4... 3... 2... 1...  
  
Obie Trice, Real Name No Gimmicks...  
  
Two Egyptian girls go round the outside,  
round the outside, round the outside.  
  
Two Egyptian girls go round the outside,  
round the outside, round the outside.  
  
Ooooohhhhh!  
Guess who's back. Back again.  
Shadi's back. Tell a friend.  
Guess who's back. Guess who's back.  
Guess who's back. Guess who's back.  
Guess who's back. Guess who's back.  
Guess who's back.(go low)  
  
I've created a monster, 'cause nobody wants to see  
Isis no more. They want Shadi. She's chopped liver.  
Well if you want Shadi, then this is what I'll give ya.  
A little bit of key mixed with your heart tripper.  
Some object that will jumpstart my soul quicker  
Then a shock when I get shocked at the hospital  
By the Dr. when I'm not cooperating.  
When I'm rocking the table while he's operating. (Hey!)  
You waited this long to stop dueling  
Cuz I'm back, I'm holding rags while Joey's drooling  
I know that you got a job Ms. Gardner  
But the Pharaoh's's heart problem is complicated.  
So Battle City won't let me be  
or let me be me so let me see.  
They tried to ban me from DDD A/N: Dungeon Dice Monsters, incase you didn't know.  
But it feels so empty without me.  
So, come on dip, bum on your lips  
Jump back. Jiggle the hip and wiggle the bit.  
And get ready 'cause this shit is about to get heavy.  
I just settled all my lawsuits, " you Yami!"  
  
Now this looks like a job for me  
So everybody just follow me  
Cause we need a little controversy,  
Cause it feels so empty without me.  
  
I said this looks like a job for me  
So everybody just follow me  
Cause we need a little controversy,  
Cause it feels so empty without me.  
  
Little hellions, duelists feeling rebellious,  
Embarrassed, their grandparents still listen to Elvis.  
They start feeling like prison is helpless,  
Till someone comes along on a mission and yells "Bitch!"  
A visionary, vision is scary, could start a revolution,  
Pollutin' the air waves, a rebel.  
So let me just revel and bask,  
In the fact that I got everyone kissing my ass  
And it's a disaster such a catastrophe  
For you to see so damn much of my bald head you ask for me?  
Well I'm back. Na na na na na na na na na na...  
Fix up your bend cards  
Tune in spiritually and then I'm gonna enter  
Into up under your skin like a splinter.  
The center of attention. Back for the winter.  
I'm interesting. The best thing since wrestling.  
Infesting in Yugi's ears and nesting.  
Testing; "Attention Please"  
Feel the tension soon as someone mentions me.  
Here's my 10 cents. My 2 cents is free.  
A nuisance, who sent, you sent for me?  
  
Now this looks like a job for me  
So everybody just follow me  
Cause we need a little controversy,  
Cause it feels so empty without me.  
  
I said this looks like a job for me  
So everybody just follow me  
Cause we need a little controversy,  
Cause it feels so empty without me.  
  
A tisk-it a task-it,  
I go tit for tat with anybody who's talking this that  
Marikku Ishtaru, you can get your ass kicked  
Worse than them little Bonz bastards,  
And Mokie, you can get stomped by Joey,  
You 12 year old boy that mumbling  
You don't know me, you're too old.  
Let go. It's over. Nobody listens to techno!!!  
Now lets go. Just give me the signal,  
I will be there with a whole list full of new helpfuls.  
I've been duped, suspenseful with a pencil  
Ever since Akunadin turned himself into a symbol.  
But sometimes, man, it just seems  
Everybody only wants to discuss me.  
So this must mean I'm disgusting.  
But it's just me. I'm just obscene.  
Though I'm not the first king of controversy,  
I am the worst thing since Elvis Presley.  
To do Black Magic so selfishly  
And use it to get myself wealthy. (Hey!)  
Here's a concept that works:  
20 million other Egyptians emerge,  
But no matter how many fish in the sea  
It'll be so empty without me.  
  
Now this looks like a job for me  
So everybody just follow me  
Cause we need a little controversy,  
Cause it feels so empty without me.  
  
I said this looks like a job for me  
So everybody just follow me  
Cause we need a little controversy,  
Cause it feels so empty without me.  
cumberbun  
Kids!


	21. Nuttin' To Do

Yami: What is it, Bakura?  
Bakura: There's us...  
Yami: Yeah..  
Bakura: Our lights...  
Yami: Riiiiight... you want to banish them again or something?  
Bakura: No, I want to ravish them! A/N: o.o;;;;;;;  
  
Yami, Bakura  
Yami Yo if it wasn't for your, my, team, I'd never get my chance to gleam  
Bakura Ryou If it wasn't for my, your, wrist, I'd have nothin to slit  
If it wasn't for this "doom", I'd have nothin to vroom  
Bakura Well..  
both I'm just messin' with you, cause I got nothin to do  
  
Yami  
I am bored!!!!! Sour Schuyler: Lol.  
I came in the diner with skateboarders, and placed orders  
Ate hors d'oeuvres, and hit the waitress Tea with plate warmers crash sound  
Let you inhale the glock smell, while I'm rippin your wallet off  
And siccin Exodia on your tail (I summon...!!)  
Connin you wit false facts, punch your boyfriend in the face punch sound  
Smashing up his glasses and I turn em to contacts  
I'm on some shook shit, if it's missin I took it (whoops!)  
Tea look at this straightjacket, it's crooked!  
I go to jail and send you to the Shadow Realm from a cell  
Put a tape in that package and have you sent via the mail (PegEx)  
So how do you describe someone, with a decapitated head  
When the rest of his body's still alive RUNNIN?Bakura  
Comin with five cards, waitin to do a drive-by  
So when you see the ouija board (what?) hide from it  
For every hundred Tea's rhymin about birds  
Only about two-thirds'd really set it without words  
Yo you ain't a thug, I can make you throw up  
Pick the fifth up, cock, spit, you would swear it's rainin slugs (what?)  
I'm the hottest bishie in the industry (uh)  
I got every thug on the block that get a wind of me defendin me  
You lack class and respect, get a direct flashback  
The Bad and Evil mad rap, I cover the Bad half  
You know how a thug in this junk'll end up  
Spit a round, lift your chin up, you get hit, ten down and ten up (what?)  
I take it if you run your mouth, then you wanna get sent up  
Heat it up, you be leakin blood and spittin your friend sap up  
Now we rivals, cause of a small name or title  
You stepped, got devoured and left with a flower and bible  
  
Yami, Bakura  
Yami Yo if it wasn't for your, my, team, I'd never get my chance to gleam  
Bakura Ryou If it wasn't for my, your, wrist, I'd have nothin to slit  
If it wasn't for this "doom", I'd have nothin to vroom  
Bakura Well..  
both I'm just messin' with you, cause I got nothin to do  
Yami Yo if it wasn't for your, my, team, I'd never get my chance to gleam  
Bakura Ryou If it wasn't for my, your, wrist, I'd have nothin to slit  
If it wasn't for this "doom", I'd have nothin to vroom  
Bakura Well..  
both I'm just messin' with you, cause I got nothin to do  
  
Yami  
yawns Forget a speec -- my girlfriend's references are so complicated  
It takes six minutes to get applause (yay)  
And by the time you all catch on, I'ma end your career  
And walk away with the whole floor so you have nothin to fall back on!  
I'll throw you off of ten floors .. AHHHHHHH  
Pull a headache outta my head, and put it in yours (take this)  
I'm indoors, waitin for this acid to seep in my skin pores  
To go outdoors and do some in-stores  
This girl wanted to know me, I said, "It oughta happen.  
You swallow blood bitch?" "No, but I brought a napkin"  
Gettin skillz while I'm autographin  
'Kura got Amane laughin tellin' her about when I sent her mother river-raftin  
I'm not a fact, I'ma proven fear  
Mr. Kaiba blocked up my U-haul screamin,  
"Wait, wait, wait.. you ain't movin here!"  
Mokuba Kaiba, c'mere, want a souveneir?  
I've been stuck up as heck, since I was a juvi-neer  
Juvenile? Same difference -- I need some rest  
Cause I ain't slept since I found out Isis and Malik commited incest  
(Oh my God!) Brain implants and they say there's a slim chance  
I won't stay the same cause I traded brains with a a leather pair of pants  
  
Bakura  
Walkin in swamp water with table-top RPGs, out for the blood  
Shove a gun in the mouth of a thug  
To break braces, you say grace and make faces  
I'll display hate and break myself in eight places (what?)  
Take paces, turn around draw in a standoff  
Precise aim, icin my fame, blowin your hand off  
Dancin with the Devil leadin - I won't die, I'm never leavin (what?)  
I pledge allegiance to forever breathin  
Street duelists with lots, what? My deck's bigger (what?)  
Fakest losers with toy guns and cheap triggers  
With a deathwish, thinkin I'm the duelist to mess with  
Let the tech lift, direct chest hit, melt your millennium necklace  
For instance, you just a henchmen, on tough soil (what?)  
A follower never had heart, he just loyal  
Thugs is glass doors, I see through em, put the heat to em  
Be careful you might get what you ask for  
  
Yami, Bakura  
Yami Yo if it wasn't for your, my, team, I'd never get my chance to gleam  
Bakura Ryou If it wasn't for my, your, wrist, I'd have nothin to slit  
If it wasn't for this "doom", I'd have nothin to vroom  
Bakura Well..  
both I'm just messin' with you, cause I got nothin to do  
Yami Yo if it wasn't for your, my, team, I'd never get my chance to gleam  
Bakura Ryou If it wasn't for my, your, wrist, I'd have nothin to slit  
If it wasn't for this "doom", I'd have nothin to vroom  
Bakura Well..  
both I'm just messin' with you, cause I got nothin to do  
  
Bakura See, there's Us, and Them...  
And Us, and Them... 


	22. Fuck Off

Author's Note: This is, without a doubt, the nastiest song I've ever read. The lyrics themselves were found on the internet, and sections of them were already censored out, but I've also taken the liberty of editing out a line or two as well. UU I try, man, I TRY! Yes, I know this still has the F-bomb about nineteen times, f.g.a., but just LOOK at the NAME of this SONG!

A shimmy shimmy go go motha fuckin pop  
Hold on, my little brother's kissin' my ass again  
I'm on top bitch and rock for tricks  
Hella whips and gyps and deck trips for wimps  
I get all the money pussy falls like rain  
Been gettin' laid and paid that's why I never complain  
If I ain't in it for the money I'm in it for Mokie (or is that Bokie? Boswell? Frank? Uhh... what was his name again?)  
It's 2004 yo and you still can't fuck with me  
You don't be fuckin' with the Blue Eyes'  
fuckin' with my B-C up your fuckin' ass like my shoe size  
I got a new vibe, kinda like hypno  
You do what I say and I'll do what I want to  
I'm fuckin' up your city and I'm screwin' up your progam  
fuckin' all your speeches we can fuckin' give a goddamn  
Yami Marik gets down with no assistance  
We won't quit until we're banned from existence  
Persistance pays if that holds true  
Then I'm gonna buy this fuckin' planet before the time I'm through  
I was praised and raised on the thoughts of taking all  
So let me get what I got comin' and faking all  
the rest, I'm shakin' like Tea Gardner when she's scared and shit  
You act like the motherfucker's new at this speech shit  
But I've been true to this shit given' my heart and soul  
Been shinin' like a diamond but gettin' passed as coal  
So fuck Off  
Yeah  
  
With my trench coats flyin' off my ass and shit  
Bowl filled hash pockets stuffed with cash  
I be the puppy trippin' sippin' shots of blood  
'Cause the kids don't listen gettin' Tea's speech floods  
I be the only fuckin' duelist who deserves the winnin's  
The 10 karat Kid with my triggers cockin'  
The K the C the K A-I-B-A and you still don't know me  
--Line cut out due to editing U See! I try!--  
I rock for the power and my little brother  
Don't have no answers so just make your move  
I'm just paid in full and Made in Japan  
I ride in a limo with a power fan  
And I'd die for that towards which I strive  
Strive for perfection this much is true  
We do what we say you say what we do  
Mokuba I couldn't be a liar  
And I really do miss Kisara...  
--Edited because it was when I found the lyrics o.o;-- and my decks rolls solo to America  
I'm a CEO dreamin' off orphans like us  
I roam the country like a Greyhound bus  
Put faith in lust and in God I trust  
I'm not Peter Pan I don't fuck with fairies (Tristan! Ewww... put that away)  
But I bust more rhymes than --This part, I'm CHOOSING to edit o.o;;--  
And Yugi Motou couldn't call my game  
fucked so many hoes I'm in the hall of fame  
And I show no shame from coast to coast  
I don't mean to brag, but I like to boast  
fuck Off  
Yeah right in your mother fuckin' ass bitch  
With that Domino city shit ain't shit swift we're on the same script  
Nothing new since Wheeler jacked off  
Yo Bakura come break these mother fuckers off  
  
(Bakura)  
Yo tell the world to hold their breath they're breathing the wrong air  
This planet belongs to me and I'm this hippy with long hair  
We're two boys who spike punch and light joints  
Hang around drugs loud music and like noise  
Kaiba and Bakura we'll act like we never knew ya  
We hate the world as much as each other  
And I ain't leaving this party tonight  
--WHOA! o.o censored by dictation of me!!! sheez, slim. sure its funny, but lay it light a little, will ya?--  
Rum and Pepsi got your whole perception of me sketchy  
'Cause when I get stage fright people are scared to correct me  
'Cause all I do is duel and laugh  
So when I duel you get a leave off school  
'Cause I'm fuckin' the system up  
So when you see me on your block you better hide your cards  
'Cause you know I'm losin' it when I'm rappin' to rock guitars  
This is for children who break rules  
People that straight fool  
And ever single teenager that hates school  
  
fuck Off


	23. Get You Mad

  
  
Yo.. yo! (Bakura laughs evilly)  
Mic check.. (Can't lose!)  
Testing.. one, two (Bakura laughs evilly again)  
Shoooot.. (Can't lose!) Aw nuts..  
  
My attitude is worse than Malik's was  
I'll battle you over stupid objects and diss people  
who ain't have shit to do with it, like Joey does (Keith's tattoo!)  
You see me standin outside of your buildin; screamin,  
"Ryou is good, (HEY!) but Yami Bakura is for the children!" (WAIT!)  
I look at my life in a new body -- fuck it  
Give me the Eye; I form plots for fame -- fuck what you like  
You're probably see me duel half-hearted; cause I don't like duel anyway  
I'm just tryin to get my dictator career started  
Every place and event.. Been There, Done That  
Shit, Yami stuck me in a pendant when he went  
(Mind cruuuush!) "Come on, let's go!"  
Want a deal? Study these 5 chapters  
Lesson One: Throw relics as hard as you can at former rulers  
Lesson Two: Face em and diss em (whattup with your dog?)  
Don't give em a chance; kidnap em (I want you to come with me)  
and make em come to your basement and play  
(you're gonna fuckin check this out)  
Lesson Three: Get a job at a fast food place; switch poison with fries  
and put it on the Tea's table (here eat it!)  
Lesson Four: 'Know you heard this shit before'  
"Hey let me get your pin number; I'll duel you tomorrow, for sure!"  
Don't act like a fan -- you wanna be king?  
Become friendly with the Pharaoh and get in their ring  
Pull him aside and duel as wack as you can  
Lesson Five: Get a hook-up at Kai's  
Dress up like Yami and have them come see you perform live  
And that's the key, but when you see me on the street; I ain't  
givin you shit bitch - don't even bother askin me for a date (get away from me)  
Toilet water splashes me right in the ass when I'm spittin  
cause I'm always shittin when I'm talking like like Tea G (UNNNGGGGH!)  
You shoulda caught sight of Mai, her boobs are so wide  
everytime she glances up her boobs touch the sky (And it said OWW!)  
Told Tea this shit was all about me-ah ("It's all about me..")  
Gave Joey Wheeler mange, rabies and diarrhea ("You're sick!")  
And all of my best friends, total one, said SEE-YA  
Cause Malik and Isis walked in and caught me watching Princess Mia  
(What? Oh my God!) I splish splash while I'm takin a bath  
Grab a bunch of shampoo bottles, use about half, condition and laugh  
White trash -- fuckin your hikari in the ass ("Oh! Ooh Bakura! Oooh!")  
While you're out trying to find gas for your lawnmower to cut the grass  
  
So if I hurt your self-esteem  
and you get dissed too bad Yo why you diss me?  
You know I just be sayin that to get you mad  
And when I rap about a buncha shit you wished you had A big dick!  
You know I just be sayin that to get you mad  
"I can't listen to that song, that shit's too sad!"  
You know I just be sayin that to get you mad  
"He'll never make it, his wrist is slit too bad!" Nurse! Nurse!  
You know I just be sayin that to get you mad  
  
What a wonderful day; Ryou should go outside and play  
Ain't no need to sit inside the house and hibernate  
Hi Renee! (Oh hi!) I was just about to toss a live grenade  
in your driveway (WHAT?) and drive away ( car peels out )  
Are you afraid of a wound made by someone without age  
I'm sippin from it, rippin your arm like a paper mache  
You talk like you're a dark, but you was never trapped though  
I'm sick enough to beat you to death with a feather pillow  
Tipped over a pile of 'em, "soft weapons" I said, just for a joke and a laugh (Ryou says I can! But I can't go to the zoo... MOOOOO!)  
'Cause I jumped up, choked a giraffe, snapped his neck and broke it in half  
Wagin wars, went on stage and sprayed Yami with Flonase  
And wiped my nose with his page in People Magazine (Here!)  
The demon is here, steamin this year  
I rip my fate's voicebox out, scream in his ear (AHHHHHH!)  
It's not a gimmick bitch, it's an image I live it  
Give a fuck? I don't know what a fuck is to give it  
"Yeah I don't think this guy is well.." I'm high as hell  
But I can't beat you with a live cat because then I'll be there as well  
  
impersonating Isis when she's PMSin  
Shut up not, Shut up now  
Lay your cards on the dresser  
Just your dueling deck by itself  
And bang them shits with a spiked bat  
Cut your neck off and sew your head right back  
And leave you like that  
  
You just triggered the prick who thinks that Joey's in heat  
Who's itchin to leave you disfigured and stiffer than me  
Pharaoh, I was teething with strep throat  
while your mother was breastfeeding  
And gave her the flesh-eating disease  
I'm better than takin a out my DuelDisk and beatin your teams  
instead ah'm walkin through Battle City, bleedin in jeans  
(Am I a Thug or a Drip?) Mah hikari's wakin up the next day in breathin machines  
With the Tauk, flashin back to being shot and repeatin gorier scenes  
did you know Tea smokes? she says that if I live  
I'll be too scared to tell it, like "The Pharaoh's a Fag" joke  
  
So if I hurt your self-esteem and you get dissed too bad  
You know I just be sayin that to get you mad  
And when I rap about a fat bitch that you wished you had  
You know I just be sayin that to get you mad  
"I can't listen to that song, that shit's too sad"  
You know I just be sayin that to get you mad  
"He'll never make it, his wrist is slit too bad"  
You know I just be sayin that to get you mad  
  
I know that makes you real mad, don't it? (uh-huh)  
That's right, Yami Bakura (yup) Yami Ryou, Inc.  
Sprayin wreck (mortal)  
And we don't give a heck (see, Ryou, I didn't!)  
or a damn.. or a fuck.. or a shit  
Ok hikari I ain't innocent 


	24. Hellbound

Roland  
Welcome back, to the Battle City finals – Marik Ishtar vs. Yugi Motou!  
  
Marik  
Yo.. Pharaoh!  
Yo.. I'll fuckin.. I'll..  
I'll puke, eat it, and freak you (eww)  
Battle? I'm too weeded to speak to  
The only key that I see to defeat you  
would be for me to remove my Winged Dragon and beat you  
and force feed you, give your tongue a paper cut and sleep with your slut  
I'll knock away your life points, you stupid "great house"!  
you'll think I pulled the arena out from underneath you  
(You lose!) I ain't no animal, I'm a cannibal  
I ain't tryin to shoot you,  
I'm tryin to chop you into pieces and eat you  
Wrap you in rope and plastic, stab you with broken glass  
and have you with open gashes strapped to a soakin mattress  
Dungeons and Dragons, ancient magic, pieces and daggers (ahhh!)  
Fuck the Pharaoh's brat, until his brain's working slower than molasses  
I'm so bananas I'm showin up to your open casket  
to fill it full of explosive gasses  
and close it back with a lit match in it  
while I sit back with Bakura and we hope it catches  
Blow your puzzle to fragments  
Laugh, roll you over and spit on your eyelashes  
  
Chorus: Yami (repeat 2X)  
  
I see the light at the end  
But every time I take a step, it gets dim  
Tell me is this Shadow Realm we're livin in?  
If so, heaven's got to be better  
But if we're hellbound, whatever, let's go down  
  
Yami  
Am I the worst? Because I, never went church (Christ wasn't born yet)  
I saw a bright light and decided to bring along some jerks  
I'ma duel 'til Yugi's body rots, he'll see the doc  
Leave the E.R., then hit a bar for a liquor shot, 'til the liver spot  
One day we all gon' die no use in trying fighting  
But when I die, I'ma be so high and mighty  
that I'ma get up and walk, leavin this Millennium, there!  
with the ashen outline of my aibou still there  
I spit speeches 'til I choke and I play games a lot  
I got a pyramid on my chain but it's still just a rock  
Now if I pray everynight to the Heart of the Cards (guide me Phyllis!!)  
Do I still have to hold my deck very tight?  
You feel me God? I done did so much good stuff while on Earth  
I spoke, I helped, I got Grandpa health & dental, and to make matters worse for 'em  
I bust my duel first, and then I chat with your corpse-like form  
Since way back, I was the one to talk back  
See me at the pearly gates in line, wearin my Millennium Puzzle  
A cartouche on my forehead, God done lost faith  
Angels greet me but I don't reply back  
Just show me to my quarters, and oh yeah, where's Amane at?  
  
Chorus 1/2  
  
Roland  
Bakura was seriously wounded but the soul still burns  
Final battle, fight!  
  
Marik  
Analyze the strength of my game, like Bonz did  
Called upon lost souls, but was choked on acid  
And of course, yo, y'all know I'm no stranger to danger  
Like Joey getting fleas and mange, er, feel a whole range of my anger  
I stretchy my eyes so wide I can see sound  
And beat down these dueling grounds clowns while the Pharaoh's girl frowns  
My rod 'bout as sharp as a dagger, walk with a swagger  
Tie your girlfriend to the back of a black truck and I drag her  
Ten blocks, untie your queen and I still bag her  
Give her some mace to the face and then say that I had her  
My shit go as deep and as dark as a train tunnel  
My flows spill like usin the wrong end of a funnel  
Everyday I don't grow older, but my hikari gets colder  
Fly Odion to Colorado, roll him over with a Boulder  
I know he wants to retaliate but he won't dare  
Cause he messed with you he wet his pants Isis' worst fear  
  
Chorus  
  
Yami  
But every time I make my move, it gets dim..  
Tell me is this the Shadow Realm we're livin in?  
Oh no..  
  
Roland  
Time's up!  
And the winner is...!?


	25. Just Don't Give A Fuck

Whoah!  
A get your hands in the air, and get to clappin 'em  
and like, back and forth because ah  
I am.. what you thought I wasn't  
I've been.. the defeatin' duelists by the dozen  
I be the M-A-L-I... um, Odion, how do you spell "king?" coughing in background  
And check out my yami he goes by the name of er...  
  
Verse One: Marik  
  
Marik Ishtar, brain dead like a rock star  
I'm a M80, Yugi's Lil' like that Becky lady  
I'm gritty, Battle City, naughty rotten rhymer  
Cursin at you goodie-goodies worse than Seto Kaiba  
Yugi's wacker than the Pharaoh he bit his style from  
He ain't gonna sell two copies if he presses a double album  
Admit it, eff it, while we comin out in the open  
I'm going up in smokes and making jokes then  
My name is Marik Ishtar, My bro's an alcoholic (Hi Marik)  
I have a disease and they don't know what to call it  
Better hide your wallet cause I'm comin up quick to strip your cash  
Bought a ticket to your concert just to come and whip your a  
Bitch, I'm comin out swingin, so fast it'll make your eyes spin  
You gettin knocked out like Mai did  
The proof is in the puddin, just ask the Pharaoh then  
I'll slit your pixellated throat worse than Vincent Goldman  
  
Chorus:  
  
So when you see me on your block with two glocks  
Screamin Fuck the World like Tupac (mah hero)  
I just don't give a fuuuuuck!!  
Talkin that shit behind my back, dirty mackin  
tellin your boys that I'm on crack  
I just don't give a fuuuuuck!!  
So put my tape back on the rack  
Go run and tell your friends my shit is wack  
I just don't give a fuuuuuck!!  
But see me on the street and duck  
Cause you gon' get stuck, stoned, and snuffed  
Cause I just don't give a fuuuuuck!!  
  
Verse Two: Marik  
  
I'm Nicer than Kaiba, but I'm on a search to crush the Pharaoh  
I'm Everlast-ing, I like in the shadows and don't grow old  
I'm crazy enough to just straight up diss you for no reason  
I'm colder than snow season when it's twenty below freezin  
Flavor with no seasonin, this is the sneak preview  
I'll diss your magazine and still won't get a weak review  
I'll make your freak leave you, wrap you up in crystals  
This is a lyrical combat, gentlemen hold your pistols  
But I form like Cubix and blast you with my shoulder missiles  
Marik Ishtar, Malik was the hikari's name (Bye-bye!)  
Hearing your sap speeches and then retortin'  
Pathological liar, blowin stuff out of proportion  
The looniest, zaniest, spontaneous, sporadic  
Impulsive thinker, compulsive drinker (i like ice cubes), addict  
Half animal, half man  
Dumpin your dead body inside of a stinky trash can  
With more holes than an Duke Devlin  
  
Chorus  
  
Verse Three: Marik  
  
Somebody let me out this boredom scheme (hey, let me out!)  
I'm a caged demon, on stage screamin like Rage Against the Machine  
I'm convinced I'm a fiend, shootin up while this record is spinnin  
Clinically brain dead, I don't need a second opinion  
Whatever droppin the jaw, I'm flippin the sacred treasure  
I'll bite your oh-so-heroice style, just to make it fresher  
I can't take the pressure, I'm sick of hitches  
Sick of duelin' naggin rulers while I'm washin mental dishes  
In school I never said much, too busy havin a headrush  
Doin too much rush had my face flushed like red blush  
Then I went to the City, that's when my face grayed  
Went to gym in eighth grade, showed those weaker boys my A  
Don't take me for a joke I'm no comedian  
Too many problems got me cracking jokes and twisting papyrus reeds again  
I'm goin up over the curb, drivin on the median  
Finally made it home, but I don't got the key to get in


	26. My Daddy's Gone Crazy

Pegasus on TV  
Hello boys and girls  
Today we're gonna talk about brother  
and brother relationships  
Do you have a brother?  
I'll bet you do  
Who's your brother?

Mokuba  
Seto, what are you doing?

Seto & Mokuba  
Ok then! everybody, listen up!

Seto  
I'm goin' to hell! Who's comin' with me?!?!?!?!?

Mokuba  
WHISPERS Somebody, please help him! I think my brother's gone cray-za!

Seto  
There's no duelist i can't defeat,  
I'm just too damn cool too beat  
No plane that i can't learn how to fly  
What do i gotta do to get through to you, to show you  
There ain't nothing i can't take these Blue Eyes to

Mokuba  
rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrraaaaaanh!

Seto  
Your stupid clique don't got brains or brawn  
I don't listen to Tea, and neither does Yugi, we both yawn  
On the blimp I call Joey a dog and Tristan a chimp  
Everybody knows that I am my own pimp  
I'm out the closet, i been lying my ass off  
All this time, me and yami been screwing with hats off

Yami  
Suck it Kaiba

Eminem  
So tell Tea and her cronies to back off  
Before i push this mothain' button and blast off  
And launch one of these missiles, and that's all  
Blow every ing thing except England the map off  
when will it stop? when will i knock the crap off?  
Mokuba, tell 'em okay

Mokuba  
My dad's lost it

Chorus:  
Seto  
There's really nothin' else to say i, i can't explain it

Mokuba  
I think my brotherss gone crazy!

Seto  
A little help from tara jade, wont you tell 'em okay

Mokuba  
I think my brothers gone crazy!

Seto  
Theres nothing you could do or say that could ever change me

Mokuba  
I think my dad's gone crazy!

Seto  
There's no one on earth can save me, not even mokuba

Mokuba  
I think my dads gone crazy!

Seto  
It's like Gozaburo always told me  
rana rana rana rana rana rana rana and codeine and goddamit,  
you little mother  
If you don't got nothin' nice to say then don't say nuthin'  
errr..  
don't care about that shit, bitch, I've got your ass whipped  
Duel a prick, and make a million bucks per second  
I'd rather put out another damn tournament  
I'd rather be a pussy-whipped bitch in Battle City  
And have Tea's lips glued to my face with a friendship ring on my hand  
Quit bringing me flowers! Quit giving me prose!  
Can't you see why i'm so mean? if y'all leave me alone,  
this wouldn't be my M.O.  
I wouldn't have to go eenie meenie minie mo  
Catch poor Ryou by his toe, hear him scream don't let him go  
Am i the only in one who's normal any more? 

Mokuba  
Seto!!!

Chorus

Seto  
My duels can make you cry, take you by surprise  
At the same time, and make you dry your eyes with the same rhyme  
So what you're seeing is a genius at work  
Which to me isn't work, so it's easy to misinterpret it at first,  
Cuz when i speak, it's tongue in cheek  
I'd yank my in teeth before id ever bite my tongue  
I'd slice my gums, get struck by in' lightning twice at once  
And die and come back as Pegasus's son  
And walk around the rest of my life spit on  
And kicked and hit with bits, every time i sung  
Like Shadi as soon as "walk like an egyptian" comes on  
More pain inside o' my brain,  
in the eyes of a little girl inside of a plane  
Aimed at the world trade, standin' on marik's grave,  
Screaming at the sky,  
till clouds gather  
it's Mai and Te  
And that's pretty much the gist of it  
Parents are pissed, but the kids love it  
Nine million duelists that I rush after with meat cleavers  
I don't blame you, i wouldn't let mokuba listen to me neither

Chorus

Seto  
Crazy

Mokuba  
HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA! You're funny Seto!


	27. No One's Iller Than Me

Mecha Scorpion: However it is on the page when I edit it is how I upload it. Yea, Bonz is the kid who got hooked on ecstasy... that's why I thought he was appropriate in that chapter. Eminem seems to have hundreds of songs... I'm guessing around 50. He's so cool. I want his new CD sooooooo badly. To everyone else, keep reviewin'!! Try to review every chapter because it really helps me in determining what kind of shit you like.

Featured Yugi, Pegasus, Kaiba

Pegasus  
Yeah...ha ha ha (BANG!), Yeah, Funny Bunny's comin' at you  
Yugi and the Yam, and Seto Kaiba ha ha

No one's iller than me (wha?)  
No one, no one is iller than me  
No one is iller than me  
It's Pegasus from KidsWB...

Yami  
I make cheerleaders wanna turn into duelists  
I keep the crowd biting they fingers  
Bring this competition and face my past  
Watching your whole crew slap my girlfriend's ass  
Hell nah you ain't seen a crew genius  
Murder whoever's opposed to us, pack your heaters  
We keep close, you can't beat us  
While your whole crew treat us like G's, you best believe this  
I done made fawning quadrapods outta these non-duelin' rejects  
While the whole world ejects your tape, it ain't no secret  
That your speech sounds fake, you can't stop it my mind state  
Makes it too late for cops in tryin' to stop the crime rate  
I'm two-souled, I'm painful to duelists then you can tell  
From these shells, how I gotta bend 'em like route canals  
I erase all spells, somethin' farther from gettin' bail  
Makes you wanna kill me yourself, you might as well  
Be within a 25 to life sentence, on linkin' trials  
Horrified, and keep on frontin', repentin' and lose they decks  
Everything is foul when Joey's let loose, I'll bet  
They're dumb enough to try to front and escape, how?  
They pants is wet and they're covered in grimy sweat  
Losers steady fallin' to their knees crying mommy, then BLAAAOW!

It's Pegasus from KidsWB  
Like I said no one is iller than me, hee hee!

Pegasus  
Me and Croquet and Kemo got high  
Drivin' down some a-hole named Kai  
Get my dick sucked late at night by a fuckin' ten-year-old tyke  
Still on probation for lettin' Cecelia get to close to the... Wheatshredder Family guy reference SS  
Should be takin' my medication, it's 9 to 10 I'm facin'  
Last week this woman I had to blast  
Cuz he tried to help me out after Yugi whipped my ass  
Ripped her apart, hung her neck by a hook  
Didn't realize it was Cecelia 'til I checked her pocketbook  
Screwing' Kaiba like Funny Bunny got me back on crack  
Better explain where the hell your TVs and VCRs is at  
I done lost 100 pounds, I ain't been eatin' like I should  
This wounded guy who looks like a dog in the street is sure lookin' good!  
Kidnapped Mokuba to turn her into my loveslave  
Throwin' fruit juice at day care centers and yell "EVERYBODY COME OUT AND PLAY"!  
Kaiba beat my ass and shot me in the back, two shots  
Cuz he found out I regularly give his 10-year-old bro' pot

No one, no one's iller than me  
It's Pegasus straight from KidsWB  
No one, no one is iller than me  
It's Pegasus straight from KidsWB

Kaiba  
Nobody better test me, cuz I don't wanna get messy  
Especially when I start to duel, speakin' freshly  
Hire thugs, give my brother hugs, guzzle two mugs  
Before I do drugs that make me throw up like flu bugs  
I've dueled true thugs, rugged unshaven messy scrubs  
Whippin' 40-cards like the fuckin' Pepsi clubs  
Play a fifth monster, and draw a sixth  
I'm on my seventh turn, now I gotta take a piss  
I'm hollerin' at these girls that got boyfriends  
Who cares who they're friends are  
I'm always flipping off someone else's girl like Y.B. does  
Who one day decided for me marik and 'im to rob the fuzz  
We walked up, stomped they asses and blew they buzz  
Badges get sandblasted  
Duel circles around you and drive you to acid  
Ignore Noa cryin' in his crib, I just run past it  
Fuckin' felon, headed to hell in a handbasket  
Kidnapping my bro will get you, your girl and your friends blasted  
Kidnapped and slapped in a van wrapped in Saran plastic  
Get your gay ass kicked, by these fantastic  
Blue Eyes White Dragons  
Flashin' in front of your face without the 4 Grand Masters Note: This is a reference to Series 1. SS

Seto Kaiba, ain't nobody iller than me

Pegasus  
I act gay like a scented fruitcake  
Massive lead in the game thanks to my eye and my fame  
Hair similar to your hippie aunt's, though now she's in a casket dead  
Due to a bombastic spread of acid heads  
Come to abort you like a bastard egg  
But I'd rather you come here and stretch those sexy legs  
Ask the kid from past to beat Keith  
Rockin' the most classic threads  
Flashin' bread, roll down the window  
Mokuba you have such mesmerizing eyes I'm hypnotized so, you can get 'til you're soulless  
You can get 'til you're soulless  
Yami you get him and him, Kaiba you get him and him  
I'll get him and him, leave the other two for my friend Kem  
Never magic's block, I block magic  
My magic's tighter, ante up and get your top fighters  
Got fired for jumpin' the counter with a mop stick  
Some midget with big hair ran up screamin' GET THE COPS QUICK!  
And got drop kicked, now he screamin' "Stop it..."  
Got clips to stop shit, rock shit and grab this hot shit  
Wherever you shop bitch, KaibaCorp's merchandise is the top pick  
Sick a-ya'll people lookin' at me like I got tits  
I shoot a rocket through your brain with my antics  
You people don't like me and you start to panic  
I've a card called Toon World, lose your dragon to theatrics  
And have your brother sewing socks bitch!  
We rock shit, we'll leave you bent  
Grab your company from the Big 5 by showin' them my tournament  
(No one...)

Ain't nobody iller than me

Pegasus  
It's Pegasus from KidsWB  
No one, no one is iller than me  
It's Yami and Yugi from KidsWB  
No one, no one is iller than me  
It's my lover-boy Kaiba from KidsWB

You have now witnessed 4 ill emcees!  
From the home of potholes and trash  
We'll lyrically blast...


	28. Just The Two Of Us

_Just the two of us.. (8X)_

Yami  
To Chibi no Yugi!! Yami loves you (hey)  
And I'ma always be here for you (hey) no matter what happens  
You're all I got in this world  
I would never give you up for nothin  
Nobody in this world is ever gonna keep you from me  
I love you

C'mon Yugi, we goin to the beach  
Grab a couple of toys and let me strap you in the car seat  
Oh where's Tea? She's takin a little nap in the trunk  
Oh that smell (whew!) I guess I musta runned over a skunk  
Now I know what you're thinkin - it's kind of late to go swimmin  
_But you know your Tea, she's one of those type of women_  
_that do crazy things, and if she don't get her way, she'll throw a fit_  
_Don't play with Yami's toy knife, Yugi let go of it (no!)  
And don't look so upset, why you actin bashful?  
Don't you wanna help Yami build a sand castle? (yeah!)  
And Tea said he wants to show how far she can float  
And don't worry about that little boo-boo on her throat  
It's just a little scratch - it don't hurt, she was eatin  
dinner while you were sweepin and spilled ketchup on her shirt  
Teaa's messy isn't she? We'll let her wash off in the water  
and me and you can pway by ourselves, can't we?_

Just the two of us.. (2X)  
And when we ride!  
Just the two of us.. (2X)  
Just you and I!  
Just the two of us.. (2X)  
And when we ride!  
Just the two of us.. (2X)  
Just you and I!

See honey.. there's a place called heaven and a place called hell  
A place called prison and a place called jail  
And Yami's probably on his way to all of em except one  
Cause Tea's got a new husband and a stepson  
And you don't want a brother do ya? (Nah)  
Maybe when you're old enough to understand a little better  
I'll explain it to ya  
But for now we'll just say Tea was real real bad  
She was preaching nonstant to daddy and made him real real mad  
But I still feel sad that I put her on time-out  
Sit back in your chair honey, quit tryin to climb out (WAHH!)  
I told you it's okay Yugi, wanna ba-ba?  
Take a night-night? Nan-a-boo, goo-goo ga-ga?  
He make goo-goo ca-ca? Da-da change your dia-dee  
Clean the baby up so she can take a nighty-nighty  
Your dad'll wake her up as soon as we get to the water  
Ten years after Orakalcos, me and my daughter

Just the two of us.. (2X)  
And when we ride!  
Just the two of us.. (2X)  
Just you and I!  
Just the two of us.. (2X)  
And when we ride!  
Just the two of us.. (2X)  
Just you and I!

Wake up porcupine head we're here, before we pway  
we're gonna take mama for a wittle walk along Domino pier  
Yugi, don't cry chibi, don't get the wrong idea  
That girl is too sweepy to hear you screamin in her ear (ma-maa!)  
That's why you can't get her to wake, but don't worry  
Da-da made a nice bed for mommy at the bottom of the lake  
Here, you wanna help me tie a rope around this rock? (yeah!)  
We'll tie it to her hand then we'll roll her off the dock  
Ready now, here we go, on the count of free..  
One.. two.. free.. WHEEEEEE! (whoooooshhhhh)  
There goes Tea, spwashin in the wa-ta  
No more fightin wit Yami, no more restraining order  
No more step-da-da, no more new brother  
_Wave to him goodbye, tell grandpa you love him (grandpa!)  
Now we'll go play in the sand, build a castle and junk  
But first, just help me with two more things out the trunk_

Just the two of us.. (2X)  
And when we ride!  
Just the two of us.. (2X)  
Just you and I!  
Just the two of us.. (2X)  
And when we ride!  
Just the two of us.. (2X)  
Just you and I!

Just the two of us.. (4X)

Yami  
Just me and you Yugi  
is all we need in this world  
Just me and you  
Your yami's will always be there for you  
Mou hitori no Yugi's always gonna love you  
Remember that  
If you ever need me I will always be here for you  
If you ever need anything, just ask  
Yami will be right there  
Mou hitori no Yugi loves you  
I love you Yugi


	29. Cum On Everybody

Yugi Hmm-hmm-hmhmhmmhm.. ahhh, Tea, I can stand it anymore! SHUT UP!  
Tea Yo, mic check  
Testing one, two, um... twelve  
(whattup whattup whattup.. Seto Kaiba)  
Tea This is my dance song (Seto Kaiba)  
Can you hear me?  
(Katsuya, Honda, Otogi)  
Tea Aight, ay turn my headphones up  
(bust it bust it)

Tea  
My favoite color is red, as in red hearts  
I'm planin' to rip Kujaku's apart  
Men always asking me what went wrong  
Bought Seto Kaiba's company so his brother could starve  
(I can't stand dumb people!)  
You thought I was livid, now I'm even more so  
Shit I got full blown AIDS and a sore throat  
I got a wardrobe with my DDR robe wolf whistle  
I'm in the fourth row, feigning autographs at your show  
(Yami can you sign this right here?) (I'm a girl.) (Ah...)  
I just remembered that I'm absent minded  
Wait, I mean I've lost my mind, I can't find it  
I'm freestylin every speech that I spit  
cause I don't even remember the words to my skit (umm, one two)  
I told the doc I need a change in sickness  
and gave Ryou herpes in exchange for syphilis  
Put Yami's LP on your Christmas gift list  
You want me to shut up? Here Yugi, sniff this

Cum on everybody -- friendship's alright (8X)

Tea  
Yo.. yo yo yo yo  
I tried friendship once and I'll try it again  
That's why I take markers and write on my friends' hands  
Cause I never give up, I'll ask Bakura what's up  
Why he's wavin it at everybody screamin, "I suck" (I SUCK!!!)  
I go on stage in front of a sellout crowd  
and yell out loud, "FRIENDSHIP Y'ALL! SAY IT LOUD!"  
Fuck punk, I'm givin it up, I'm sorry  
(But Tea it was awesome you had booze at your party!)  
I'm bored out of my gourd -- so I took a hammer  
and scratched pretty designs on the side of my Ford  
Guess I'm just a dumb dumb girl  
who's one sandwich short of a picnic basket (I ain't got it all)  
One tablet short of a full medicine cabinet  
I feel like my head has been shredded like lettuce and cabbage  
(ohhhhhhh) And if you ever see a video for this skit  
I'll probably be dressed up for Halloween looking scary and slit

Come on everybody -- friendship's alright (8X)

Tea  
Got friends on my list out in Domino  
Cause they think that I'm a the best thing since... ramenwolf whistle  
So I told em I was Mai V  
They was like, "Gee I don't know, she might be!"  
I told em, "Meet me at Kaiba's next concert  
I'll be standin by the Loch Ness Monster (okay) peace out (bye!!)"  
Then I jetted to the poor house  
Had to adapt to a preacher's lifestyle  
Broke out then I dipped quick back to the crib, put on lipstick  
Crushed up the Tylenol and ate it with Joey, a dipstick (slurping  
Made a couple of crank calls collect brrrrrrring, click  
"Malik Ishtar from Connecticut, can you accept?"  
I wanna dance to the songs all the fellas dub  
And kill every snotty girl that I'm jealous of  
So just remember when I bomb your set  
Yo, I only preach to make your mom's eyes wet

Come on everybody -- friendship's alright (20X)


	30. Battle

I speak in Egyptian, I smoke da Chronics, I aint illiterate, I don't need  
Hooked on Fonics, my rhymes are deep, i make em up in my sleep,  
well im countin white sheep wit lil Yug eep, just watch em leap ova the   
fence, they so dense, just keep jumpin, just keep pumpin tha thoughts  
inta my head, write em down in lead on a piece of paper, there aint no  
rhymes that are greater then mine, I write em one line at a time, they  
gotta shine, gotta stick out, yo whatchu say bout me, I'll battle u it'll be  
so e-z, I so good i could take out Kaiba, be like battlein a lady,  
don't get a affended i aint Shadi, Nah im just gamin' baby, don't get all  
crazy on me. lets go hit on Tea, I cant see, dis smoke is blindin, i be  
buildin dis deck, its so tight, hey yo you gotta light, Marik lets fight, yeah  
i am white, so what your moms PEGASUS!, dont shut me down, i aint no clown,  
just cause i got the hair dosent mean i dont care, Tristan be fair, i be better than  
Dartz with mah hair, Joe there we go, that wasn't so hard, man why you be  
actin like a fuckin retard, Pardon me, whatchu say, yea right Joe! i already no your  
gay.


	31. Rap Game

Joey  
The Card Game  
Dueling 1-0-1  
Brought to you by the Yugi-tachi  
You can't learn these rules in no handbook  
You ready to duel everybody?  
You ready to lose your soulâ�¦ gheh-gheh-gheh  
It's time to duel ...motherfucker

Malik   
I'm a disruptive Egyptian  
You made me crazy  
You should a slayed me as a baby  
Behavin shadier than Bakura  
And you aint even gotta pay me  
I take pleasure with takin a new mindslave daily  
You face me with remorse or not  
You'll faint fast  
I'm never messed up to where I can't whoop your ass  
Your neck will get slit with my auraral rod  
your friends are a bunch of sods  
bakura's cool but fool don't confuse him  
What happens these dudes get cocky and then I lose it  
I'm hard to find  
Cause I don't fight my own fights  
Even though they fight with my deckss in sight  
Then my yamis back censored word couresy of SS  
Marik is not real and in fact  
He's fully effective, a crack dealer   
Yall Ishizu sends me smack  
Den got a mack 10 wit it  
So I aint gotta rap  
But im thankful for that  
dont mistaken me black  
Or u be rotting in back of a caddillac

Tristan   
I'm told that I'm rough  
But I don't duel enough so they tell me to pipe down  
I pipe down when the gane shop is whipped out   
when I see that lil yugi moto get snipped out  
lights out joe adios goodnight (pow)  
now put that in your lil minds and bite down   
think for a minute cause the hype has died down  
that I wont go up into the arena right now  
and flip whatever duelist's there upside down  
I'm all for America, to fuck Duke Devlin  
tell that Tea Gardner slut to suck a dick  
censored line that didn't really make any sense anyway SS  
take away miho, I'm gonna find some other girl  
i taught joey everything he knows about the tricks of this trade  
magic cards trap cards monster cards gods  
if serenity believes me, god she's a sod  
she believes in joey so she duh needs a sensei  
Egyptian stuff just don't change to this day apparently  
im this way still tell that ea-tay ardner-gay  
ucksay my ickday (suck my dick)  
scuse my igpay atinlay (excuse my pig latin)  
but uckfay erenity-say

Tea  
this card game   
this card game  
I aint sellin my soul for this card game  
I aint digging no hole for this card game  
but im telling ya no it aint happening  
this card game  
this card game  
I aint sellin my soul for this card game  
I aint digging no hole for this card game  
this card game  
this card game

Kaiba  
i bet you rather me  
drink n drown in my own eniquity  
but fuck that ima stay till u all get sick of me  
and clutch and punch and spit on the pup who picked on me  
im throwing a rock at the next dog who's sicced on me  
im sayin you idiots dont know and quit playin  
if you're broke then you're brakin open the place where I'm layin  
you know, same stuff every persons done in their life  
i lived it thats why i speak on what i want when i write  
so why... should i... ever fear another man  
if he bleed like i bleed take a piss an he stand  
ok, you win... you can say we cant rap  
but no source never mean we aint buyin on what they say is whack 

Bakura  
i walk in the party and just start bustin  
right after i hear the last verse of self-destruction  
this liquor make me wanna blast the chrome  
to let you know that time without morris day and jerome  
im low down and with it, quickly called Malik  
to do a drive by on a 10-speed with Tea  
you feelin lucky? great  
i catch you outside of Burger World  
well just see, when I'm done with you you'll be a girl  
my life style is unstable, a masochistic addict  
they said no fighting in the club so i got kind of mad it  
was funny at first when I let Ryou have it  
he had to get on drugs but now he thinks he's a rabbit

Tea   
believe me  
Yami makes all the duelists queasy  
make three millions look easy  
every where ya turn you see me  
you hear me   
believe me  
for ya hear my speech for the needy  
let's write out a peace treaty  
dial J-O-E cause u need de  
posse to help you believe me

Pegasus  
i snatch the soul from a live one and piss on his bod  
this is odd  
these humble morons twistin my words  
we finally could  
say goodbye to Duelist Kingdom  
cause Pegasus an Kaiba  
have nothing in common  
the nastyest liar  
with decks in each hand  
we never let a satellite smash into California but we own ya  
no remorse  
drool of Kaiba's dog (the mutt)  
nuttin to do wit hands when i clap at yall   
put ya jaw on the ground  
wit my wig from the pound  
i pull you out of town  
before the law come around  
so we can battle wit traps  
so we can battle wit magic  
matter fact we can battle wit monsters

Tea  
this card game

Joey   
im too fuckin retarded  
i dont give a fuck about my dick   
thats why im dating Mai  
my crew had to tell lies  
who had the largest  
now they all is braindead  
and im rolling as a solo artist  
plus i made all the beats and wrote all the raps   
well i really didnt  
but i did according to this contract   
T'was the night before Christmas, i was stoned in the snow  
wit no where to go  
freezin 20 below  
forced to join Weevil and sing, "Ho ho ho"  
my little sis she shouldnt listen to these lyrics  
thats why i glued the headphones to her ear to make sure she hear it  
if rap dont work, im starting a group wit the motous (hahahaha)  
Tea sing the hook

Tea  
this card game  
this card game  
I aint sellin my soul for this card game  
I aint digging no hole for this card game  
but im telling ya no it aint happening  
this card game  
this card game  
I aint sellin my soul for this card game  
I aint digging no hole for this card game  
this card game  
this card game


	32. Just Lose It

Lyrics :

Into:

(Peggy making sounds)

ok..

Guess who's back

Back again

Shady's back

Tell a friend

Now everyone report to the castle

To the dance floor, to the castle

Now everyone report to the castle

Alright Stop...Pajama time

Verse 1:

Sit down Mokuba, On my lap

Guess who's back with a brand new trap

And i don't mean trap as in a new case of child investigation accusation

Aah aah aah aah aah

No worries, Peggy's got a brand new bag of toys

what else could i possibly do to make noise

I'd an touched on everything, but little boys

That's not a stab at Micheal

He's a really good guy, I'm the physco

I go a little bit crazy sometimes

I act a little bit gay while reading your minds

Good god, dip, do a little slide

Bend down, touch your toes and just glide

Up the center of the dance floor

Like Yugi from Domino when he nearly broke his toe

Nobody's gonna know who'd hear it

Give you a Funny Bunny plushie, it's okay

It doesn't bite

You smite me as I watch it rip

Chorus:

Now I'm gonna make you duel

'Cause I'm a fool

Yeah boy shake that thing,

Oops i mean girl girl girl girl

Girl you know you're my world

Alright now lose it

Aah aah aah aah aah

Just lose it

Aah aah aah aah aah

Go crazy

Aah aah aah aah aah

Oh baby

Aah aah

Oh baby baby aah aah

Verse 2:

It's Friday and it's my day

Used to duel all the way to sunday

Maybe till monday, i dunno what day

Everyday's just a holiday

Crusin' on the freeway

Feelin' kinda breezy

Got the top down, let my hair blow

I dunno where i'm goin'

All I know is when i get there

Someones says "You're really gaudy"

Excuse me miss, I don't mean to sound like a jerk

But I'm feel just a little stressed out from work

Could you get me some fruit juice and new underwear?

A plushie, maybe a new comic...yeah

What's your name girl

What's your sign

man you must be up out your mind

Shadi aah aah

Beer goggles blind

I'm just trying to unwind

Chorus:

Now I'm gonna make you duel

'Cause I'm a fool

Yeah boy shake that thing,

Oops i mean girl girl girl girl

Girl you know you're my world

Alright now lose it

Aah aah aah aah aah

Just lose it

Aah aah aah aah aah

Go crazy

Aah aah aah aah aah

Oh baby

Aah aah

Oh baby baby aah aah

Verse 3:

It's Tuesday and I'm locked up

I'm in jail and i don't know what happened

They say I was running butt naked

Down the street screaming

Aah aah aah aah aah

Well I'm sorry, I don't remember

All I know is this much

I'm not guilty

They said save it

boy we've got you on tape

yellin at a young duelist, touch my body

Now this is the part where the trap breaks down

It's really tense, no one makes a sound

Everything looks like it's 8 Mile now

The beat comes back and everybody lose themselves

A step back to reality

Look it's my rabbit!

You wanna sign me up to duel

I'm a grown man

Duba duba duba duba duba duba

I don't have any lines to go right here so

Duba duba duba duba fella's what? fella's what?

Grab Mokie and make Kaiba jealous ...what?

Black fools

White fools

Skinny fools

Fat fools

Tall fools

Small fools

I'm watching them duel

Everyone report to the castle

It's your chance for a little more hassle

Molestin' Kaiba's best 'cuz

Just go aah aah aah aah

It's so unresting

Chorus:

Now I'm gonna make you dance

It's your chance

Yeah boy shake that thing,

Oops i mean girl girl girl girl

Girl you know you're my world

Alright now lose it

Aah aah aah aah aah

Just lose it

Aah aah aah aah aah

Go crazy

Aah aah aah aah aah

Oh baby

Aah aah

Oh baby baby aah aah

Outro:

Mmmmm touch my body

Mmmmm touch my body

I touched Mokuba's body

I mean, uh, Joey touched his body... 


	33. Tylenol Island

Slim mother fuckin shadi....alright  
Cecelia, Pegasus, c'mon, yo

Verse 1:

I'm a soothsayer with no friends  
holdin the scales with no hands, just small cups at both ends  
Ishizu flashin you  
untill u see the fuckin past full of bodies and the exit wounds layin next to you.  
Bald with a turban on my head  
fuck that, everybody thinks I wear a dress  
jumped outta a 93 floor of a buildin  
and sent everywindow to the Shadow Realm on the way down (keep filmin)  
woke up to a hospital staff  
got up and laughed  
showed them their past  
and sufficated Solomon's oxygen mask  
if i get any higher ima get the east and west confused again  
fly back to egypt and stand in the cross-fire

(Joey's voice) oh hi...um Mai?  
i've got the movie read  
what time are you gettin off.....work  
or shall i say  
what time are you comin over

Verse 2:

yo, yo, im only smilin when im violent,  
got on the plane wylin,  
told the piolet to fly me to Alcatraz Island  
stewardess like you restless?  
no way, I'm restful so hold this jet still so i can eat this pretzels  
Forget school,  
the other kids are disrespectfull,  
they hold me down and play connect-the-dots with my freckles on my head  
i can't take it  
i'm tryin to gain weight,  
so i watch Bakura eat steak  
and then I swallow the whole plate  
and walk through the wall, naked  
it scares people  
to teach kids family values  
cuz every senile grandpa should allo you to pop vaiulums  
and never tell Marik to hit sum 1 unless you got a reason  
and if there ain't a reason  
make 1 up and watch him start swingin


	34. I'M Shady

Yugi  
Who came through with two soulful eyes to terrorize your thoughts (huh?)  
Told you how to act cute but secretly wish you could murder your girl (I did!)  
Gave you all the three million dollars and told you to sit and twirl  
Won so many tourneys and still screamed, "I love the world!"  
(I'm Yugi Moto..) so come and kill me while my name's hot  
And shoot me twenty-five times in the same spot (Ow!)  
I think Yami's got a generation brainwashed  
to wear leather and look hot til they brains rot (uhh-oh)  
Stop they blood flow until they veins clot  
I need a pain shot, instead of band-aids I use tape scotch  
Purple haze and dueling monsters  
Drop the points and look out for Joey's father (uh-oh)  
Malik Shaved his armpits and wore a tank top  
Weirdo, I told you that he can't stop  
You gotta make em love you 'fore you make em fear you  
So everybody fuss over me or I'ma come and kill you

I got friends, I got fans, I got dueling skills  
I'm your best friend when you need, some advice to set you free  
You know me, I'm your friend, when you need support  
(I'm Yugi Moto..) I'm Yugi!!

Yugi  
I like happy things, I'm really calm and peaceful (uh-huh huh)  
I like dogs, cats, I like people  
I like funny things that make me happy and gleeful (hehehe)  
when my teacher's face fell off was unspeakable (Woo!)  
The ill type, I stab myself with a steel spike  
while I blow my brain out, just to see what it feels like  
cause this is how I am in real life (mm-hmm)  
I don't want to just die a normal death, I wanna be killed twice (uh-huh)  
I shove Yami in control when faced with a done threat  
while Tea's high off of things they hasn't even sung about yet (Huh?)  
So buy a ticket by tonight - 'cause Kaiba and I  
are gonna harass Dark Magician Girl because she's too nice (Help me! Help me!)  
I try to keep it positive and play it cool  
Yami shoots up the playground and tell the kids to stay in school (Stay in school!)  
Cause they think he's the one they can relate to and look up to better  
Tonight I think I'll write my biggest fan Tea a fuck you letter

I got friends, I got fans, I got dueling skills  
I'm your best friend when you need, some advice to set you free  
You know me, I'm your friend, when you need support  
(I'm Yugi Moto..) I'm Yugi!!

Yugi  
Yo.. I watch your dueling and act like I don't like it  
(Aww he's talking back!)  
Six months later you see me use your strategy  
(What?? That liar!)  
People don't buy anything no more they just rob it  
That's why I'm still broke though my Grandpa has a Gameshop (Yup, uh huh)  
But they love it when you make your business public  
so fuck it, I've got rabies while we on the subject (uh-huh)  
And if I told you I'm deranged y'all would like me  
cause you stupid motherfuckers think I'm playin when I say it  
-- Well, I do hate you, and you  
Don't like Tea, don't like Joey, I do like Mai (uh-huh)  
'Cause she along with me thinks that you freaks should die(yup)  
And I don't even feel like telling you why  
Yami's all lies (uh-uhh) thinks it's so cool he's alive  
And I don't like Tristan, his hair looks weird  
It's not a hammer, yet I bet I could use it as one...  
I don't know yet, I'm too scared to test it

I got friends, I got fans, I got dueling skills  
I'm your best friend when you need, some advice to set you free  
You know me, I'm your friend, when you need support  
(I'm Yugi Moto..) I'm Yugi!!  
(Ha hah-ha, ha! Ha hah, hah..) I told you I was Yugi!!  
(Ha hah-ha, hah-ha! Ha hah, hah-ha, hah-ha, hah-ha)  
Y'all didn't wanna believe me!  
I'm Yugi!!  
.. And that's my name


	35. Quitter

Yami  
Yo.. I dedicate to this.. to yo..

imitating Tea Gardner  
To all my friends, keepin y'all in health  
Let's tell this Kaiba person to go fuck himself  
Cause it's cruel when you cause a bad heart conditionin  
which I create, cause that's my mission  
So listen close, to what we say  
because this type of fag claims to never be gay, I..

rapping normally  
.. knew you was jealous from the day that I met you  
I upset you, cause I get respect. I bet you (boy)  
I'm even liked better by your brother who left you(c'mon!)  
And now you hate Joe because Pegasus left you  
Unbelievably angry because I duel good  
No respect in the hood, fled to his neck of the woods  
Got in touch with his roots, found the idiot in his  
blood

and said, "Heck, this heart of the cards stuff is good!!"  
So he picks the his deck and he plays a few cards  
He can't duel, or win, but he wants to go far (haha)  
Puts a Dueldisk out and rules for part of the year  
then Yugi Motou and Marik Ishtar come  
from  
out of nowhere  
It's the start of an era, rock rap's harder this year  
No one's tryin to hear you fart in a chair  
sittin on stage, ruminating strategems in your ear  
So you start to get scared, sit back and spark an  
idea

Figure you can diss me to jump start your career  
I punch you in your fuckin chest 'til your heart kicks in gear (bitch)  
And fuck your underground buddy's nameless crew  
Like I'ma say they  
names  
so they can be famous too

Chorus 2X: Yami sung  
You just a.. quitter, and you bitter cause I came along  
and the days of Kaibaland are gone  
And if you talk about my aibou in a song again  
I'ma kill you (I'ma kill you)

Yami  
Yo.. heart attack to stroke  
from  
the system you made  
to the cards that you played, your fuckin rematch idea's a joke  
And I'ma tell these motherfuckin fans the truth  
The reason why you dissed me first and I answered you  
You said I passed you in a lobby and I glanced at you  
like I ain't notice you? BITCH, I had a show to do!  
Like I'm supposed to be star-struck, come over to you  
You better shut your fuckin mouth while you oh-for-two  
Back in time Gozaburo opened the show for you  
Rocked the crowd better and stole the whole show from you  
Took your motherfuckin brother and screwed him too  
So you fall in a slump and get all emotional  
So now you red Egyptian on the God Cards while others are stumped  
Confused as fuck cause now your  
tournament  
blows chunks  
Mr. Mr. Ass Kisser to get accepted in his brother's heart  
quicker but never last, and last place is a..

Chorus  
Aight listen (look)  
So this is what we ask of our fans  
If you ever see Kaiba, WHOOP HIS ASS  
Hit him with sticks, bricks, rocks, throw decks at him  
Kick him, spit on him, treat him like a bore and slap him  
Do it for me, do it for Joey, do it for Tristan  
Do it for rock, do it for rap, do it for Tea  
Do it for Mokuba, do it just to do it, stop it  
He's an idiot, he ain't gon' hit you back, he's nothin!  
Shit in five years we'll all be "Eating at Kaiba's"  
And he'll be bussin tables in that place, cleanin the toilets  
Aiyyo.. stop this, cut it out

music stops

Aiyyo Head, that's why I killed your mother The rest of this line has been courteously censored. SS!

beat changes to 2Pac's "Hit 'Em Up"

Kill Kaiba! - Hahaha  
Kill Kaiba! - DUEL! What? What?  
Kill Kaiba! - .. yo, yo  
Kill Kaiba! - Haha! Look

First off, fuck your company and the shit you say  
Diss my girl, but at least I got a bitch, you gay  
You claim to be an influence but you ain't that bright  
So shut up gay boy, get your deck, let's fight  
Plus I punch you in the chest, weak hearts I rip  
Gozuburo, forty and white, evil ass dickhead  
I keep 'em comin while you runnin out of breath  
Steady duckin while I'm punchin at your chest, you need to rest  
Dilated, go ask your people how I leave ya  
with your three DD's, nobody sees, when they released  
Evidence, don't mess around with  
real  
MC's  
who ain't ready for no underground beef, so fuck geeks  
I let you faggots know it's on for life  
but KaibaCorp might die tonight, haha  
Rich boy murdered on wax and killed  
Duel with me and take a heart pill, you know!

Chorus: Yami  
You hacked up a loogie when you see Yugi  
Call the doctor to heal your heart  
They shocked you back to life at the clinic  
but you 'bout to get relapsed any minute  
Kaiba, I hit 'em up!

Hahaha, yo  
check  
this out  
You brothers ain't even on my level  
I'ma let Pegasus ride on your little brother!

Tea  
Yo! Get out the way yo, get out the way yo  
Seto Kaiba's heart just stopped  
Yami shocked him back, he had another heart attack  
Kaiba's gettin his ass floored for talkin back  
Little faggot Hamburgular, I show you where the burgers are  
At your own restaraunt, while I'm servin ya  
Drop and stomp your whole heart 'til it stops  
Call the cops, I'ma beat your ass while they watch

Tristan  
Ha ha, now we got the whole industry makin fun of you Seto  
Where's your Kaibaland now? There's only one of you Seto  
You a petty coward, you ain't ready to steady go a round  
with some killers from Battle City to Egypt

Chorus

Yami  
Got in his ass and now this faggot wanna mention me still  
this ain't no freestyle battle KaibaCorp gettin killed  
with his chest open  
Tryin to throw a move, but you just chokin  
Havin a stroke and now you learn why crackers never earned a dime  
cause you SUCK motherfucker you should learn to rhyme  
Talkin 'bout you packin pistols but it's funny to me  
You ain't never been in trouble, you just wanna be me  
I've been thrown in jail  
on my way to fuckin prison, pistol whippin tail, ha  
Kaiba remember when I passed you in the lobby that day?  
That shit was obvious you probably was gay, ha  
Now it's all about business, you gave up dueling  
Forty-nine thousand dollars, the week your shit drop  
while my  
duels  
makin fan screams  
Two and a half million scanned by the second week  
Idiots but I eat it all up!

Duke  
I'm from Detroit's Pemberton Ave., where bullets tear you in half  
Fuck your business, we got an uzi for all you fags  
Get the shit out of our stereo, Dilated you violated  
Now you 'bout to get annihilated, we gon' bury you  
Iriscience get choked up and yoked up  
All you underground bitches get your throats cut

Joey  
Hello?! Is you stupid?  
I smash Seto Kaiba with his fuckin DuelDisk  
and  
stuff  
him in cardboard, chopped up in a box  
with sixteen parts, I stomped on his heart  
Yugi-tachi, the Shadow Realm, fuck your brother while you watch  
Keep your mansion locked and block your door  
Cause we'll screw your mind up like motherfuckin Pegasus

Yami  
You gave my gramps heart attack seizures  
Too many hours sleeping with Ishizu  
Corporate devil, washed up has-been  
Mixed up cracker who always takes too much aspirin

laughing  
Yo, aiyyo cut this shit off  
needle drags, beat stops

Okay, that's it, I'm done, I promise, I'm done, that's it  
I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I promise  
I just believe in kickin a man while he's down  
Ra damn! I quit  
Mention my aibou' in a song again you sly punk


	36. Hi! My Name Is

YO! Great news! I am _very _pleased because... I got Encore! And it's soooooooooo bitchin'! :) :) :) :D I am totally hooked on the song "My 1st Single." I think I'll make a parody of that for Joey... Anyway, thanks for all the reviews, thanks to everybody, love you all, mwa mwa, and all that crap... crap. Um, where did my shoes go? I lost my sneakers again! Shit...

Hi! My name is (what?)...my name is (who?)...  
my name is... It's Ishtar  
Hi! My name is (huh?)...my name is (what?)...  
my name is... It's Ishtar

Ahem...excuse me!  
Can I have the attention of you saps for one second...

Hi kids! Do you like violence? (yeah yeah yeah!)  
Wanna see me stick a Millennium Rod through each one of my eyelids? (uh huh!)  
Wanna copy me and do exactly like I did? (yeah yeah!)  
Kill Rishid and get screwd up worse than my life is? (huh?)  
My brain's dead weight, I'm tryin' to get my head straight   
But I can't figure out which of the Pharaoh's girlfriends I want to impregnate (Ummmm..)  
Mai V said: "Marik you're crazy."   
Uh-uhhh! "Then why is your hair like that? It sprouts out like a daisy"  
Well since age 10 I've felt like I'm someone else  
Cuz I hung my original self from the top bunk with a belt   
Got pissed off and ripped Mai Valentine's tits off  
And smacked her so hard I knocked her clothes backwards like Kris Kross   
I smoke a fat pound of grass and fall on my ass  
Faster than a fat Serenity who sat down too fast  
C'mere slut! (Marik, wait a minute, that's my girl dog!)  
I don't care, God sent me to piss the Pharaoh off

Hi! My name is (what?)...my name is (who?)...   
my name is... It's Ishtar  
Hi! My name is (huh?)...my name is (what?)...  
my name is... It's Ishtar

Rishid wanted to have sex with me when I was five  
Now know this, Rishid WAS a guy  
I smacked him in his face with the scripts  
Called him a disgrace  
Had him tattoo himself on the face (Owwwwwwww!)  
Walked in a Ryou's fan club, had my jacket zipped up  
Flashed his girlfriend and stuck my dick in the tip cup (Wsssshhhhh...)  
Extraterrestrial, enslav'n pedestrians

Rap'n Tea while she's screamin' "LET'S JUST BE FRIENDS!"  
99 of my life I was lied to  
I just found out my sister does more dope than I do  
I told her I'd grow up to be a tomb keeper  
Make a record about killin' thugz and name it after her (Oh thank you!)  
You know you blew up when the women rush the stands  
To try to touch your hands like some screamin' Kaiba fans (Aaahhhhhh!)  
Cecelia's wife passed so asked for my autograph S.S.: Think about that. Cecelia's wife. ... Bwahahahahaha!! XD XD  
So I signed it: 'Hey Ce, thanks for the support, two-timer!

Hi! My name is (what?)...my name is (who?)...  
my name is... It's Ishtar  
Hi! My name is (huh?)...my name is (what?)...  
my name is... It's Ishtar

Stop this duel! Joey's been classified as a grade A fool! (Get him!)   
Kaiba don't just stand there, INSULT HIM!  
I'm not ready to leave, it's too scary to die  
I'll have to be carried inside the cemetery and buried alive  
Am I comin' or goin'? I can barely decide,  
I just drank "milk"...dare me to drive? (Go 'head.) A/N: You know, how they color Mai's red wine white?  
All my life I was very deprived  
I ain't had a good meal in years, my hair is too big too hide  
It's up like the Pharaoh on coke  
I shout when I talk, I'll beat up anything that walks (C'mere.)  
When I was little I used to get so hungry I would throw fits  
HOW YOU GONNA BREAST FEED ME RISHID? YOU AIN'T GOT NO TITS!  
I lay awake and strap myself in the bed  
Put a bulleproof vest on and shoot myself in the head (BANG!)  
I'm crazy mad (MUAHAHA!)  
And by the way when you see my dad? (Yeah.)  
Tell him that I slit his throat AGAIN in this dream I had

Hi! My name is (what?)...my name is (who?)...  
my name is... It's Ishtar  
Hi! My name is (huh?)...my name is (what?)...  
my name is... It's Ishtar


	37. Soldier

I'm a ruler  
I'm a ruler  
I'm a ruler  
I'm a ruler

Verse 1  
Yo... Never was a thug, just infatuated with slugs, Never was a gangsta, till I  
had this Puzzle to debug  
And got the rep of a higher-up when I beat Kaiba-up  
Mopping the floor with his ass  
stealin' his grass  
I'm willin' to stick out my neck, for respect if it meant life or death, never live  
to regret what I said  
when you're me, people just wanna see, if it's true, if it's you, what you say  
in your traps, what you do  
so they feel, as part of your obligation to fulfill, when they see you on the  
streets, face to face, are you for real  
in confrontation it's all conversation, if you feel you're in violation, any  
hesitation'll get you killed  
if you feel it, kill it, if you conceal it, reveal it  
Bein' reasonable will leave you full of bullets but make Tea happy, screw it  
till I'm empty, tempt me, push me, Yugi's voice is muffled, I need a good reason to give this  
deck another shuffle...

Chorus  
I'm a ruler, these decks hold up so much, they won't budge, I'll never  
fall or fold up  
I'm a ruler, Even if Yugi's collar bones crush or crumble, I will never slip or   
stumble  
I'm a ruler, These decks hold up so much, they won't budge, I'll never  
fall or fold up  
I'm a ruler, Even if Yugi's collar bones crush or crumble, I will never stumble

Verse 2  
I love tellin' you off, it gets me off, like my friends, when their judgement always  
lets me off  
all you idiots gotta do is set me off, I'll violate and all the  
honorable bets be off  
I'm a lit fuse, anything I do bring it's news, God-card bearing champ  
five eight, who collects stamps?  
Soon as I draw it, sweat bleeds through your armpits, an excellent method to empty the  
next moshpit  
It's actually better cause instead you sendin' them to the realm, you can hurt 'em and come  
back again and kick dirt at 'em and yell  
it's like pourin' salt in the wounds, assault and get sued, you can smell the  
lawsuits soon as I waltz in the room  
everybody halts and stops, calls the cops, all you see is Malik comin' out  
in a tank top  
runnin' my mouth all the way to a Little Rock parkin' lot, you'll all get shot  
whether its your fault or not, 'cuz...

Chorus

Verse 3  
I spit it slow so these kids know that I'm talkin' to 'em, give it back to  
these critics and sock it to 'em  
I'm like a thug, with a little bit of midget influence, I spew it, and look how I  
got you duelist's rockin' to it  
you wannabes could never do it like I could do it, don't even try it,  
you'll look stupid, do not pursue it  
I can fit more in my deck than Claire Redfield can in her pockets  
that steering wheel made me wanna vomit  
so ticky-tock listen as the sound ticks on the clock, listen to the sound of  
the anchor as it makes its drop  
listen to the sound of me spillin' the heart of the cards, dummies  
know that I'll never be penned up again  
Full of controversy until I retire my jersey, till the fire inside dies and   
expires at five thousand and thirty  
and Good Ra have mercy on any more of these duelists that verse me, and put a curse  
on sororities in the face of adversity  
I'm a...

Chorus

Yo Left, Yo Left, Yo Left, Right, Left  
Yo Left, Yo Left, Yo Left, Right, Left  
Yo Left, Yo Left, Yo Left, Right, Left  
Yo Left, Yo Left, Yo Left, Right, Left


	38. My Band

Author's Note: I know you don't like it... or maybe you do, I dunno. I just took out some of the words that I found offensive or rude, crude or lewd, and inserted censored instead. Don't let it go to your head... WHY IS IT WHEN I WRITE AUTHOR'S NOTES I ALWAYS END UP WITH A RHYME!? Ugh... every time...

Intro: Joey

I don't know Yug'  
I think everybody's all jealous and shit  
Cause I'm like the lead singer of the band dude  
And I think, everybody's got a bone to pick with me dude  
And they need to take it up with me after the duel

Hook: Joey

Because these chicks don't even know the name of my band  
But they're all on me like they wanna hold hands  
Cause once I blow they know that I'll be the man  
All because I'm the lead singer of my band

Verse: Joey

So I get off stage right? drop the mic  
Walk up to these hot chicks and I'm all like  
What's up, ladies? My name's Joey's, baby  
I'm the lead singer of Yami's band baby  
They're all like "Oh my God! It's him"  
"Becky oh my censored God it's him!"  
"I swear to censored God, dude you censored rock!"  
"Please Joey, please let me suck your definitely censored!?"  
Now by now the rest of the clique get jealous  
Especially when I drop the beat and do my accapellas  
All the chicks start yellin, all the hot babes  
Throw their bras and there shirts and there panties on stage  
So like every single night they pick a fight with me  
But when fight it's kinda like sibling rivalry  
Cause Serenity's kinda hot on Mai you see  
Dude I just think they're tryin to steal the light from me  
Yesterday Bakura tried to pull a knife on me  
Cause I told him Kisara's my wife to be S.S.: Kisara... from a later season, in ancient egypt. She's pretty.  
This rockstar shit, it's the life for me  
And all the other guys just despise me because beats

Hook: Joey

Because these chicks don't even know the name of my band  
But they're all on me like they wanna hold hands  
Cause once I blow they know that I'll be the man  
All because I'm the lead singer of my band

Bridge: Joey

My Band! My Band! My Band! My Band! My Band!  
My Band! My Band! My Band! My Bannnnnnnnnnnnd!  
Baby Yeaaaah!

Verse: Duke

You just wanna see a girl backwards dont you  
Hey dad! How come we don't raffle off power tools?  
Smash Joey's vocals and do a performance  
But we in a van, and he in a tour bus  
You don't want my autograph, you's a liar  
And naw I'm Duke (Oh, I thought you were Kaiba!)  
And what the Hell is wrong with our dressing room?  
Cause our toilet is lookin smaller than a decimal  
It's kinda hard to pee when the electricity don't work and I can't even see!  
All I did was watch a Richard Simmons tape,  
So I'm more intact, tryin to get past when I got raped,  
My cheerleader's Doin jumpin jacks while I gettin whipped on my back

Verse: Tristan/Bakura (Joey)

Look at Joe lil punk ass, thinkin he the shit  
Yeah I know man by himself he's watching chick flicks  
Hey, I thought we had and interview with Yami Motou  
(No I had an interview, give me my tickets now I gotta go)  
You gon' be late for soundcheck  
Man, I ain't going to soundcheck  
Man, our mics is screwed up  
And his always sound best  
You know what man? I'ma say something  
Ay'yo Joe! (What's up Tris!) Man, nothing  
I though you was about tell him off man, what's up?  
Man, I'm a tell him what I feel like it man, shut up  
And you ain't even back me up, and we supposed to be crew  
Man I was about to talk right after you, I swear  
Awe man, whatever!  
I swear man!

Hook: Joe

Because these chicks don't even know the name of my band  
But they're all on me like they wanna hold hands  
Cause once I blow they know that I'll be the man  
All because I'm the lead singer of my band

Verse: Yugi

They say the lead singer rocks, but the group does not  
With some sold out arenas to amusement parks  
I'm gon' let the world know that Joe isn't that hot  
I should cut his mic off when the music starts (Hey yo it's...)  
Ready to snap on a overzealous fan  
Everytime I hear (Hey dude, I love your band!)  
We ain't a band brat, we don't play instruments  
So why he gettin 90 and we only get 10 percent?  
And these guys actin funny every area code  
(Yugi carry my bag!) I'm too short, carry your own  
Can't even see the stage, there's tall people in my way  
(Who in the world are you? Where's Kaiba and Peg?)

Verse: Duke

God dammit I'm sick of this group  
Time for me to go solo, and make some loot  
I told you I made the beats and wrote all the raps  
Til Bakura.. slipped me some crack  
Lose Yourself video.. I was in the back  
Superman video.. I was in the back  
For the media, I got some suggestions  
Fuck Joey, ask us a question  
Like who's D12? How'd we get started?  
(But what about Wheeler?) Bitch are you retarded?  
Anyway, I'm the popularist guy in the group  
Big ass stomach, Miho thinks I'm cute (Hey sexy!)  
50 told me do sit-ups to get buff  
Did two and a half, and couldn't get up  
Screw D12, I'm out of this band  
I'm about to start a group that's actually a band

Bridge: Joey

TEA WHY CANT U SEE YOUR THEE  
ONLY ONE FOR ME AND IT JUST  
TEARS MY ASS APART TO KNOW THAT  
YOU DONT KNOW MY BAAAANNNNDDDD!

Hook: Bakura

These chicks don't even know the name of his band (Haha!)  
But they're all on him like they wanna hold hands (We hate you!!)  
Cause once he blows they know that he'll be the man (Yeah!)  
All because he's the lead singer.. Hahaha

Bridge: Joey

My Band! My Band! My Band! My Band! My Band!  
My Band! My Band! My Band! My Bannnnnnnnnnnnd!

Talking: Yugi

Yeah!  
The hardest boy band in the world!  
D12!

Outro: Joey

I'm the lead singer of my band  
I have a picture of Kisara in her underpants  
I'm the lead the singer of my band my salsa  
Makes all the pretty girls want to dance  
My salsa, Whoo Whoo!  
Look out for my next single its called my salsa  
My salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa, my salsa  
My salsa make all the pretty girls want to dance and take of their underpants  
My salsa make all the pretty girls want to dance and take of their underpants  
My salsa  
Where did everybody go?


	39. Mosh

Intro:

(Kids: I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America..

(BOOM)

(Kids: And to the Republic..)

Bakura: People..

(Kids: For which it stands..)

Bakura: Hahaha..

(Kids: One nation under God.. Indivisible..)

Bakura: It feels so good to be back!

Verse 1:

I scrutinize every wall, memorize every hall  
I spit it once, refuel, re-energize and rewind  
I give power to the weak, my insight's through his mind  
I exercise my right to mail you express when I feel it's time  
It's just all in your mind - what you interpret it as  
I say to fight, you take it as I'ma mess with someone's past  
If you don't understand, don't even bother to ask  
A robber who has grown up with a troubling past  
Who has blown up now to duel phenomenon  
That has, or at least shows, no difficulty multi-taskin' and juggling both  
Perhaps mastered-his-craft slash entrepreneur  
Who has helped Malik launch a few more blasts  
Who's had a few obstacles thrown his way  
Through the past five-thousand years  
Typical manure, moving past that  
Tea, Mrs. kiss-his-ass-crack, she's a class-act  
Yami's Rubber-band man, yeah, he just snaps back

Chorus:

Come along, follow me, as I lead through the darkness  
As I provide just enough spark that we need to proceed  
Carry on, give me hope, give me strength  
Come with me, and I wont steer you wrong  
Put your faith in your trust, as I guide us through the fog  
To the light at the end of the tunnel we gon' fight  
We gon' charge, we gon' stomp  
We gon' march through the swamp  
We gon' mosh through the marsh  
Take us right through the doors  
Come on..

Verse 2:

All the people up top, on the side and the middle  
Come together, let's all form this swamp just a little  
Just let it gradually build, from the front to the back  
All you can see is a sea of duelists, some white and some black  
No matter what color, all that matters we're gathered together  
To celebrate for the same cause, no matter the weather  
If it rains, let it rain  
Yeah, the wetter the better  
They ain't gon' stop me - they can't  
I'm stronger now, more then ever  
They tell us "No", I say "Yeah"  
They tell us "Stop", I say "Go"  
Rebel with a rebel yell  
Raise hell - I gon' let em know  
Stomp, push, shove, mush..  
Line censored as it offends our country. S.S.  
Until I have all the seven Millennium items in my home, c'mon, just..

Chorus:

Come along, follow me as I lead through the darkness  
As I provide just enough spark that we need to proceed  
Carry on, give me hope, give me strength  
Come with me, and I wont steer you wrong  
Put your faith in your trust, as I guide us through the fog  
To the light at the end of the tunnel we gon' fight  
We gon' charge, we gon' stomp  
We gon' march through the swamp  
We gon' mosh through the marsh  
Take us right through the doors  
Come on..

Verse 3:

Imagine it pourin', it's rainin' down on us, Ryou Ryou's name is actually pronounced Ree-OH... but most pronounce it Ree-yuu. I'm using it both ways.  
I see Moshpits outside o' Kaiba's office, do you?  
Someone's tryin to tell us something  
Maybe this is Ra just sayin' they're responsible  
For this monster - this coward that they have empowered  
This is Odion  
Look at his head noddin'  
How could we allow something like this without pumpin' our fists, Ryou?  
Now, this is our final hour, let's go  
Let me be the voice, and your strength and your choice  
Let me simplify the rhyme just to amplify the noise  
Try to amplify it, times it, and multiply it by sixteen million  
People aren't equal at this high pitch  
Maybe we can reach Joey Wheeler through my speech  
Let the Pharaoh answer our high anarchy  
Strap Yugi with a AK-47, let him go duel on his own  
Let him impress grandpa that way  
No more blood to boil, you got your own battles to fight on your own soil, doncha?  
No more psychological warfare to trick you to thinking that they're loyal  
If they don't serve their own friend, they're patronizing their hero  
Look in his eyes, its all lies  
Violet walls washed with blood, let's us cake 'em in mud  
Washed out and wiped and replaced with his own face  
Mosh now or die  
If you get sniped tonight, you'll know why  
'Cuz I told you to fight

Chorus:

Come along, follow me as I lead through the darkness  
As I provide just enough spark that we need to proceed  
Carry on, give me hope, give me strength  
Come with me, and I wont steer you wrong  
Put your faith in your trust, as I guide us through the fog  
To the light at the end of the tunnel we gon' fight  
We gon' charge, we gon' stomp  
We gon' march through the swamp  
We gon' mosh through the marsh  
Take us right through the doors  
Come on

Outro:

Eminem: And as we proceed to mosh through this electric storm.. in these closing statements, if they should argue, let us beg to differ.. as we set aside our differences, and assemble our own army to disarm this weapon of mass destruction that we call our Pharaoh for the present.. and mosh for the future of our next generation.. to speak and be heard.. Yami... Yugi...

(Kids: Hear us, hear us?.. Hahaha)


	40. Bitch

(Mai talking on phone)  
Joey, its Mai, Um Serenity did not have me call you  
however I just watched Odion moon me from her car  
It is the most disgusting thing I have ever seen  
in my entire life and I seriously want to call his  
fucking agent and tell them how fucking disgusting  
he is, it like makes me upset, I am now nauseous and  
I cant eat lunch, goodbye

Note: I was going to say "I just watched Odion duel frm her car". Moon me was more disgusting though. The reference to this the dueling part, though, was that in the duel against Joey, Odion's monster absorbed Joey's monsters, but in the Japanese version, he ATE them. Cool ne?


	41. Bad Influence

_Joey_

**Kaiba**  
Chorus One  
_Just pull the plug!_  
**Noa says that I'm a bad influence on my brother  
I say the Pegasus already made him messed up, I'm just addin to it  
They say I'm homicidal, dueling preteens' newest idol c'mon!  
C'mon duel as I do, go ahead get good and do it**  
_Just pull the plug!_  
**Noa says that I'm a bad influence on my brother  
I say the Pegasus already made him messed up, I'm just addin to it  
They say I'm homicidal, dueling preteens' newest idol c'mon!  
C'mon duel as I do, go ahead get good and do it**  
_Just let it gooo!_

**Kaiba, **_Joey_  
**Me and my company, creating dueling ecstasy with laser beams  
I'ma sit on top of the world I'm here and shame on Gozaburo  
I'm more than ill, you know that you saw it  
I'm in denial more than Duke was before he came out of the closet Ahh!**  
_My life's a Human horror film  
but with a lot funnier plot, and people that heal me  
cause I'ma still be madd duelist, whether I got money or not yup_  
_As long as I've got porn, and that's what I bought  
Hey Kaiba! I'll be in a canoe paddlin, makin fun of your yacht_  
_But I would like an award  
for the more amiable juvenile to be sweet on a whore The Domino Source her name's Mai!  
and a wardrobe I can afford  
Otherwise I might get sent back after the semi-finals in a shaky old Ford  
And you wonder what the fuck I need more ProZac for_  
**Everybody's pissin' me off; as Alister complains about my daddy's tanks  
his necklace looks like a turquoise middle finger flippin me off  
No shit I'm a great danger to my healthÂ  
Why else would I brutalize you in a duel then jump in the grave and bury myself?**

Chorus Two  
_Just pull the plug!_  
**Noa says that I'm a bad influence on my brother  
I say the Pegasus already made him messed up, I'm just addin to it  
They say I'm homicidal, dueling preteens' newest idol c'mon!  
C'mon duel as I do, go ahead get good and do it**  
_Just pull the plug!_  
**Noa says that I'm a bad influence on my brother  
I say the Pegasus already made him messed up, I'm just addin to it  
They say I'm homicidal, dueling preteens' newest idol c'mon!  
C'mon duel as I do, go ahead get good and do it**  
_Just let it gooo!_

_Joey, _**Kaiba**  
I'm the illest rapper to hold the cordless, patrollin corners  
Looking for hookers to punch in the mouth with a roll of quarters  
I'm meaner in action than Roscoe beatin James Todd Sr.  
across the back with vacuum cleaner attachments Ow! Ow! Ow!  
I grew up in a wild hood, as a hazardous youth  
with a fucked up childhood, that I used as an excuse  
And ain't shit changed, I kept the same mindstate  
since the third time that I failed 9th grade  
You probably think that I'm a negative person, don't be so sure of it  
I don't promote violence, I just encourage it c'mon  
I laugh at the sight of death  
as I fall down a cement flight of steps ahhhhhhhh!  
and land inside a bed of spider webs  
So throw caution to the wind; you and a friend  
can jump off of a bridge and if you live, do it again  
Shit, why not, blow your brain out, I'm blowin mine out  
Fuck it, you only live once, you might as well die now!

Chorus Three  
_Just pull the plug!_  
**Noa says that I'm a bad influence on my brother  
I say the Pegasus already made him messed up, I'm just addin to it  
They say I'm homicidal, dueling preteens' newest idol c'mon!  
C'mon duel as I do, go ahead get good and do it**  
_Just pull the plug!_  
**Noa says that I'm a bad influence on my brother  
I say the Pegasus already made him messed up, I'm just addin to it  
They say I'm homicidal, dueling preteens' newest idol c'mon!  
C'mon duel as I do, go ahead get good and do it**  
_Just let it gooo!_

**Kaiba, **_Joey_  
**My Dueldisk gon' make you take a the Millennium Rod to your hikari's wrist  
Make you masochistic, slap defeat in your calloused face  
like a card in a deck place the clip and cock it back  
and let it go until your eyes bulging out  
Ryou's arm so bad to sew you back would be a waste of stitches**  
_I'm not a "Role Model," Professor Hawkins, I don't wanna babysit kids  
I got one little girl, and Serenity is my business  
I put my last name first to make you pissed off _A/N: In the Japanese version, he calls himself Jonouchi, even though his real first name is Katsuya.  
_Where the fuck were you when Odion was paid to make look clueless?_  
**I make a couple statements on TV 'bout how crazy the monster sitings have got  
Your crappy TV reception makes me sound like I'm choking on snot  
And Mai almost got the same fate that Bonz' friends got  
I knew that "Just the Two of Us" would make you hate me this much  
**_And "Just the Two of Us," that ain't got shit to do with usÂ  
and our personal life, it's just an inside joke we like_  
**_So you can call me a punk, a pervert or a chauvinist pig  
But the funny shit is that I'm still here!_**

Chorus Two


	42. The Kiss

"I'm gonna kill this bitch," Malik warned.

"Im'a kill Tea

Odion's I'm going to fucking jail

Because I blame him for everything I do..."

Isis tried to placate her brother. "Malik"

"What " he answered.

"I dont know

I gotta realy really bad feelin about this "

"Onna would u shut the fuck up Isis you always gotta bad feelin, it's the Necklace

Thats her car right there "

"Aight let me park "

"Just park " Malik told her.

"Im parkin! " Isis retorted angrily.

"Turn the car off sis"

"Aight "

"Aight we wait "

"We wait for what "

"We wait till she comes out and then im gonna fuckin kill her " Malik said as simply as ever.

"Brother you aint gonna kill no one

What the fuck did you bring the Rod for "

"Man shut the fuck up onna

I just borrowed it back from Yugi for awhile, that's all"

"Malik dont point that thing at me "

"I can't even use its powers anymore sis', look "

(laughin)

"Brother, Ra I fuckin hate it when you do that shit"

"Yea but its funny as fuck "

"Your fukin around with the Shadow Realm is gonna kill me one of these days, i swear"

"Gets you everytime

Is that her? "

"where? "

"Right there bitch" Malik said.

"Oohh yeah... oh, Malik, remind me to tell Odion to wash your mouth out with soap"

"He'll be in jail. Aight get down get down " he insisted excitedly.

"Oh my brother... UU "

"Get Down! " Malik shouted.

"What the fuck you want me to get under the car? "

"Yo, who she walkin with " Malik asked.

"How the fuck am i suppose to know, you told me to duck down "

"Well you have the necklace...!! Its the Pharaoh

Did she just kiss him " Malik asked.

"I dont think so " Isis said doubtfully.

"Isis she just kissed him again" Malik informed her angrily.

"No she didnt "

"Shes kissin him "

"No shes not ," Isis disagreed.

"Gets out car " Malik commanded.

"Ohh crud... this won't go over well," Isis soothsayed. "Why does this happen everytime we want to go to the same pizza parlor as Tea does?"

"Come on ," Malik commanded.

"PHARAOH!"

Malik goes, Screaming & Running.


	43. Murder, Murder

A/N: I will only update this when I get 3 new reviews for the latest chapter, and 2 more reviews for any other chapters.

Sami- Thanks for telling me that I've improved.

CHORUS  
All I see is power power, my mind state - 2Pac  
Makes it too late for guards in tryin' to stop the crime rate - Swift  
All I see is power power, my mind state  
Power, power, power, all mine mine mine!Â  
(2x)

Left the Millennium Ring in the van, my aibou's in the palm of my hand  
Went up in England and shot a policeman  
Shot a peace plan of citizen bystands  
While the Necklace is in my hands, here's your life span  
For what your life's worth your souless body is twice than  
Grab a couple grand and live in nice land  
See I'm a nice man but the Pharaoh's destruction turned me to Satan  
I'm thirsty for a new body so bad I'm dehydratin'  
Hurry up with the cash bitch, I got a ride waitin'  
Stabbed a guard twice in the back when he tried escapin'  
I want the whole plot, I won't be denied then  
Maybe I need my my soul room straightened up  
Send in Ryou in a maid's dress to drain the blood down  
Wash up before somebody catches ya  
Or gets ya description an' sketches ya  
The eye was my spoils, but now that I get  
But I ain't set to flee the scene of the crime just yet  
Cuz Ryou's got a sister to feed  
And two shiny objects ain't enough to water the seed  
The best thing would be for me to leave England an' hit up Egypt's King  
And have the lady at the desk bring  
Money from the safe in the back, stepped in wavin' the Mac  
Cooperate and I can operate and save an attack  
This bitch tried escapin' the jack  
Grabbed her by the throat, it's murder she wrote  
You barely heard a word as she choked  
It wasn't nuttin' for her to be smoked  
But I slammed her on her back 'til her vertebrae broke  
Just then Tea's busting in, "LEECH! Listen to my friendship speech!"  
And I'm snoring inside but Ryou's mind is at ease 'cuz he knows how I've lied and done this and done that  
And bunch of other felonies from A to Z like spellin' bees  
So after my best friend got his soul back  
I bust shadow magic, his yami'll take the rap  
Hit the square in the chest, he wasn't wearin' a vest

CHORUS 2x

Left the house, pullin' out the drive backin' out  
Need a backin' out this Mai's Jag started blackin' out  
Pulled the Mac-10 out, stuck it in her face  
Shut ya yackin' mouth before I blow the brain from out the back ya scalp  
Drug her by her hair, smacked her up  
Thinkin' fuck it, mug her while you're there, jacked her up  
Stole her car, made a profit  
Grabbed her best cards from out the deck and offed them to Joey  
Who had no idea that I stole them, heck I could control him  
He's an idiot to be with even Ryou agrees  
Drove in thru somebody's yard, dove into they swimmin' pool  
Climbed out and collapsed on the patio  
I made it out alive but I'm injured badly though  
Parents screamin': "Son, go in and call the police  
Tell 'em there's a crazy man disturbing all of the peace!"  
Tried to stall him at least long enough to let me leap up  
Run in they crib and at least leave with some little cheap stuff  
Actin' like they never seen nobody play a shadow game before  
Ripped his cards, and taunted 'im with a metaphor  
About me being the darkness, really I'm just a whore  
I ran up the block jumpin' Mokuba on his tricycles  
And colliding with an 80-year old Solomon in the hospital  
Even Yugi agrees that his Grandpa is taken too many pills  
Ryou stood up and started to see stars  
Oops did I forget to mention that I gave his body SARS?  
Barely escaped, must-a been some dumb luck  
Jumped up and climbed the back of a movin' dump truck  
But I think somebody seen me maybe  
Plus I lost the damn Nintendo and I must-a dropped the Beanie Baby  
Fuck it I give up, I'm surrounded in friendship snoots  
Came out with a white flag hollerin' "TRUCE TRUCE!"  
Surrendered my Ring to Tristan who took off  
Wasn't me! It was Kaiba after he went and jacked off

CHORUS 2xÂ

CHORUS scratches to fade out


	44. Em Calls Paul

Eh, I suppose I got enough.

Sami: (I am listening to Eminem's Encore CD... right now. :) ) Well, I have a few more songs lined up... contrary to popular belief, I don't post these up as soon as I finish them. I have about five more to post up, at least. I'll take a look at Toy Soldiers, I promise. ;) I like that song as well. I especially like doing songs that I've actually heard, and as I've said before, I own the CD.

Background: In the original, this was a call to Paul Eminem made when he found out about Michael Jackson being upset about the music video for "Just Lose It". That's why I chose Pegasus. That, and the end part. Anyway, if you go to Windows Media Player and listen to the 30 second preview of this, it is soooo funny!

Hello Kaiba, It's Alister

I got your call about the Pegasus thing

And I know that he's not exactly 'straight'

What does that have to do with me?

Well I'll show him who's really 'sick'

Kaiba, 'the way you make me feel' with these calls

You should really take a look at the 'man in the mirror'

And tell him to 'beat it' because I 'won't stop till I clear this up

Do you 'remember the time' we were dueling in that abandoned castle?

Well I know that Pegasus is like Michael Jackson

But that doesn't matter because:

Because I can't stop loving him' and I hate plastic surgeons 

And I hope they all fucking die!

How do you like that?

And I like him, I like him a lot

I want to touch him but I can't

Excuse me, I'm taking a shit

Sorry

Anyways, call me back

I have this idea about how I want to end the episode

So, hit me when you get this message fucker

Oh, and by the way

No I don't have a new card +SEAL OF ORICHALCOS+ (goddamn it rafael) 


	45. My First Single

Ohh!  
Yeah!  
So much for first duel on this one

Verse 1  
Joey's the lablel  
Domino is the stable (neighing sounds)  
That the puppies come out erra  
Of course we're about to stir up  
The recipe says to mix water with syrup  
It's Mr "watch me call you a rat"  
A Chihuahua is a type of rat, rat?  
Well I don't give a rat's ass He used to be CEO  
Until our friend Kaiba, boy, did he decide to let go  
Kaiba you wait until we meet up again  
Stupid I'm stealing KaibaCorp for everything you've ever said  
I'ms here for the money an' for the duelin' show  
Ready get set, let's go   
Here comes the Hitotsu-me Giant just starin' at ya all quiet  
Like them Stone Soldiers, I told ya I'm bout' to blow  
'em all away So look out below, geronimo, Joey Wheeler's in Domino  
Got my Skull Dice on a roll, around and around they go  
When will it stop? I don't know  
Tryna pick up where Series 1 left off  
But I know anything's possible  
Though I'm not gonna top Yuugi  
I am on top of the game  
That just is not gonna change  
Long as I got the midget on my team  
I'll get away with cheating  
I'm Pegasus he's like my Eye  
All of our best cards we hide  
In a safe, locked them away  
Hey Té you Better watch what you say  
Just when you thought you were winning  
Them strategems got you spinning  
You swear to Ra you was playin  
Whether or not you was a part of the game  
Gosh I wish I coulda been told the same so I might  
not have stumbled and felt dumb while my sister lost her eyesight

chorus  
And this was supposed to be my first duel  
But I just screwed that up so,  
Whatever, let's all have fun let's mingle  
Yell at Mai and smack Miho  
This was supposed to be my catchy little jingle  
That you hear on your radio  
I bashed my brain against lots of shingles  
Miho's Ho Oh Oh Oh No  
erra Oh Ah  
erra Oh Ah  
erra Oh Ah  
erra Oh Oh Ah Ah  
Oh Ah Oh Ah  
Oh Ah Oh Ah  
Poo Poo Ca Ca

Verse 2  
Mara Mara Marik swallowed some generic sleeping pills  
And woke up in bed next to his best friend Bakura bare naked  
chicka chicka chicka ..  
Yugi just turned 16 and used a fake id  
To sneak in V.I.P. to see Peggy  
Hehehehehe, to be so young and naive  
Oh what I wouldn't give to live so young and care free  
Duke and Tea's parents must be so tickled to cherish  
the knowledge that their kids are grade 'A' idioets  
Hickory Dickory derr digga  
Look at me summon my Time Wizard with these words  
You are a jerk or just jerk chicken  
Or Chicka chicka chicka chicka jer jer jerkin the chain  
5 jerks in a jerk circle  
Or is it a circle jerk or wait a minute  
What am I sayin, allow me to run it back and rewind it  
rrrbb lemme ask you again  
Am I just jerkin the chain  
Am I beserk or insane  
Or am I just one of them flimsy amateurs  
Writin' an application to get an invitation to the tournament of the year  
Solomon Motou lends me pornos  
Where someone keeps tiltin the lens at an angle  
Chicka Chicka  
Just recently somebody just discovered  
Valon and Mai videotapes of them cussin'  
When they were just mouseketeers in the Doom club /Note: Somehow, the Doom members are called muskateers in the Japanime. Don't. Even. Ask./  
And dusted them and went straight to The Domino Source with them  
Cause they coulda sworn someone said Nuh-  
And then tried to erase and record over it  
But if you listen close enough to it you can hear the  
Uh Uh and then the come-to-find-out-it-was-Valon  
Sayin 'I'm done-uh!'  
Come on this was su-

chorus  
-pposed to be my first duel  
But I just screwed that up so,  
Whatever, let's all have fun let's mingle  
Yell at Mai and smack Miho  
This was supposed to be my catchy little jingle  
That you hear on your radio  
I bashed my brain against lots of shingles  
Miho's Ho Oh Oh Oh No  
erra Oh Ah   
erra Oh Ah  
erra Oh Ah  
erra Oh Oh Ah Ah  
Oh Ah Oh Ah  
Oh Ah Oh Ah  
Poo Poo Ca Ca

Verse 3  
Any opinions or somethin you just wanna get off your chest  
And address it about my lyrics I'd love to hear it  
All you gotta do is pick up the phone and just dial up this number  
It's 1-800-I-am-a-Peg'sus-fan-you-know-I-just-love-to-stare-at-him  
And if someone picks up you can rave all you want about me  
Just type in your number back and follow it by the pound key  
And I'll be sure to get back  
As soon as there comes a day that I fall off with Yami  
Wake up gay, make up with Té (Hey!)  
So /pickle/ a chicken, lick a chicken, suck a chicken,  
Beat a monkey, yell at a dog like a crowing cock(?) bawka-bi-kaw  
Or suck a /"pickle", and lick a /"pickle"/ and eat a /"pickle"... censorship by SS/  
And stick the Flameswordsman's sword in your mouth  
I'm done you can kiss off  
kissa-kissa-kiss offf!

chorus  
And this was supposed to be my first duel  
But I just screwed that up so,  
Whatever, let's all have fun let's mingle  
Yell at Mai and smack Miho  
This was supposed to be my catchy little jingle  
That you hear on your radio  
I bashed my brain against lots of shingles  
Miho's Ho Oh Oh Oh No  
erra Oh Ah  
erra Oh Ah  
erra Oh Ah  
erra Oh Oh Ah Ah  
Oh Ah Oh Ah  
Oh Ah Oh Ah  
Poo Poo Ca Ca

burping noise

"Ew. That's just gross."

A/N: I just had to add in that Tea quote at the end... Anyway, I'm not sure if I got the number of reviews I asked for, but I'm updating everything lately, why not this to? Please, please press that sleek, attractive button labelled "go" and review this chapter. Please, _please!_


	46. Puke

Mecha Scorpion- Hey, what's up? Actually, not only have I _heard _the song, "Mockingbird", I own it on CD. And have listened to it. Again. And again. And again. It's one of my favorites. I actually have the parody for that song already done. After this chapter comes "Evil Deeds", and after that comes "Mockingbird". I update them in the order that I write them. THE MORE REVIEWS THE MORE UDPATES! (crazy breathing) Anyway, yes. I love that song. It's very pretty. Yet, as a pretty song by Eminem, it is sad... All his pretty songs are sad. Thanks for reviewing, man. :)

spewing

There I go, thinkin of you again

you dont know how sick you make me  
you make me frickin sick to my stomach  
everytime I think of you I puke

you must just not know-ow-ow-ow-ow-ow-ow-hoooo  
you may not think you you do but you do  
everytime I think of you I puke

I was gonna take the time to sit down and help Tristan write Miho a little poem  
but off a the dueldome would probably be a little more, more suitable for this type of song, whoa  
You've the bluest eyes and dumbest speeches I've seen, all I can thinka  
40 cards's just aint enough to put some ink ta  
so forget it I'ma start right here I'll be jus be brief a..  
Tristan was right when he dumped ya  
I knew I shouldnt go an encourage you   
I knew you'd talk to much but what do I go an do  
You're running at the mouth again, just like you always do  
oooooooo-ooooo-ooo-ooo  
now I'm sitting here with your name on me  
I can't believe that the tattoo place has employed Peggy  
my next girlfriend now her names gotta be Tea A/N: For rhyming reasons, please pronounce it like the drink. Thank you.  
shoooo-oooo-oo-o-ot  
if you only knew how much I hated you  
for every mind-numbing speech you've ever put us thru  
then I wouldnt be standing here crying over you  
booo-ooo-oo-oo-oo-hoo

you dont know how sick you make me  
you make me frickin sick to my stomach  
everytime I think of you I puke

you must just not know-ow-ow-ow-ow-ow-ow-hoooo  
you may not think you you do but you do  
everytime I think of you I puke

I was gonna take the time to sit down and write you a little letter  
but I thought a song would probably be a little better, instead of a letter  
that you'll probably jus shred-up yed-up?  
I stumbled on that smiley face yesterday an it made me stop and think of  
how much of a waste it'd be for me to put sum ink ta  
a stupid peice a..  
paper I'd rather let you see how  
much I hate frickin' you in a free for all  
you're a lousy duelist and everyone knows you always lie  
I hope you get to hell an marik sticks the Rod in ya eye  
You are real sick in the head you liar we know you always lie  
die-ie-ie-ie-ieee  
but please dont get me wrong I'm not bitter or mad  
it's not that I still love you its not cus I want you back  
it's just that every time I threaten you you always want me back  
baa-aaa-aa-a-ack  
but what can I do I'm all out of moves  
now I guess I jus move on I have no choice but to  
give up the duel though I say I never lose,  
puuuu-you-you-you-uuuke

you dont know how sick you make me  
you make me frickin sick to my stomach  
everytime I think of you I puke

you must just not know-ow-ow-ow-ow-ow-ow-hoooo  
you may not think you you do but you do  
everytime I think of you I puke

spewing


	47. Evil Deeds

_Ok, so, this is kind of a mix of Malik and Odion's perspective. _

_Seto's Other Sister- The day of what? The anniversary of what? The day the first booger was picked? I dunno. .. Thanks for the compliment! I hope you'll read and review some of the others if you get the chance._

_Oh, and to Mecha Scorpion, "Mockingbird" is coming up next...! (I responded to your review in Mistaeks.)_

Intro Talking  
Ra please forgive me for what I do… For I know not what I've done…

Chorus  
Mother please forgive me for I know not what I do.  
I just never had the chance to ever meet you.  
Therefore I did not know that I would grow to be  
my father's evil seed and do these evil deeds.

Verse 1:  
Momma had a baby and her head popped off. (Echo)  
My fatha don't want me, next thing I know I'm getting dropped off. (Echo)  
Ring ring ring went the doorbell and the Ishtars on their front porch. (Echo)  
But they didn't want me neither, so they left me on someone else's lawn. (Echo)  
Til somebody finally took me in, my great aunt and uncle Ishtar and Larles. (Echo)  
They were the ones who were left in charge.  
In elementary they came to me and read this scroll. (Echo)  
It went a little something like "Mary had a little lamb. (Echo)  
Ishtar had a Satan spawn. (Echo)"  
Daddy, why do they keep saying this? I just don't understand. (Echo)  
And by the way, where's my mom?

Chorus  
Mother please forgive me for I know not what I do.  
I just never had the chance to ever meet you.  
Therefore I did not know that I would grow to be  
my father's evil seed and do these evil deeds.

Verse 2  
Predominantly. Predominantly. Everything's always predominantly.  
Predominantly mine. Predominantly yours.  
But what about me? Where does that leave me?  
I guess I'm in between predominantly both of 'em.  
I think if I hear that fricking word again I'mma scream.  
Wild lashings you gave to me. What do I look like, a comedian to you?  
Do you think I'm kidding? Do I look like some kind of idi-  
Wait a minute, shoot, don't answer that. Why am I so misunderstood?  
Why do I go through so much BS, it's such BS, touch this sister.  
Woe is me. There goes poor Malik again,  
whining about being a tomb keeper and the prestige and  
his sorrow he's always drowning in  
and the mom that he never had and how his childhood was so bad  
and how dad was a masochist and his bro how they go at it.  
Man, I'd hate to have it as bad as that Mr. Malik claims he had it.  
Man, I can't imagine it. That little rich poor tan bastard needs to  
take those items and start lambasting him.  
Man, if I only one of those…  
You wouldn't be so near morose…

Chorus  
Mother please forgive me for I know not what I do.  
I just never had the chance to ever meet you.  
Therefore I did not know that I would grow to be  
my father's evil seed and do these evil deeds.

Verse 3  
Evil deeds, while I plant these evil seeds.  
Please release me from these evil demon  
I never had any of this stuff planned, dad, please believe.  
I don't wanna be Satan's spawn.  
Never got the chance to say I'm sorry.  
Now look at all the pain I caused.  
Daddy please, why can't I go out in the sun again?  
What did I do that was so bad to deserve this?  
Everything coulda been so perfect, like life in a fairy tail  
I'm bout to be hoist up in the air.  
all around me, there's people everywhere.  
I don't even know what it feel like, cuz they know me. I'm in despair.  
All I wanna do is go to the mall and take my chibi on that carousel.  
With out this crowd everywhere I go. But life is like a merry-go-round.  
Now here we go. Now dosie-do. Now curtains up, the show must go.  
Now ring-around-the rosie. The shows over. You can all go home now.  
But the curtain just don't close for me. This ain't how fame is supposed to be.  
Where's the switch I can just turn off and on? This ain't what I chose to be.  
So please, God, give me the strength to give me what it takes to carry on.  
Till I pass Odion back the rod, the necklace's on. My song is gone.

Chorus  
Mother please forgive me for I know not what I do.  
I just never had the chance to ever meet you.  
Therefore I did not know that I would grow to be  
my father's evil seed and do these evil deeds.  
I said mother please forgive me for I know not what I do.  
I just never had the chance to ever meet you.  
Therefore I did not know that I would grow to be  
my father's evil seed and do these evil deeds. (Echo)

Outro  
Oh! Yeah, last one, baby… Let's go… EGYPT!


	48. Mockingbird

Yeah   
I know sometimes things may not always make sense to you right now  
But hey, what did I always tell you?  
Straighten up little soldier  
Get tough and don't let anybody get to you  
What you crying about?  
You got me

Mokie I know you miss your mom and I know you miss your dad  
Well I'm gone but I'm trying to give you the life that I never had  
I can see you're sad, even when you smile, even when you laugh  
I can see it in your eyes, deep inside you want to cry  
Cuz you're scared, I ain't there?  
Big brother's with you in your prayers  
No more crying, wipe them tears  
Big brother's here, no more nightmares  
We gon' pull together through it, we gon' do it  
Noa Kaibas gone crazy, aint he?  
Yeah but he loves you Mokie and you better avoid him  
We're all we got in this world  
When it spins, when it swirls  
When it whirls, when it twirls  
Two puzzle pieces in a maze  
Sennen puzzled, in a daze  
I know it's confusing you  
Big bro's always on the move, and I'm always on the news  
I try to stay with you on Christmas but somehow it seems  
The harder that I try to do that, the more work gets piled on me  
All the things growing up that had to be, that you had to see  
I really didn't want you to see but you saw just as much as I did  
We did not plan it to be this way, Gozaburo and me  
But things have gotten so bad between us  
I don't see us ever being near each other ever again  
Like we used to be before we were really free  
But then of course everything always happens for a reason  
I guess it was never meant to be  
But it's just something we have no control over and that's what destiny is  
But no more worries, rest your head and go to sleep  
Maybe one day we'll wake up and this will all just be a virtual reality.

Chorus  
Now hush little baby, don't you cry   
Everything's gonna be alright  
Stiffen that upperlip up little lady, i told ya A/N: I'm leaving this in. Ha ha, ha ha! Take that Adina. :D  
Big brother's here to hold ya through the night  
I know mommy's not here right now and we don't know why  
We feel how we feel inside  
It may seem a little crazy, pretty baby  
But i promise I'll make it alright

It's funny  
I remember back one year before I came into the money  
We'd wrap the Christmas presents up  
And stuck 'em under the tree and said some of 'em were from your stepdad  
Cuz daddy wouldn't buy 'em  
I'll never forget that Christmas I sat up the whole night crying  
Cuz daddy would rather work than try to be a family  
But his job was to keep the love out of our hearts  
And at the time every game that we bought  
Always kept getting stolen from that butler who bought  
Nothing for his own kid, he'd just use what he had gotten from us  
Tryna find a secret hiding place so our brains wouldn't bust  
We kept our hidden treasures in it till someone broke in and stole them  
And I know it hurt so bad it broke your heart  
And it seemed like everything was just startin' to fall apart  
Gozaburo and I was arguin' a lot so I had him pushed back  
Out the window, glass-hacked, to the pavement like that  
And we bought our toys back, had that butler slashed  
That's when I took over the company and you'd wish to be with me  
And you ran up to my office one day just to see me  
But I had to work, my little brother had to leave me  
Then you started seeing me on the T.V. and you didn't like it   
You can't understand that I had a plan but I guess I still struck out  
Our lives rolled on along, I lost a game and I lost it  
And it all happened too fast for either one of us to comprehend  
I had to leave to learn to understand what went wrong for awhile  
Cuz all I ever wanted to do was just make you proud  
But now I'm sittin in this empty house, just reminiscing  
Lookin' at your baby pictures, it just trips me out  
To see how much we both have grown, it's almost like we're grown-ups now  
Even though deep down we'll just never understand how, other people can be happy  
Mokie I'm talkin' to you, you, I'm still here  
I like the sound of that, yeah   
It's got a ring to it don't it?  
Shh, mom and dad are only gone for the moment

Chorus

And if you ask me too   
Big brother's gonna buy you a mockingbird  
I'mma give you the world  
I'mma buy a diamond ring for you  
I'mma sing for you   
I'll do anything for you to see you smile  
And if that mockingbird don't sing and that ring don't shine  
I'mma break that birdies neck  
I'd go back to the jewler who sold it to ya  
And make him eat every carat don't fck with dad (haha)


	49. Go To Sleep

A.N: I'm sorry but I had to edit out the ENTIRE chorus, he he. Sorry about that. But I mean, if you knew/know the chorus then you would/do know that it's still horribly offensive, even in an M-rated story. Sorry.

Anyway, to make it up to you, here are the next songs that are coming up, okay?

Marshall Mathers

Guilty Conscience

Hope y'all like them… and hope y'all review this! --;;; This really doesn't have enough reviews considering there's 40-plus chapters…

_Seto_  
I ain't gonna eat, I ain't gonna sleep  
Ain't gonna breathe, til I see, what I wanna see  
And what I wanna see, is you go to sleep, in the puzzle again  
Permanently, Yugi's being hurt 'cos the past never ends  
For me, it just wouldn't be, sufficient enough  
Cuz we, are just gonna be, enemies  
As long as we duel, I don't ever see, either of us  
Losing on purpose, where we can agree  
There ain't gonna be, no handicap, duelin wit me  
You lecture on my behalf, then me, no speak-japanese  
So we gonna duel, and keep on duelin, unless  
You're gonna agree, to play a game with me in the flesh  
And settle this with our decks, and you're gonna see  
A dragon unleashed by me, that you've never seen  
And you're gonna see, this duelist drop all his cards  
I see you Mokie, and thanks, but me need no help  
Me do this one all by my lonely, I don't need fifteen of KC's employees  
When I see you, I'm seeing you, me and you only  
You never fret, but best believe you have wide eyes  
When you're proclaimed the loser, what a surprise  
Come on, runt, show me, pick me up, throw me  
Lift me up, hold me, just like you scold me  
You was gonna do, that's what I thought, you're too short  
Can't lift me up, duel me, let's go, I'll win this too!

_Chorus_

_HAS BEEN EDITED OUT_

_Marik_  
We got you groupies, nervous  
On purpose, to hurt your focus, you'se not champion's, you'se worthless  
You're not the elite, you're a circus, you've no appeal, please  
Brooklyn accent, you use words, cool heard, slurred every other word  
You're annoying little boys who watch your friend lose  
Technically we oughta mummify him and lay him in dirt when  
You strut with a DuelDeck overseeing the Earth  
Marik Ishtar, my power's birth  
And as I grew, my hated birthed a curse  
So we can put down the curse, take it to the surf  
Put your decks down, Mai's the first on the hearse who  
Is pretentious with her strategy  
And as I breathe, and you be re-deceased  
The world believe you deceived just to speak  
You'se not the streets, you'se the desk  
Use not your chest homie, use a vest  
Before two's choose ya rest, you chose death  
Six feet deep, homie, that's the debt

_Chorus_

_Mokuba_  
Hey mutt, I'ma be the referee, walk down the streets  
I'ma stay blazin Domino wit dragons bowed at my feet  
Stalk on the beat, walk on your feet  
Understand my pain, the rain ain't sleet  
Peep how you're moving, peep where you're going  
Seto don't seep, I sleep not knowin  
But I'ma keep growing, watching him get larger than life  
Mai's gone, but the same one that started the fight  
He be knowing how Joe get, when he gon bite  
Tried to show him he's a turd, he's on a leash for life  
Grand champ, and my Blood Line is tight  
Cuz it's all good, it's all right  
Yugi's homies tried to holla, but couldn't holla back  
Cause the Shadow Realm swallow'd everything in the room  
Blood Line, and, we trades card for crack  
Damn Seto, why'd Yugi have to do you in like that?

_Chorus_

_Eminem_  
All you motherfuckers, take that!  
Here, take this too, Tea! Uh, Uh, Uh, Uh, Waaaaaahoo  
We're killing all you motherfuckers dead, all of you  
Fake ass duelists! No more press! No more press!  
Rot, motherfuckers, rot! Decay, in the tomb, bitch, in the motherfucking dirt!  
Die nameless, bitch, die nameless! No more fame!  
Ahhhhhhhhhh! Hahahaha  
Yo Marik, come on man, Mokuba, let's go, haha


	50. Marshall Mathers

I don't know why, but I really like this one. Enjoy. -

Yuugi  
You know I just don't get it  
Last year I was nobody  
This year I'm world champion  
Now everybody wants to come around like I have to do duel them  
Heh, what do you want from me, my Dark Magician?  
Get the fuck out of here

Chorus One: Eminem

You see I'm, just Yuugi Mutou (Yuugi Mutou)  
I'm just a regular guy,  
I don't know why all the fuss about me (fuss about me)  
Nobody ever noticed me before,  
all they did was bully me (did was bully me)  
Now everybody wanna run they mouth  
and try to play cards with me (play cards with me)

Yuugi  
Yo, you might see me dueling, you might see me at school  
You might see me at school with Anzu Mazaki  
chewing her head off in the cafeteria with my Grandpa's false teeth  
hollerin at her cause the blue-eyed bitch won't quit yappin  
(Friendship, BLAH BLAH) Or leanin out of the shop, with a sturdy broom  
Sweeping up dust in front of the house that I live in   
Lookin for the spirit's past, my hair looks ridiculous  
yellow and red and black like I don't see what the big deal is  
Triple-colored hairdo that costs more than what's in my wallet  
Upset, cause Honda and Jou just missed all this  
Watchin me beat Pegasus, let Jou get rich off 'em  
and get dollars that shoulda been there's like they switched wallets  
And amidst all this time freezing and Shadow deuls

I had to sit back and just watch and just get nauseous  
and walk around with an tiny tv with my Grandpa on it

startin things like some 10-year-old skinny Kaiba ("Shut up, Mokie!")  
I'm anti-Kaiba bros and Maximilian  
with instincts to diss Tea, don't get me started  
These fuckin brats can't play and Tristan's garbage  
What's this bitch retarded? Gimme back my hair gel  
All I see is Pegasus on videos smiling  
Whatever happened to straight men and sounding straight?  
Whatever happened to catchin a good-ol' fashioned  
passionate ass-whoopin and gettin your shoes cape and your shirt tooken?  
Mai Valentine sniffed perfume quite a bit

Fan boys/girls make me sick  
And I can't wait 'til I catch all Kaiba shopping for clothes in public  
I'ma love it.. (hahaha)  
Seto Kaiba don't like me (uh-uh)  
Said some shit in the tournament to spite me (yup)  
Then went and dyed his hair just like me (hehe)  
And my best friend wanna swear just like me  
and run around screamin, "I'm a true duelist, come on and fight me " (nah nah)  
I think I was put here to conquer the world  
and destroy your little 8-year-old boy or girl  
Plus I was put here to put fear in faggots who steal my Root Beer  
and call themselves "mutts" cause they look queer  
Mai Kujaku and Shizuka Kawai  
Claimin Domino, when y'all live twenty miles away (fuckin punks)  
And I don't lose, I'll knock you fuckin faggots the fuck out of the arena  
Ask Mokuba about the duel we had when he snuck out  
after we found out who it was and he bugged out  
(AHHH!) Gave up and got mauled by Kimo's hair, blaow!  
Look at Tea runnin her mouth again  
when she ain't seen the Shadow Realm, send her back again   
And I don't need help, from Joey, to beat up Rebecca  
who's eight and may try to have Teddy kick me to Mecca  
"Starfish," you damn right, Starfish

I'm not just a plain fish that gets beat up by sharkfish!

Chorus Two: Yuugi

Cause I'm, just Yuugi Mutou (Yuugi Mutou)  
I'm not a sports guy,  
I'll stare you down if you talk about me (you talk about me)  
Come and duel me on the streets alone  
if you gamers doubt me (gamers doubt me)  
And if you wanna run your mouth  
then come take your best shot at me (your best shot at me)

Yuugi  
Is it because you love me that y'all expect so much of me?  
You little groupie bitch, get off me, go fuck Joey  
Now because of these purple eyes I've got

and this fucked up hair that I've got, I've gone pop?  
The quiet life just spunned around and did a 360  
Now Devlin dissed me and says I'm a big sissies  
"Oh, he just did bribed of Pegasus,  
so now he thinks he's too big to play a new game with me"  
My Grandpa wants to sell my Millennium Puzzle  
Probably because I solved it, and he was confuzzled A/N: Love that word. :D  
Of course, where'd you think I picked up the habit of borrowing porn?  
All I had to do was go in the kitchen and look behind the jar of moldy corn  
Who's on that page, Mai Valentine or Tea Gardner?

It doesn't matter you /several seconds of silence/ faggot! A/N: I had to put in the slashes so you could distinguish it from the rest of the line. They used brackets and asterisks, and those don't show up on this site anymore. Sigh…  
Talkin about I forgot most of "my" past  
Spirit's just aggravated I'm cuter than him (KAWAII!)  
So tell me, what the hell is a midget to do?  
For every million I buy, another duelist challenges me  
Gamers fightin and fussin over who wants to sit next to me in school  
All the sudden, I got 90 some best friends (Hey it's me!)  
My grandpa's friend's granddaughter who never seen me  
or even bothered to call me until she saw me on TV  
Now everybody's so happy and proud  
I'm finally allowed to be seen in front of my house  
Hey-hey! And then to top it off, I walked to the newsstand  
to buy this cheap-ass game magazine with a food stamp  
Skipped to the last page, flipped right fast  
and what do I see? A picture of a duel with Kaiba in the past  
Okay, let me give you magazineers some help:  
uhh, here – DUEL DISKS, DUEL DISKS

Now your magazine shouldn't have so much trouble to sell  
Oh well, I'll even buy a couple myself

Chorus One (2X)


	51. Guilty Conscience

sound of static

announcer  
Meet Joey, sixteen years old.  
Fed up with life and the way things are going,  
he decides to rob a liquor store.  
("I can't take this no more, I can't take it I don't want to go home")  
But on his way in, he has a sudden change of heart.  
And suddenly, his conscience comes into play...  
("Dad said he's thirsty, I gotta do this.. gotta do this")

Ryou  
Alright, stop! (Huh?)  
Now before you walk in the door of this liquor store  
and try to get money out the drawer  
You better think of the consequence (But who are you?)  
Silly, I'm ob'vusly your conscience

Bakura  
That's nonsense!  
Go in and gaffle the money and run to your little sister's crib  
And borrow a damn dress, and one of her blonde wigs  
Tell her you need a place to stay  
You'll be safe for days if you shave your legs with an sharp DM card

Ryou  
Yeah but if it all goes through like it's supposed to  
The whole neighborhood knows you and they'll expose you  
Think about it before you walk in the door first  
Look at the store clerk, he's older than Yugi's Grandpa

Bakura  
Screw that! Do it anyway, sew this stitch!  
Can you afford to blow this shit? Are you that rich?  
Why you give a care if she dies? Are you that bitch?  
Do you really think she gives a fuck if you have kids?

Ryou  
Mate, don't do it, it's not worth it to risk it! (You're right!)  
Not over this shit (Stop!) Here's a biscuit (Hey thanks!) A/N: XD

Don't even listen to Bakura, he's bad for you  
(You know what Ryou? I don't like your attitude..)

sound of static

("It's alright c'mon, just come in here for a minute")  
("Mmm, I don't know!")  
("Look Tea..")  
("Uh…!")  
("Yo, it's gonna be alright, right?")  
("Well OK..")

announcer  
Meet Yami, five-thousand-sixteen years old. ("Heart of the cards!")  
After meeting an annoying girl at a rave party,  
he finds a knife and gets creepy in a obfuscated sewer  
Once again, his conscience comes into play... ("Oh shoot!")

Bakura  
Now listen to me, while you're listening to her  
and looking bleak, I slipped this in her drink  
Now all you gotta do is press your finger against this groupie's temple…

(Yo! This girl's only sixteen years old  
You shouldn't take advantage of her, that's not fair)

Yo, look at her mouth.. is it still running? (Uh huh!)  
Kill this bitch right here on the spot bare  
Til she dies out and no one knows how she got there  
(But, ain't you ever seen that one movie Kids?)  
No, but I seen the bluey starring Pegasus!  
(But, do you want to get hauled off to jail?)  
Man forget that, hit that stuff raw and then bail..

sound of static  
pickup idling, radio playing

announcer  
Meet Tristan, a sixteen year old human drill hammer.  
After coming home from a hard day's work,  
he walks in the door of his apartment  
to find his best friend's sister making out with Duke Devlin  
("WHAT ON EARTH!")  
("Tristan!")

Ryou  
Alright calm down, relax, start breathin..

Bakura  
He-llo, you just caught this bitch cheatin  
While you at work she's with some dude tryin to get off!  
SCREW lecturing her to death, PULL HER VOCAL CORDS OUT!

Ryou  
Wait! What if there's an explanation for all of this?  
(What? She tripped? Fell? Landed on his lips!)  
Alright Bakura, maybe he's right Tristan  
But think about the friendship circle before you get all crazy

Bakura  
Okay! Thought about it, still wanna nab her?  
Grab her by the throat, grab her best friend and kidnap her?  
That's what I did, be smart, don't be a retard  
You gonna take advice from somebody who slapped PEGASUS!

Ryou  
Wot 'chu say? (What's wrong? Didn't think I'd remember?)  
I'll kill you Bakura!

Bakura  
Uhhh-aahh! Temper temper!  
Ryoukun? Mr. I'm too cute so no way?

Mr. R.B. comin' straight outta school y'all better make way?  
How in the fuck you gonna tell this man not to be violent?

Ryou  
Cause he don't need to go the same route that I went  
Been there, done that.. aw forget it…

What am I sayin? Shoot em both Trisy, where's your gun at?


	52. She's the one

Yami   
Seto Kaiba

Asshole

Kaiba   
Any duelist wit cards, we got cards too

They're stronger, ready to outgun you

It's too late my deck already outgunned you

You was around, you knew the outcome too

Let's play, lemme show you what Duel Monsters is

Break the deck, I'm showin' you what pain is

Please, I'm reppin' a 'd' duelist

Where your cards, you duelin' me groupie

Seto Kaiba's the name, everyone knows knows  
And gamers know, dealin' wit me gamers know

Hey Mokuba, isn't school over yet, you wanna ride

Hey, let's go see Yugi, you wanna drive

Beside, I ain't got no new stuff, you freebie-loader  
You wanna suga-daddy, go get you an Solomon  
I got money, I'm just here to bug you girl  
Can't get none, but you know I love you girl  
yo 

Chorus:

Kaiba  
She the one that wanna ride on blimps, huh  
Same one that ain't really got friendshit, huh  
She want her hair done, then get her nails done  
Go to Kame Shop, and just ask for Solmon, huh

Yami   
She the one that ain't really got friendshit, huh  
The little bitch that really aint got tits, huh  
Gossipin slut with a chest enhanced,  
Wouldn't dance if you aint pay for her breasts implants

Yami   
Anybody wit hikaris, we got hikeris too  
More ruthless, and ready to outduel you

About 5 friends, waitin outside for you

And your colors inside are coming outta you

Get me drunk, and I'll feed Yugi anything you can think  
Wattup Miss. Bitch  
(Yo what's up with the ring, you married?)  
Shit, I'm still mingling, bitch  
I just wanted to scream, this is the only finger that's it  
Wattup with you, Cecelia, you married?  
(Naww, I'm divorced)  
Of course you are, you little fuckin trailer park whore  
(Trailer? I don't live in no trailer. I live in a mobilization unit, for your information)  
Bitch, I got a deck, wanna play?

Hold still, so I won't have to use my magic cards berk

Fuck, pumped so much power into my monster that when I attack

You're gonna have to grab on, your hair blowin back

But I ain't payin any of your importunate medical bills

Are you playin? Be a true duelist- Tea what you sayin?

You trying to talk some friendshit, while I got one arm free

You want me to load my deck with nitro glycerin?

Chorus: 

Kaiba  
Wattup squirt, this is for you and your girlfriend  
You bank-head, up in America we Duke Devlin  
Assholes get guns and flashed those  
Never ever go to Domino, we blast those

Yami   
Hi, my name is...

Kaiba   
Kaiba  
I'm the king  
I 'av money, I 'av jewels, everything  
Ayyo, you with the white hair, is it yours?  
I guess so, got a reciept- paid for  
Pegasus, got anymore lipstick? I'm sick of red  
Get a perm, you nappy head, you chicken head  
I know you crazy, I ain't trying to take the crazy out   
Things about you to tell about, mellow out  
I'm the one that be makin the duelists say "How"  
Gettin the best cards, and making the gamers say "What"  
Some of you losers, hated on me and got sick  
Any DuelDisks that got bugs, not this   
yo

Chorus 

Joey  
Any fightas wit guts, we got guts too  
More than crazy, only want to outdo you   
Damn, too late, we going after you  
Go get more friends, you gonna need more than three  
Joey Wheeler, here to rep the east, New York- I'mma rep my streets   
Militainment- we soldiers y'all  
Me, Yami, and Kaiba got you cornered y'all  
The only duelists you see on World's Wildest Police Chases  
Gamers that go wild only during court cases  
Bitches go wild when they see us signing their autographs  
We never discriminate, we love all races  
She the one that I got love for  
Money she won't get, I assure  
She the one that think she hot  
Damn, have you seen Mai, she is hot  
High maintanence- that's her style  
God I can't her out my mind, when she smile  
But ain't no need to worry bout nothin  
I got ten crushers like her, I ain't lyin  
The only thing i buy is some good clothes for her, cuz her school uniform is tacky  
Kaiba got me on this, remember the name- Joey Wheeler

so yo

Chorus

Kaiba  
You tramp  
Why you still listenin?  
Don't you see, I'm dissing you  
Fade me out, why would you ever play me out?  
I'm cool  
What do yall want from me?

(Repeat till fade)


	53. Paul Encore

Note: To all of those who read _Malik's Answering Machine, _I am finally, after months and months, going to update chapter 13! However, I'm waiting to receive 20 reviews today before I do it. So get to it! 

Dartz

HÃ© Alister, this is Master Dartz  
Hey, listen to me, I just got a call from Pegasus,  
And you're probably not going to be surprised but well,  
Pegasus is extremely upset about the Luring-Kaiba plan,  
and well,  
I mean he's outraged so well I don't know what he's going to do,  
but we have to talk about how we will handle him.  
Well Oh yeah any way,  
Valon told me that uhm he heard a rumor that you got a new mini-skirt uhm,  
I know it's probably not true but I just need to talk about that,  
so uhm send me a bell.  
click


	54. Paul Slim Shady

Sami Ryou's Hikari- Half the fun of reading these is knowing who is saying which lines, and trying to imagine them saying that on the anime... XD

* * *

Joey, What's goin' on, this is Tristan Taylor here, faithful pal o' mine. 

Listen, I, er pawed through the rough copy, of, your deck and, er, you know, I

just gotta be honest with you, er, could you use less monster cards a little bit because,

there's only so much I can explain.


	55. Freestyle Cage 'Dis

Sami Ryou's Hikari- Yeah, I think so too. :P Now, if only I could spread this knowledge to my mom, but nooo… XP

Author's note: Not really sure about the name here... but what I do no is, as for a freestyle, this rocks. I believe that the subtitle is correct...

Kaiba   
If I take over as C.E.O.  
I'm renewing the staff to get my step-dad T-Oed  
And hiring all girls as secretaries  
If I don't like you, I'll snatch you outta your desk  
While you're workin and pull your right to my office and fire you  
I'll take you straight to the janitor's closet  
Cut you up, make you bleed on the floor  
And then tell you to mop it  
Three cups of coffee while I'm driving to work  
Strutting in my office saying bling bling, just to sound like a jerk (Listen!)  
It's probably all cuz I ain't nice at all  
I just like to walk through the halls, stop, and fire them all  
And be second best after I just fought through withdrawl  
(Hop in the car Rebecca, I just bought you a doll)  
The Duelist Kingdom Tournament is comin  
Plus the music is pumpin like a blood from Pegasus' eye socket  
I go to school everyday  
So it's no wonder how come your whole career  
Makes you sound like such a dick that I would say  
Whether it's one deck or one card  
I'm probably the only one here that Mai doesn't make hard  
It's Seto Kaiba and Mokuba, it's only us  
The rest of y'all are just stuck in the middle wit Pegasus


	56. Scary Movies

**Nobody reviewed my last chapter, and yet I'm up at 1 in the morning working on this chapter even though I have a major test today. Pitiful life I live.**

**Anyway, I decided to end this story on Chapter 75, if I can make it that far. I'm sure I can. **

**Please review! (gives you the wobbly eyes)**

**Yami Hi, I'm Yami!  
Yugi Hi, I am not an alcoholic.  
Yami Y'all wanna make a movie?  
Yugi What..  
Yami We got the film right here**

Yugi  
What?  
Yeah I'm one of them gentle guys  
Buck if I really hafta, I really slap ya  
King of Games who you namin your children after (what?)  
Gimpzoidal partners, whose grammar hammers the hard shit  
Duel with your heart with, content, yo who wanna start with  
Duelists, Hikari and Yami is comin soon  
When Kaiba sees me, he runs back into his room

**This shit is written, in everyone's eyes I'm the illest duelist spittin (what?)  
Leavin all of you dogs shittin puppies  
I gotta diss you, my deck has the God cards**

**I'll shock and shake you, forget sharing with you (what?)  
Six percent, of y'all decks is any good  
Cards with , Dark Magician stinks like dick (what?) A/N : Yeah, I edited that.**

**Ushio acted bully, and beat peeps up for some fast yen  
My deck is fully, plenty of monsters packin semi  
Speak Dartz; you paying people? Rhymin about it is the sweet part  
You can't be street smart with a cheap heart  
Yugi Motou, a short midget with hurt feelings (what?)  
I keep illin, my yami willin to keep killin (what?)  
Fuck traps, a lot of them all is just acts  
Trust what – your faith all all out of wack**

**You messing with me and you'll get bust back at**

**And after I've wiped the floor with your butt, you get laughed at**

**And I'ma spit thunder (what?) stick to my God cards  
Duelists with no faith are always one-hit wonders  
What? Big hair, that's why when the spirit comes out, your clique stalls  
I'ma midget, I'm just need to drink more milk, that's all (what?)  
Your riled, shouting, "Duel!" Then I beat you**

**Then you get all POed and start claiming I cheated you**

Yami and Yugi  
Y'all want drama? Wanna make a scary movie?  
Duelists poppin' in and disobeyin' all the rulies

**You can slice me with these holograms and barely move me  
We hard-hittin, directin and starrin in it  
Y'all want drama? Wanna make a scary movie?  
Duelists poppin' in and disobeyin' all the rulies  
You can slice me with these holograms and barely move me  
We hard-hittin, directin and starrin in it**

Yami  
The one man on the planet that'll ride a horse through the Grand Canyon  
Hop out off of him and for Rebecca's grandpa start grandstandin  
Any man plannin to battle will get his soul snatched out of this dimension  
Then Bakura'll dress up like you and steal your pension  
I'm headed for Pegasus's castle, I'd rather be dead or in jail  
Kaiba, sniff this, it'll send you to jail  
Cause any duelist that Pegasus chooses to hire

**Is gettin takin advantage of like Mokuba Kaiba (Leave me alone!)  
Came home after Kaiba threw cards at me  
Screamin to Grandpa (GRANDPA!)  
With three cards stickin out of my pant leg  
Forget Celtic Guardian, give me Archery Girls**

**Yes you faggot I like girls (DUH!)  
And duelists seem to be anywhere that I might be  
You duel knowin you'ra fool  
You act up and I'm sending you to the Shadow Realm**

**Then bringing you back and sending you again  
If they don't like my deck, fuck em  
Losing Yugi struck me harder then gettin hit by a Mack truck  
And now we're back up on  
And any half-assed known tomb thief to trespass  
Better be ready for the second Battle City (Ding! Ding!)  
So tell the medic to bring the insulin for Yugi and quickly (Hurry up man!)  
I'm sicker than a Kaiba dedication to Joey  
I'm free-fallin feet first off of the KaibaCorp Blimp  
I'll stampede your chest till you confess that I'm the best pimp  
And when I'm down to my last breath  
I'ma climb the KaibaCorp building and stand on the P  
And do just that**

Yami and Yugi  
Y'all want drama? Wanna make a scary movie?  
Duelists poppin' in and disobeyin' all the rulies  
You can slice me with these holograms and barely move me  
We hard-hittin, directin and starrin in it

Yami Hikari.. the hikari..  
Yugi Uhh, when the hikari meets the hikari.. yo..  
Yami The yami  
Yugi Take the yami with the yami  
Yugi Put em together  
Yami What? 5'0" and 5'5"  
Yugi Two times.. Yami Yugi.. That midget you love


	57. Macosa

Macosa

A/N: Wow! I haven't updated this for a long, long time! Well I'm glad I'm back. Maybe now I'll start listening to some more Eminem.

Rare Hunter  
Talking  
I'm allowed to steal cards whenever... whenever I want...  
This is a tournament...  
Lemme draw a card first...  
Your, turn...

Duke  
95 of all duelists love Yami's butt  
And everyone loves Yug' so much it just makes me nuts  
You get your deck cut, I'll kick your butt in four turns  
Dunk your head in shame, use your bad hairdos for mops  
Gay or straight, trust me, Pegasus does date rape  
He taped over his wedding with Kaiba eating cake  
Lost like Kaiba, so we both stuck Yugi to dry ice  
Good to roll twice 'fore y'all catch me usin' trick dice  
I throw Tristan and Joey out of the car with skills  
Nobody knows I take diet pills  
I do my hair every morning until 3  
Tea, I know you want to cheerlead

Instead of being at Yugi's house

Grandpa staring at your bust, he's still the same as he ever was  
I'll get my crown in a crowd of groupies  
Who'll laugh at Joey when he's wearing a two piece

Leave me alone or ride in my car

Everyone says my driving's Bizarre  
I lost again and again to  
Yu-gi, Yu-gi, Yu-gi-oh  
Been duelin' since I was five  
Then my mom died

And I died inside because I miss her pies

Yu-gi, Yu-gi, Yu-gi-oh

Yugi, Yu-gi, Yu-gi-oh

Yu-gi, Yu-gi, Yu-gi-oh

Yu-gi, Yu-g', Yu-gi-oh

Mokuba  
Kaiba hates Joey so much he gave him poison ivy

Put 'im in the hospital, dressed up as a nurse and gave him a poison IV  
I would've done something but I got hit by a skunk  
Everytime I came near Seto, he'd suicide jump  
I listen to rock  
While resting with the chicken pox  
In a cardboard box  
Give away free DuelDisks while Seto dines on calimari

Dueling Yugi is his only hobby, I'm sorry

Duke can't have Pegasus, I'm more his type

Lure me with popsicles and candy lice  
I'm Mokuba, that little kid you wanna rape  
I have a frog in my throat and still cheerin'

Joey  
When Yugi dies, who has the right  
To do everyone a favor and kill the guy?  
And to keep his grandfather from getting high?  
Say Yu-gi, Yu-gi, Yu-gi-oh

I'll kill the guy who tells my sis' a lie  
Leave him paralized and agonized  
'Cause Tristan keeps touching my sister's thighs  
Say Yu-gi, Yu-gi, Yu-gi-oh

Tea  
Yu-gi, Yu-gi, Yu-gi-oh

Yu-gi, Yu-gi, Yu-gi-oh

Yu-gi, Yu-gi, Yu-gi-oh

Yu-gi, Yu-gi, Yu-gi-ohPegasus  
Wanna do all this duelist business

Eye stealing, all that  
My Millennium Eye to fallback…

On… set like I was Liu Kang for Kombat  
While reading comics and eating stew

And listening to "Stacey's Mom" thinkin' its cool  
I can touch your mind, you fool

See, Mr. Ishtar, I want to talk like you (you fool)

The name I(2) has Funny Bunny as a mascot (Note: In the Japanese version, Industrial Illusions is usually shortened to "I2" in the manga.)

Eating an apricot, out in a sandlot  
I'm more successful than Kaiba's father ever was, or could've been  
Especially since he always had to pee  
So you see, now? (Get it? See?)  
Even if you duel like Kaiba you couldn't "Take The Crown Home"  
Call me on my Funny Bunny phone

Cecelia is gone, I drink wine aloneBakura  
Marik and I had to flee in haste from bein' chased  
'Cause we launched fireworks in the Pharaoh's place

I climb onto KaibaCorp and hang-glide off of the I

And put pepper spray in Mokuba's eys  
My man-eater bug eats gators up 'to their teeth

It'll eat your bladder until it gets full

Skipped school, had to go rob tombs, it's cool

Put a whoopee cushion under Joey's stool  
I dream that I'll be six thousand years old

And still steal credit cards, purses, and lots of billfolds

I'm from the country where the weather's always real hot

And you can get killed on the spot breaking pots with the Pharaoh's face on it  
I'll be in my palace 'til down

Slicing the Pharaoh's heart into an octagon

While Ryou reads about Kyo and Jimon (Note: It's from Samurai Deeper Kyo)  
Yu-gi, Yu-gi, Yu-gi-oh  
Pegasus, Yami, and Kaiba

Tea, and Joey, Noa, and moi

Osiris, Slifer, and Ra  
Yu-gi, Yu-gi, Yu-gi-oh

Duke  
Leave me alone or ride in my car

Everyone says my driving's Bizarre  
Just buckle up or you'll be thrown out and get scarred  
Yu-gi, Yu-gi, Yu-gi-oh  
Been duelin' since I was five  
Then my mom died

And I died inside because I miss her pies  
Yu-gi, Yu-gi, Yu-gi-oh

Yu-gi, Yu-g', Yu-gi-oh

Yu-gi, Yu-g', Yu-gi-oh

Yu-gi, Yu-g', Yu-gi-oh  
Yu-yu-yu-yu-yu-gi-oh


	58. Maxine

A/N: I need to update this more. I guess I haven't been listening to a lot of Eminem… I've been listening to a lot of Sean Paul and the Ying Yang Twins. But my friend Lauren was listening to Em' on her Ipod this morning, and it made me really want to listen to my Eminem cd. That isn't why I'm updating this, though. I'm updating this because it deserves to be updated. This song is called Maxine, and it features Danaun Porter and 3. Who are they? I have no idea. But they're in this song. So whatever. Now go! Go and engage yourselves with imagining the impossible as you read this: Kaiba saying "What up?" and Yami calling Weevil "Weev-man," which wasn't really based off of the original song.

Weevil! (Phone Rings)

"Hello?" Weevil answers.

"Can I speak to Weevil?" Kaiba asks.

"Yeah this is me what's up?" Weevil replies.

"What up?" Kaiba asks.

Weevil, not recognizing the voice at first, asks, "Who dis?"

"Kaiba," says Kaiba.

Weevil's eyes flicker with recognition. "Yeah what's up?"

"What are you doing?" the CEO asks.

"Nothing, just on a boat," Weevil tells him.

"Huh?" Kaiba utters.

Weevil says again, "Nothing, just on a boat."

"Why?" Kaiba wonders.

Weevil tells him, "I don't know, thinking about some cheating to do."

Verse 1: Yugi

I know this bug fiend Weevil who's unpopular in school  
He memorizes bug facts but tells you that he's cool  
Plenty fall for his act, don't be a retard  
He asks every duelist that he takes on to bet their best card  
If you fall for it you're sad, 'cause he ain't subtle  
You're in trouble, Lemme burst your bubble  
When you step away son, he puts a smiling face on  
Looking innocent, he'll ask for your dueling deck  
Give it to him or he just might try to kiss you  
If you have rare cards, otherwise he won't look at you  
But when you find a card, that you don't rec'nize  
And you look up and see that damn sparkle in his eyes  
Don't come crying to me, cause I ain't trying to hear it  
While your fighting your heart out trying to win it  
(Weevil!)

Verse 2: Rex

Sometimes I wonder, what's your purpose? In DM that is  
To defeat every brother and get one of his cards, shit  
You never get high, got ant farms at home and studyin' bugs every night  
You say you're top-notch but you.. can't.. even.. fight  
And win when you ain't sabotaged a deck, givin' them duelists heck  
Entomology, whatever your reason even is to be  
You say you wanna duel me, but I know you're gonna cheat  
You keep eyeballing my pocket  
I keep one hand on my deck 'cuz you're not looking at my wallet

Verse 3: Yami

I met this guy last week, he was a freak, and she spied me  
So I stepped on it and then told my homey  
Joey, chill on the side and then watch him duel  
Big game over there and take notes, while I beat this bugger  
I stepped to him first I cleared my throat and said "Hey Bitch..  
Haven't I seen you before?", looked back at my man  
Turned around and got my deck snatched out of my hands  
And said "Oh it's like that?"  
He said he just got beat up by a bully and shit  
He started crying, and asked me to forgive him and shit  
He said his name was Weevil, so I told him I wanted to duel  
He wiped snot on his sleeves and said that'd be cool  
Got to Yug's crib and called him that night  
We got into a good conversation that's when he asked me when we'd fight  
I said "Weev-man check this out,  
Meet me at Death-T I'll be there and you'll find out"  
Got to the arena he was there  
He lookin' smugger than before, saying ain't no time to spare  
I said "Hold up, and stop hurrying, that's not honorable"  
What the fuck are you doing?  
So I put on my dueling gloves, took out my deck and started shuffling  
He regarded my confidence  
I drew my first hand 'n looked at 'dem cards  
Drawn a good card and thought about putting it to work  
Before I played it he said  
"Yami don't get mad but there's something that I gotta tell your ass"  
I said "What is it, you're evil? Happens all the time"  
She said "No I forgot to tell you, that ripped up Yugi's cards"  
I left KaibaWorld

"Hey, Weevil"

"What"

"You thinking about messing with his deck" Kaiba asks.

"Yeah probably," Weevil says.

"Probably? What you mean?"

"You know, if I can get my hands on it," Weevil explains.

"You don't need no damn invitation, he can't say no to people anyways, I heard you did some shit."

Weevil laughs. "What you, what you hear I did?"

"I heard you ripped up Exodia," Kaiba accuses.

Weevi is laughing. "Who told you that bullshit?" he asks.

"Yugi Motou, he wouldn't lie," Kaiba says.

"Well if that's the case, he did it then."

"Oh for real, it's like that?"

Weevil is laughing. "Well I ain't did shit, so he ain't did shit, and if he did, he ain't get that idea from me, I ain't joking around with you either."

"Fuck that, I ain't dueling with you," Kaiba declares.

"No, see.."

"You did that shit, I ain't gotta talk with you"

"Hold on, why it ain't even like that," Weevil tries to plead.

"I want ya'll to get caught, cheating.." Kaiba says.

(Weevil is laughing as the phone hangs up)


	59. Paul Eminem Show

Malik, it's Odion… Listen,  
Ishizu just called me and she said you're in the Kaiba's theme park,  
pointing your rod at people like it's a slave market.  
I told you not to bring the Millennium Rod around,  
like an idiot, outside of your home.  
Don't bring the rod outside of your home you can't use it anymore.  
Leave the fuckin' rod at home!


	60. Tonight

Hey hey hey! Chapter 6-0. I feel cool. Anyway, this is a song that I found on Windows Media Player. It's pretty cool. Less curse words than the norm, you see, and it's all about people having fun. ...Sorta. ;)

Eminem  
Tonight

Tea Singing:  
Tonight, Tonight, Tonight, Tonight, Tonight

Verse 1:  
Yug's giving mad love, he's offering hugs  
Marik's thugs, Ryou's drugs, Joey's jobs, Tea's jugs  
So here's a toast to gratuity  
gullibilty, undeserved apologies, huh  
We travel in packs and bind twits via friendships  
To find babbling Pegasus, mind tricks  
See Malik's rod is also a knife for ending strife between him and  
The mysterious chap who bothers me when I'm in the act  
Of sweeping the dust still outside the game shop  
Talksmack and you will end up with your deck beat  
Ishizu buried the God cards, Malik has a tattoo on his back  
It sucks because it's ugly and it's where he can't scratch it  
Yugi all I ever do is duel once or twice  
Watch you be nice, protect you and your friends  
Back in the Puzzle when the party ends  
So tonight I'm dropping your cards in the ocean  
Hitting on Tea, watch you apologize then

Chorus:  
Tea Singing:  
Tonight, Tonight, Tonight, Tonight, Tonight (blends in with lyrics)

Yami:  
Cause Yugi came here to apologize tonight  
He don't wanna fight, he don't want no one feeling uptight  
Cause Yugi came here to apologize tonight  
Accept all the crazies hope that everyone's feeling alright  
Cause Yugi came here to apologize tonight  
He don't wanna fight, he don't want no one feeling uptight  
Cause Yugi came here to apologize tonight  
Accept all the crazies hope that everyone's feeling alright

Verse 2:  
Ayo, fangirls are like tarantulas, they cling to ya  
Following you like you were a television star  
But I can handle this, I'm the reason Yugi got so far  
Taller, deep voice, taking care of undeserving duel fighters  
I think living was never meant for me  
Experimentally I found a way to get around magic  
Yugi and I tested it and we had it  
By using a polymerization of mind shuffles and determination  
You couldn't see me with the Millennium Eye  
Everyone wants me to die  
Step in the arena and you get beat but bad  
Talking that stuff in a big huff, guarding your back  
Come duel me and you get smacked as much as he eats  
When I duel I'm true so I can't ever lose to a freak like you  
Every turn so when I win it you never resent it  
I'm forever the winner, come up with strategies, I'll never be beat  
You can not win when I cleverly set it

Chorus:  
Tea Singing:  
Tonight, Tonight, Tonight, Tonight, Tonight (blends in with lyrics)

Yami:  
Cause Yugi came here to apologize tonight  
He don't wanna fight, he don't want no one feeling uptight  
Cause Yugi came here to apologize tonight  
Accept all the crazies hope that everyone's feeling alright  
Cause Yugi came here to apologize tonight  
He don't wanna fight, he don't want no one feeling uptight  
Cause Yugi came here to apologize tonight  
Accept all the crazies hope that everyone's feeling alright

Verse 3:  
Yami M is heading skyward  
For those who thought that I would let you win and blow up like Alcatraz island  
I've got grueling dueling capability all in me  
With the agility to escape Tea's cooking  
So get your cameras and watch me, how miraculous  
I look for all you punks and showed you all how whack you was  
I meant it as a dis, cause you don't posses the pizzazz as this  
I'm dangerous enough just as Yugi is  
Better apologize to him, prick, you know how it is  
I'm cruel to the fool  
Who fails to recognize my Shadow Realm, curb your desire  
Egyptian studies show that I'm cynical  
There's no one who's identical to me besides my friend Yugi  
I'm sure the evil people can agree  
That he's disarming, smile's so charming  
Make you forget you hates you  
'Cause his voice is so damn sincere  
And lets you know the only person that was nice was here, just be like

Chorus:  
Tea Singing:  
Tonight, Tonight, Tonight, Tonight, Tonight (blends in with lyrics)

Yami:

Cause Yugi came here to apologize tonight  
He don't wanna fight, he don't want no one feeling uptight  
Cause Yugi came here to apologize tonight  
Accept all the crazies hope that everyone's feeling alright  
Cause Yugi came here to apologize tonight  
He don't wanna fight, he don't want no one feeling uptight  
Cause Yugi came here to apologize tonight  
Accept all the crazies hope that everyone's feeling alright


	61. Remember Me?

_You know... feel free to review whatever chapter you want. Y'know... I (heart) reviews. And stuff. So... yeah. Please review!_

"Remember Me?"

_card deck being shook up and sprayed several times_

_Bakura_  
Remember me? ("I have come for the Pharaoh")  
Remember me? ("I have the Millennium Ring")  
Remember me? ("I want his power")  
Remember me? ("I summon Diabound")

To own this I'm the best, you're retarded  
Cause I grab the knife and throw you DOWN, like Syndrome  
Hide and pickpocket through the masses, steal without boundaries  
which qualifies me for the term "king of thieves"  
Without no warning, I do things that's controversial  
Like I'm not, the one you wanna battle, see  
cause I'll send you to the Shadow Realm; I'm the one  
that got "Banned From the Chapital" -- heavy hemomaniac  
Cut myself watch me make a hole in my hand  
Loopholes-in-the-security, I'm comin in grand  
Sharp tips in my chest, the Millennium Ring

_Bakura_  
Remember me? ("Mortal fools are so fun to terrorize!")  
Remember me? ("Man-Eater Bug!")  
Remember me? ("Mortal get out of my way")  
Remember me? ("I-call-Dark Necrofear!")

Peasants that take no for an answer, get told no  
Yeah I take all the gold and the guards moan, "No, no, no!"  
Life a bitch that'll fuck you if you let her  
Better come better than better to be a competitor  
this vet is ahead of,  
Inveterate competiters, feuds enfettered unfettered  
A maniac instead-a the quiet pale cherub  
Settling ancient vendettas with the shadows unweathered  
Evidence? NOT MINE! My other's instead-of  
He's got the soul of the King of Thieves in him, love it or hate it  
My host got a hole in his hand that was made me  
I'm the illest robber ever, I told you  
I get more fangirls than them other bishies Total  
Want duel, sucker? PBBT! You're gonna regret that decision  
My name should be "Can't-Believe-That-Guy-Stole-That-Corpse"  
Probably sayin, "He ain't really bad", but I'm killin the Pharaoh  
Duel to death, fuck whatever's left, in the you're deaf  
So think what I'ma do to you, have done to you  
Got lackeys on horses who'd do that shit for a blunt or two  
What you wanna do, Pharaoh? Speak up, buster  
'Til your guards cuff us, we'll cause ruckus and drop cards like blockbusters  
'Round the clock rustlers, you cannot touch us  
I'm got palace guards wantin me dead, wantin my head  
You think it could be somethin I said? echoes

_Bakura_  
Remember me? ("Bakura? I'm not Bakura!")  
Remember me? ("Bakura ja nai!") /A/N: Means "I'm not Bakura." He says this a lot in the Japanese version./  
Remember me? ("I am a thief and a stealer of souls!")  
Remember me? ("I'm Bakura!")

When I go out, I'ma go out stealin'  
I don't mean when I die, I mean when I go out to the palace, stupid  
I'm tryin to clear up my fuckin' image,  
so I promised my fuckin other half  
I wouldn't say "fuckin" for six minutes  
(click Six minutes, Bakura, you're on)  
Should be Pharaoh of the land, he made me this angry man  
So I played along, dueled and let Ryou out  
I may be wrong, I keep thinkin these crazy thoughts  
in my soul room, but I'm stuck with a sweet Ryou  
("Is he really as sweet and kindly as he lets on?")  
Went to Kaiba's, and I broke in the back window  
and stole two loaded date files and both of his trenchcoats  
Sick sick dreams of dueling scenes, two duelists, sixteen  
with at least 40 cards and 1 star chip each  
And their friendship puppies giving a speech  
And 'Kura gets blamed in the Pharaoh's speech to fix Egypt's streets?  
FUCK THAT! PBBT! All that'll be left of you is your petalus  
you'll re-appear in the SR to see your worst fear, AND Pegasus  
After that, Zork, finds where your at, stares at you behind your back  
(What the fuck you starin at, weirdo?)

Don't you remember me!  
Remember me!  
Remember me!  
REMEMBER ME!

_Remember to review._


	62. Final Thought

_People chanting Kaibaland_  
_Dueling cards folding/tearing_  
_Shuffling_  
_Soul room door open and slam shut_

_More shuffling_  
_DuelDisk activating_

_sigh_


	63. When The Music Stops

I was working on this, and then looking back at some of my reviews, and I realized that Sami Ryou's Hikari had requested this song awhile ago. Anyway... I'm planning to crank out a lot more, fast, if I get the reviews. I did the last three chapters within a span of a few days, so if I focus I can work it. (Is it worth it/Let me work it!) Missy Elliott is cool. Anyway, just wanted to say that I am reading those reviews... Anyway, I really like the job I did on Ryou's part in this rap. -

"When The Music Stops"  
(feat. D-12)

_Yami:_  
_Echo_  
Shadows, reality, sometimes it's hard to tell the difference  
But we as duelists have a responsibility to those caught in between  
Psyche!

_Yami:_  
If I were to die murdered in cold blood tomorrow  
Would Yugi feel sorrow or show love  
Or would it matter  
Can never be attracted to material things  
Duels for me to feed off  
I'm not corporeal  
But theres way too much at stake for me to be fake  
There's too much for Yug's plate  
And "he" came way too far in this game to turn and walk away  
And not play or just let me play  
What does aibou take me for? a joke? he smokin crack?  
Before I help again, I'll beg Bakura to stab me in the back  
I died once after i get crowned, ran myself in the ground, had to wait 5,000 years to be let out  
I'm tryin-a duel this one just for the heart, years past the five-thousand mark  
Ya'll steady tryin to show me up  
Ain't gonna do nothin but blow me up  
Puzzle equaling can of whoop ass, just say "Yu-Gi-Oh"  
See me take over, pull my deck out, the strategy I'll use only Yugi knows  
Duel with me now, c'mon, let's see how you play  
Talk is cheap, Joey Wheeler if you're really feeling froggish, leap  
Yo Yug', you gonna let him get away with that?  
He tried to beat you, you can't let him skate with that  
Man I hate these fools, they can't duel  
It's crazy how the get schooled  
When we confuse the shadows with real life when the duel stops

_Bakura:_  
There ain't no changing 'ny of my ways  
If so you woulda tried  
The only way I'm leavin my host is suicide  
I should've died winning, showed up and left my enemy's mind spinning,  
Got beat but I'll finished him  
I'm every Pharaoh's favorite arch-enemy.  
Physically fitted to be the most handomse albino with skills  
I'm willingly Egypt's Dillinger working in the dark dilligently  
I'm not what you think  
I appear to be evil  
Mentally endangered  
I can't keep my light away from a razor  
I just want my revenge and power  
I wish in Egypt I'd had a grenade to squeeze tight to awake neighbors for acres  
I murder you  
My village's slaughter turned me into a mad man, son of shadows, Pharaoh, I'm magical  
I'm allergic to dyin, you think not? you want to try? You can stab until I fall  
When the duel stops 

_Kaiba:_  
I was happy having a new dad at first,  
Thought money would make us happy but  
It only made our lives pain worst,  
It hurts when you see your brother turn their back on you dawg  
When you ain't got nothing left but your brains and your calls  
And you're stressed from the calls of your businessmen  
Beggin' with they hands out  
Checking for your shares when they're selling  
When it ain't, that's the end, no laughs  
No friends no girl  
Just workin' you hard till your head spins and then  
_Screech_  
Damn!  
_Crash_  
Yo slam into the wall and you fall  
Out of your mind, trying to make it along  
Better to lose it all in a pool of alcohol  
If my funeral's tomorrow, wonder who would even come when the duel stops 

_Yugi:_  
Let's see how many time's you are loyal,  
When I call out looking for you,  
With a duel coming on I can't handle  
I'm revved up, who said what would lead from friendship to dependency  
With my Puzzle i'm sure 'nuff geared to win  
Braggin about how I'll never give in, when all of the attacks shower him  
Liar, if i was the spirit, i'd run while given the chance  
Understand i can enchance the spirit of man  
Death itself, it can't hurt him, just the thought of dying unaccomplished that really  
Irks him, I ain't worthy to speak thoughts of cheap talk  
Be smart and stop trying to walk how he walks before we spark  
Hug the floor while he plan out the duel of your life, forget the tourney and the mic  
He'd rather fuck Tea with a knife, then duel and pretend that's what I'm like  
I'm high hype poppin' shit in broad day light I'll be a gonna at night

When The Duel Stops

_Ryou:_  
Mind raiders, turn souls in cages  
Boxed in and time seems wayward  
wrist to razors  
He don't want war, he want the end  
In the dark my cries all fall deaf to his revenge  
Proove to him I'm alive, get my whole soul  
Quashed like an impure thought  
Let myself loose and try to release  
The more I breach, the more he entombs  
This one-way street, this is hardcore blues  
Put the shadows to test stealin all the items (darkness)  
Or send me to the hospital betcha all ya'll will  
Run when he gon' pop, you better drop when the duel stop 

_Marik:_  
Darkness has changed my life in so many ways  
My backs been all messed up since the 5th grade  
My dad told me not to leave the halls  
But I said fuck that G  
Now Odion's in peril  
Those blows were strictly 'cuz of me  
Fucked up dress sense  
Listen to Ishizu  
Odion, who gonna tell me I ain't been in the light  
My skin was so white  
I make dirty deals at night  
I fly down streets on my bike  
Odion on the side  
While the spirit hides  
Childhood had me grindy and griddy  
Bakura, i bleached my hair  
And wore belly shirts  
Ishizu told me to just come home  
Now Odion's on the ground  
Broken spirit and a fractured pride  
Voices in my head, i'm going in shock,  
I'm reaching for the rod but the duel stops

_Bang_


	64. Business

Most of the songs I write these for, I haven't heard. So I was pleased the other day when I found this song on the Internet, a while after I had written it. Of course, it sounds better as Slim Shady intended it; but this was amusing to write, nonetheless. Especially the beginning part. " Marshall, sounds like an SOS..."/"Holy wack, unlyrical lyrics Andre, you're fuckin' right.!"

Intro:  
Kaiba:  
Mokuba, sounds like an S.O.S.

Mokuba:  
Holy wacky dueling decks niisama, you're fucking right!

Kaiba:  
To the Kaibamobile, let's go!

Tea:  
Kaiba!  
Kaiba!

Kaiba:  
Duelists and Dogs!  
It's time to duel!  
Hurry, hurry step right up!  
Introducing the champion of the game, his name is...

Tea:  
Kaiba!

Kaiba:  
You wouldn't wanna be anywhere else in the world right now  
So without futher ado, I bring to you...

Tea:  
Kaiba!

Verse #1:  
Your bout to witness dueling in its  
Most purest, most ancient form flow, almost flawless  
Most shortest, most honest, known gamer  
Chip off the old block but here comes the real hall of famer!  
Looks like Batman, brought his own Robin  
Oh god, Sadam's got his own Laden  
With his own Blue Eyes jet, Kaiba's the pilot  
Set to blow soul room doors off their hinges  
Ring, Puzzle, Rod, Eye, Necklace  
VRRM VRRM Yeah, here I come  
Blue Eyes is inches away from you, here fear none  
Dueling is in a state of 911, so

Chorus 2x:  
Let's get down to business  
I don't got no time to play around with this this?  
Need a dogcatcher in town, let's put that dog down  
On these clowns, can i get a witness?

Mokuba:  
Hell Yeah

Verse #2:  
Yami gotta move fast, gotta duel miracles  
Gee willycores Yami, holly bat syllables  
Look at all the bullshit that goes on in Domino  
When I'm gone time to get rid of these rare hunters  
So, play with your friends, while I do what I do best  
You ain't even impressed no more, you used to it  
You're all wet, nobody gets close to you  
Everybody knew who I was before they knew you  
The most hated by your friends all those who say it hate it  
On the television and  
blow the screen up So much  
you could see my make up  
But I wear no such thing  
I'm not a female with good looks who cooks and cleans  
It just means so much more to so much more  
People when you inventing and you know who for  
The stocks must go up, so I'd like to welcome ya'll  
To Kaiba and Mokuba's gameland fantasy  
C'mon, now!

Chorus 2x:

Verse #3:  
It's just like old times, the dynamic duo  
Two siblings, why panic?  
You allready know whos capable, the two caped heroes  
Go from orphans to millionaires and take it all  
You can even place a request, the most feared duet  
Since our parents, we can put your career on russian roulette  
And never even see me in my trenchcoat busting a sweat  
Parents stepping over parents just to rush to the arcade  
Just to get to see a champion who breathes so freely  
Help you ease through defeat, and be so breezy  
Man, how can running a company be so easy  
How can one tree stalk become so leafy  
Turn on these beats duelist's dont see me  
Believe me, Joey and Yugi  
Your gonna agree when they leave, dialogue will be cheesy  
Left along until Gozabouro needs me  
'Til we broke kids, get weird and he disappear out the window  
Nothing but clowns in your group  
But we, ain't messing around round here  
Yo Moki!

Mokuba:  
Whuddup?

Kaiba:  
Can I get a hell yeah?

Mokuba:  
Hell Yeah

Chorus 2x:

Outro:

Kaiba:  
So there you have it folks

Tea:  
Kaiba!

Kaiba:  
Has come to save the day  
Back with his brother Moke  
And to remind you that cabals do not pay  
Because

Tea:  
Kaiba!

Eminem:  
And Mokuba are here to stay and never go away  
Until our dying day, until we're old and grey

Tea:  
Kaiba!

Kaiba:  
So until next time friends  
Same blue eyes, same dueling fire  
Goodnight everyone, thank you for coming  
Your host for the evening

Tea:  
Kaiba!

Kaiba:  
Oh, hah


	65. Can I Bitch

'Ello 'ello! This chapter took much longer to write than intended. It took me forever to do about half of it, and then I did the second half today. In any case, enjoy, and please, review!

_in a high falsetto voice_  
Uncle Kaiba!  
Will you tell us a bedtime story?  
_regular voice_  
Here we go...

Now once upon a time a long time ago  
There was a man named Dartz who lived down below  
Who liked to hallucinate he was an Atlantean hero   
He had this idea about this large monster head  
So three silly little fans they were mislead  
When Dartz posted the info on the internet  
"Alister, Valon, Rafael, we're gonna make some cash  
Grab the dueling cards and the world we will crash"  
Hey Kaiba, would ya care to bare witness to  
Pegasus, the fiend, trying to kiss yer  
annoyin' ass-kissin' little brother blister  
Mokuba, hair long enough to be your sister  
And in this corner, we have the mister  
Not havin' it, it's the mad sinister  
Bakura with his bag of tricks for  
this little antagonist faggot dick-suckin'  
Funny Bunny fan from the Islands  
I'm 'bout to rip that Sennen piece out of your eyelids  
You pedo I ain't wanna have to kiss ya  
Mokuba, where's he keepin' you? I miss ya!

_Chorus_  
Dartz-i-bitch, oh Dartz-i-bitch  
Where for art thou Dartz-i-bitch?  
Please tell me what happened with  
Atlantis, yeah what happened with  
Dartz-i-bitch, oh Dartz-i-bitch  
Are you from America  
Japan or just a janitor  
From Domino? Oh Dartz-i-bitch

Now at first I ain't really understand magic  
Picture me for a second and imagine it  
Chillin' in the Kaiba-Mansion and relaxin'  
When all a sudden Peggy's mug shot's across the scanners  
It's Dartz-a-bitch on some "Magic's Real" shit  
It creeped me out at first. Man this is sick  
For him, being a huge fag, Mokuba  
Gets him harder than Joey Wheeler's abs  
Dartz don't even write to me, instead he  
Had Amelda write a bunch of corporate letters straight to me  
The first two letters you were sellin' me shit  
Like you like me, like any other regular shameless plug  
The third letter you ask how come I ain't buyin'  
None of the messages at Kaiba Corp that you left me  
The fourth letter: "Seto, you really startin' to upset me!"  
The fifth letter told me you were comin' to get me  
The sixth letter there's a you im'tated Peggy  
This short girly shirt wearer's really tryin' to kill me!   
So I went back and read the first few letters that said  
Some shit about a message you left  
Oh shit, that's not an "E" that's an "A"  
Amelda wants to leave me a "massage," he's gay!  
Right away I'm on the phone with Yami  
We got another! (KaibaI'm on the way)

_Chorus_  
Dartz-i-bitch, oh Dartz-i-bitch  
Where for art thou Dartz-i-bitch?  
Please tell me what happened with  
Atlantis, yeah what happened with  
Dartz-i-bitch, oh Dartz-i-bitch  
Are you from America  
Japan or just a janitor  
From Domino? Oh Dartz-i-bitch

So in two seconds flat Yami's at my crib  
The funny thing is we both know where this fag lives  
And neither one of us have American citizenship  
Shit. Yami, wait a minute that's it  
All we gotta do is use my Blue Eyes White Dragon Jet

We can fly over the border "Let's go" _WOOSH!_  
So we're off to America and we're gainin' speed  
_BOOSH!_ (What was that? Oh) Mouto Yugi  
Fuck It, keep goin' no time to waste  
Wait, backup hit him one more time in case  
Okay .. fuck now his hair's caught in the plane  
Oh well, we're only 30 thousand miles away  
Meanwhile me and Yami are tryin' to debate  
Whether teamwork's the charm or it's power all the way

And tryin' to figure out what happened to Duke Devlin's game  
"It couldn't have fell off that hard" Ain't no way  
"What happened to the way you was duelin' when you was scandalous  
That Mokuba turned into a television specialist"  
Yugi raps with his regular voice _BOOSH! BOOSH!_  
_BOOSH! BOOSH!_ (What was that?) Tea Gardner

So we pull up to the arena where she last was spotted  
Her mouth was still movin' but her ass was rotted  
She kinda smelled a little like Rex Raptor  
If I stick her with the Sennen Rod she's done for  
So I stabbed her twice, kept jabbin', Christ  
She won't die, no matter how hard I smack

He's like Bakura, he keeps comin' back  
But she won't shut up I cracked her jaw  
Shut up, Te' quit scoldin' us!  
Zip up her damn lips! Make her shoulders touch!  
Somethin'! Take away her make-up  
C'mon till the meter reads 9-9-9-  
ty-nine percent of Joe's fans are blonde  
'Te c'mon answer me girl respond!  
Tell me 'bout the sun rain moon and stars  
Anything, even 'bout the heart of the cards!  
Raw to the floor, raw like Joey and his dogs   
Bite another card from Kaiba's deck!  
Suddenly a stub of a dead man's arm  
From a midget reaches out from under the car  
It's Yugi, this midgetfucker won't die neither  
Yami's sprayin' him with speeches of teamwork  
We stomped the boy and then stomped his bitch again  
(America!) Domino bitch! Talk some shit again!  
Stomp him! (switch feet) Stomp him! (switch again!)  
Yami alright he's dead dog, quit kickin' him!  
I think Amelda jumped off the bridge again (Damn)  
He disappeared yo he's gone he did it again 

_Chorus_  
Dartz-i-bitch, oh Dartz-i-bitch  
Where for art thou Dartz-i-bitch?  
Please tell me what happened with  
Atlantis, yeah what happened with  
Dartz-i-bitch, oh Dartz-i-bitch  
Are you from America  
Japan or just a janitor  
From Domino? Oh Dartz-i-bitch


	66. Get My Gun

Hm... these are fun to write. Especially since I get reviews! (Hint, hint.) More than I thought, in fact. Every chapter has at least one review except for chapters 51, 52, 55, 57, 58, 62, 63, & 65. Maybe someone can fix that, hint hint. I'm not trying to insinuate someone should go back and review them at _all, _NO, NOT ME, _hint, HINT._

Yami  
I'm goin to get get my deck!

Yami: That duelist wants to disrespect me?  
Yugi: Yami, what the fuck you doing man?  
Yami: I got something for his deck.  
Yugi: Calm Down  
Yami: No YOU Calm Down!  
Yugi: Man. . what's you're problem?  
Yami: Fuck that! The motherfucker want's to pop shit to me?  
Yugi: What does that even mean?  
Yami: You know, he was poppin' them shit  
Yugi: What shit?  
Yami: That shit! You heard him!  
Yugi: He just asked to duel you!

Bakura  
A mad duelist packs trap cards to trap you further then you can get  
Man-Eater bug chews through bricks  
I play anything togetha, I done guillotine your monster  
Keep you seated, I play the cards that leave you beated  
I'll be severing souls, I'm in my host's nightmares  
A robber that can never ever be scared of the feds  
And the yami that'll fuck his friends  
Stab a hole in his hand  
Then have Ryou out in public, there's nothing that he can do  
Enough with his motherfucking cream puffs, he's soft  
Eat some real fast food, some greased-up food, ya hear prude?  
Crazier then all y'all, hurt you like the Pharaoh when I'm angry  
You'll never catch me hanging with his dumb friends  
All I have is hatred, seething evil  
The ring's gold points will stab through people  
When I see Yugi I'll beat you're beef stew  
Fuck being peaceful, my cards' in the vehicle and. . .

Chorus  
Yami  
I'M GOIN TO GET GET MY DECK!  
This fucking duelist says that I'm shit  
Nah fuck that I'll be right back  
I'M GOIN TO GET MY DECK!  
Nah motherfucker fuck you  
You ain't disrespecting me like that  
I'M GOIN TO GET MY DECK!  
Walk to the room, forty card kill  
Bitch how you fight that?  
I'M GOIN TO GET MY DECK!  
Bet you ain't know I'm the best  
Nice one, bitch this is my deck  
I'M GONNA GET MY DECK!

Malik  
I bring it to duelist looking as if they want trouble  
I send face down's flippin' around like a stunt double  
Forget about the fighting, squabbling, cheering, dueling  
I'm manically laughing, screaming, fooling  
Squat by the arena and scream "that mutt's bluffin'"  
I cut myself while sayin' "you can't win"  
I'm a lot less merciless than he knows  
Losers Marik and Mal' lettin' Yugi go  
I'll crush you like a bowl of Freetos  
'Cuz you keep glaring at me and playing cards strong as mosquitos  
You gotta aim a little higher if you wanna bet  
to lay the smack down on a duelist, with a god card in his deck  
I can ruin all ya combos into cardboard smolders  
A grimy old man will ogle Ryou in the hospital  
I'm hoggish, Joey is doggish, you bark tool  
My boat is right across the street fool and . . (I'M GONNA GET MY DECK!)

Kaiba  
My whole outfit lights up  
My deck beats you the fuck up  
You spout shit, and you're mutt clip  
Betta' watch the countless, buckles I wear  
Watch you holler when the holograms get under your skin  
I'm in love with the sin, tell Peggy I'm not gay  
When I get you back might kill your grandpa as well  
My monsters, got to him, paper cut on his chin  
Ain't going nowhere when I'm finished with him  
I'm a corporate icon, a mightful might bomb  
Get a hand full of cards when I beat your lights out  
With my lil' brother, wipe your life out  
Throw cards at your gun, somehow get you to run  
Fuck the tournament's, star, chips...(I'M GONNA GET MY...)  
Fuck that play bitch!  
Hit the duel talks, people all know me  
Ain't no problem, me being lonely

Chorus fades to background music  
Yami  
Dumbass duelists always gotta come to me with some dumb ideas!  
. . .Geez. . . I already told this duelist. .  
Wassup bitch? Duel this!. . .oh shit  
(I'M GOIN TO GET MY DECK!)

I'm trying to draw a card but they're stuck!...FUCK!  
My DuelDisk is all jammed up!...UGH!  
C'mon you cock-sucking, good-for-nothing, mother-fucking piece of shit, let go...AH!  
Yeah! Wattup bitch? Draw a card again!  
Played a combo shit, countered it, countered that it, beat his life points to the ground  
When dueling Seto I don't slack, drove him crazed  
Payback Kaiba, don't say that your better  
'Cause I'll kick your ass no matter what the weather  
And...(I'M GONNA GET MY DECK)  
And it's a shame I'm to drunk to even play  
Joey stepped in the way and I threw it at his leg  
Its like . . .

Yugi  
Play, Play, Play, bitch, Draw Draw Draw  
Everybody talking myths like they "Ra, Ra, Ra"  
But when you see me in arenas I be like wassup now?  
The bodyguard I step in trying to calm all them down (Chill out Joe)  
Screw that I got a bone to give to Joe  
You said it then have settle like some tall men shit  
Then me and you could talk about our problems couldn't we?  
Shoot the breeze and have handled this situation seriously  
I guess not, you just don't want to listen  
So I gotta preach with Joey and Tea and with Tristan  
Step in between us and get beat  
We won't separate under heat  
You ain't ready for this, Kaiba ain't nothing to play with!

Chorus

Pegasus  
Walk to KC for some holographic aid  
Its been one hour and Seto Kaiba still won't see me  
Wanna revive my wife, have family reunions  
It's been two hours and my fucking suit's ruined  
Hey "Tea" do you wanna get raped?  
Have Yugi come to my island and don't be late  
That's why I don't be us'ual duel rapping  
'Cuz everytime I lose, this is what the fuck happens (Funny Bunny laughing)  
Back to this interiview I was trying to get done  
Alister tried to get in front of me, I wouldn't let him  
I'm ready to sue this bitch's brains out  
I'm nervous, I farted, a rainbow came out  
Times up, shot her in her leg  
Got on my cell phone and called Croquet  
And all this feud shit I, don't get it. . .  
All because I wanted to see Mokuba nekkid


	67. Curtains Close

The dueling arena was fast becoming abandoned as the show was over. One person, however, still remained:

Joey Wheeler walked up on stage, and tapped the mic. "Is this thing on?

"Where'd everybody go?"

Receiving no response, still the boy decided to continue.

"Guess who's back?" he prompted. "Back again… Joe is back… tell some… men."

Joey scratched an itch behind his ear. Remembering previous taunts of him being doggish, he sang, "Pet my back, pet my back, pet my back, pet my back…

"Eh… wait. …Hello?"

Joey finally realized no one was paying attention to him. "Eh… Goodnight."


	68. Dude

**_Another skit! A D12 one. Technically, Eminem only has two lines in this skit… But whatever. This is, like, the prelude to "My Band". It's pretty funny, I thought I'd put it in here. The funniest part of adapting this was that Joey's character tends to say the word "dawg" a lot, and I changed it each time because Joey's already too "doggish". Heh._**

Yugi and Joey were walking around after coming in 2nd and 3rd place in a dueling tournament. Yami had, of course, won first.

"That shit was off the hook," Yugi said. Joey gave him a weird look. "That shit was hype ass hell," Yugi corrected, and Joey nodded approvingly.

"I'm 'bout to get on that bus, Yug'," Joey said, pointing to a bus, "to get some food. You wanna go to Yami's room and holla at him real quick."

"Hell yeah, man let's go ahead," Yugi said.

"He said he's gonna let us duel some more and shit," Joey said.

"I hope so," Yugi said, "'cause them 2 duels ain't workin."

"Wassup dawg?" Joey greeted a security guard.

"Lil' Mokie baby, 'sup Tristan," greeted Kimo.

"Tea? I'm Yugi."

"Aye you'se, I'm not Tris', I'm Joey dude."

Kimo shrugged. "Was goin' on?" he asked.

Yugi pointed to the door. "I need to holla at my man about some dueling time," he explained.

Kimo shook his head. "Well he's in there trying to unwind right now," he explained, placing his hands on Yugi's shoulders.

"Aiyo," Yugi said, "why you gotta put your hands on me. What you say?"

"Tryin' to unwind?" Joey asked.

"Yeah," Kimo said, "you know, relax… you know what I'm saying."

"Kimo we trying to get some food and shit," Yugi said angrily.

"There's some steak up in there Yug'," Joey said, able to smell steak from behind Yami's door.

Kimo pointed down the hall. "Your dressing room's right around the corner, right there by the bathroom…"

Yugi pouted. "Dude, we know."

Joey glared at Kimo. "You tryin' to be funny dude? We're a group, we're all together, man. Why don't you go holla at him, and tell him we're out here and then see… Tell him Joey Wheeler is out here." Realizing that Yami would probably rather see Yugi, he added, "And Yugi please." And, still, he added, through clenched teeth, "you thick ass mutherfucker."

Kimo sighed. He poked his head inside the door. "Hey, Yami!"

Yami's incredulous voice came hollering back. "What dude?"

"I got Joey and… what's your name again, kid?"

"Man fuck you!" Yugi spat. "Hey Yami come to the fucking door man, why you got this idiot blockin' the wind and shit. Hey Yami wassup man!"

Inside, Yami rolled his eyes. "Dude, tell 'em I'm getting a massage, dude."


	69. Rock City

(Mokuba)  
Domino  
City  
Re  
be  
ca  
Mokuba  
Kaiba  
Come on!

(Rebecca)  
Can't stop the duelists,  
My great boyfriend, rocks the arena  
Nine turns'll finish, away we send you  
Fuck You

(Mokuba)  
Fuck You!!

(Rebecca)  
I am not the best queen  
these japs don't know me

(Mokuba)   
come on

(Rebecca)  
Yugi's my king, Tea, bow  
Domino City's where Yugi eats sleeps, and balls  
Goth clothes in cars, steals clothes in malls

(Mokuba)  
As long as your city's got the games  
then your city's title isn't yours  
Then your cities got the...

(Rebecca)  
Mai's saggin, lookin like she got four arms  
White milk, wine bottle, 4Kids is doom (A/N: 4Kids actually edits it where Mai is drinking a milk from a wine glass)  
Tea get popped, for sellin burgers and shakes  
If you love Yugi, you hate the 'T', girl please  
I'm wearin' black takin him back from the sap  
Think I'm lyin', watch him, where's he at?

(Mokuba)  
Domino City, (play, come on)  
Come on and play with me  
Domino City, (play, come on)  
Come on and play with me  
Domino City, (play, come on)  
Come on and play with me  
Play with me, (play)  
Come on and play with me  
Domino City  
Come play some games with me  
Domino City  
And come and play with me  
Domino City, Come on  
Domi, (no) City... COME ON!  
da da da da da

(Rebecca)  
Duelists and islanders hussle together  
Long as there's dueling involved, duelists'll tussle together  
Long as the duel's, a duel, the shadows is shadows  
Souls is souls, man and we stealing if the owner lose  
So, draw your cards, everything's real fair  
from Yugi to Pharaoh, we have notin' to hide  
You can't say we can't win,

(Mokuba)  
What

(Rebecca)  
Either we're in shadow gmaes, or there's some souls that the thief wants, what!  
Yugi Motoh, is bout it  
You can just ask any one of your losers that duel about it  
That Tea Gardner, know how'ta stop shit  
She'll talk until you sleep, plus promote friendship  
Plus she'll laud the Pharaoh when he isn't slick  
And she'll keep a sugar Yugi that'll buy her some shit (come on)

(Mokuba)  
Domino City, (play, come on)  
Come on and play with me  
Domino City, (play, come on)  
Come on and play with me  
Domino City, (play, come on)  
Come on and play with me  
Play with me, (play)  
Come on and play with me  
Domino City  
Come play some games with me  
Domino City  
And come and play with me  
Domino City, Come on  
Domi, (no) City... COME ON!  
da da da da da

The city with the cards,  
with the most friendship speeches are produced,  
here we are, we've been...

(Rebecca)  
In the arenas, card shuffling, some souls's to bet  
Disrespect, and get a paper cup under you neck  
A city full of thug ass duelists and punk rockers  
A lot of duelists hate Kaiba, so guards watch 'em  
Game shop blocks up, Yugi's the best in Japan  
Some boys look, act and talk like him

(Yami)  
(Hi!)

(Rebecca)  
Fight music, night fuses, never respect it,  
Cards talk, high schools with evil teachers  
A city full of Seto Kaiba haters  
Joe Wheeler blunders, Tristan hairdos, stunning  
Duelists with cards, combos like whoa!  
Dueldisks, no need for sit down play  
Kaibacorp they got dough, they like so  
real then you might go (where?)

(Mokuba)  
Domino City, (play, come on)  
Come on and play with me  
Domino City, (play, come on)  
Come on and play with me  
Domino City, (play, come on)  
Come on and play with me  
Domino with me, (play)  
Come on and play with me  
Domino City  
Come play some games with me  
Domino City  
And come and play with me  
Domino City, (play, come on)  
Come on and play with me  
Domino City, (play, come on)  
Come on and play with me  
Domino City, (play, come on)  
Come on and play with me  
Play with me, (play)  
Come on and play with me  
Domino City  
Come play some games with me  
Domino City  
And come and play with me

(Rebecca)  
Yugi's Domino City

(Mokuba)

Mokuba Kaiba

(Rebecca)  
Won't you he go on dates with me?

(Mokuba)   
Rebecca

(Rebecca)  
Maybe he'll play a game with me

(Mokuba)  
Rebecca Chambers

(Rebecca)  
It's Hawkins

(Mokuba)  
Domino City

(Rebecca)  
Tea's so gross, ugh

(Mokuba)  
Domino

(Rebecca)  
Yugi's mine, uh-huh

(Mokuba)  
Domino City

(Rebecca)  
Won't you come and play with us?

(Mokuba)  
Domino City

(Rebecca)  
Won't you come and play with us?

(Mokuba)   
Play with me

(Rebecca)  
Won't you come and play with us?

(Mokuba)  
Play with, with, with..

(Rebecca)  
Yugi Motoh  
Don't touch him

(Mokuba)  
Gross...


	70. Wanksta

Intro - Kaiba  
Yeah it's Kaiba  
a.k.a. moneybags  
Kaiba Corp yo   
buy my stuff  
I do a lot of toys  
to sell before I die  
but I ain't got employees with brains  
so I make em

Verso 1 - Kaiba  
I ain't no amateur  
I ain gotta start frontin  
I just call the bank up  
if I need some hot money

I've an enemy of late  
named the Pharaoh I hate  
this feud's official now  
duels are rigorous like wow  
wipe out his life points how  
Useless are these nicks and dimes  
I spent so much time  
on Kaibaland and Death-T  
its like a gold mine  
but Yugi's still alive  
he bounce right back  
he gotta be a spirit revived  
this shit must be a sign,  
Yugi's friends   
must be blind  
"The Pharaph?" I know they must  
be fuckin with my mind  
they know they bout to cry  
cause I hate teams but I  
know how to get the top  
cause Go' gave me  
a business mind  
I make all the rules  
In tournaments I rule  
I run a company but still  
have time to duel

Ritornello x 2 - Kaiba  
I ain't no amateur  
I ain gotta start frontin  
I just call the bank up  
if I need some hot money  
but you gonna eat your words  
your life points gonna drop, buddy  
single you out a long time  
you gonna get stomped stuntin

Verso 2 - Kaiba  
Damn Yugi  
this shit's about to hit the fan Yugi  
what the hell is wrong with Joe  
he got the weirdest vendetta  
he must think that you're betta  
than me he ought to know betta   
you fittin to give him some chedda  
now Joey think I gonna let 'em  
take my copter home forget 'em  
if he barks then I might let 'em  
let Roland stomp  
his head in it's all good  
cause I'd rather against Yugi  
small fry plays me  
don't know how he beat me  
so tell 'em he better be easy  
start some bullshit   
with some loser duelists  
Rex Raptor, Mako, Bandit Keith, and Pegasus  
Yo Weevil's no good 'cause  
he's always bugged out   
you won't see no card that  
ain't totally bugged out 

Ritornello x 2 - Kaiba

Outro - Kaiba  
Damn Yugi – Kaiba Corporation  
Mokuba – Roland - Seto

KaibaCorp – Duel-dizzy  
a.k.a. Moneybags


	71. I'm Back

Short note: I really like this song. :) One of my faves. I actually have this one on CD… And reading back over this chapter, I thought I did it pretty well at adapting it. Do you agree? Review and tell me…:) My favorite line in this chapter is the part about Pegasus on the Internet.

CHORUS 4X:  
That's why they call me Bakura  
(I'm Back) I'm Back, (I'm Back) I'm Back 

Verse 1  
I murder a priest, prince, even a guard  
You never, heard of someone so great, beating me's hard  
You better, give me that puzzle, it ain't gonna help  
What good's it gonna do against a man that'll stab himself?  
I'm want to maul the damn Pharaoh with claws like a bear  
Marik, you're safe in the shadows, be thankful you're there  
My host was his mommy's little cute angel at twelve  
At thirteen I was puttin shells in a gauge on his shelf  
Ryou used to, get punched and bullied at his school   
Til I cut a puppy's head off and stuck it in this kid's mail box   
("Mom! MOM!") I used to give a, fuck, now I could give a fuck less  
What do I think of Pharaoh? He sucks his mind's too narrow  
I want to harrow him, stick his hair through with an arrow  
I guess he must just blew up quick, yes  
Grew up quick, no, was raised right, whatever he say's wrong  
And all that I say's fight  
You think of snowfall now whenever you say hi  
I used to be tan but my host's so W H I  
T E, and Yugi was so friendly to me, can't wait till Pharaoh sees me  
Now is it worth it? Look at my plan isn't it perfect?  
Ryou, agree, what, your mouth isn't workin?  
Oh now I get it, I'm in control now  
You can't get a word a word in edgewise starting right now

CHORUS 4X

Verse 2  
Marik takes each individual dumb duelists' head and reach into it  
Just to see if he's influenced by darkness and he'll listen to him  
And if he feeds into darkness he's an innocent victim  
And becomes a puppet on behalf of the Mil'len rod vocal scratches  
But my name is Bakura, I been crazy way before the Pharaoh slayed me  
Out the Shadow Realm, "Back and still incredible!"  
With Pegasus who just finds young men edible  
It's Pegasus, on the internet  
Trying to, lure your kids, wit him into bed  
It's a, sick world we live with these days   
Peg for Ra's sakes stop touching Mokuba's legs!  
Sheez you guys are so sensitive  
Peg it's real gross subject try and just don't mention it  
Mind with no sense in it, Mokie was an instrument  
Tried to steal his body, Tristan knocked me down, shit   
I did save his life though, he's going to owe me, make his friends all adore me  
Okay that won't happen with Yugi Motoh out to get me  
But that's where I get my name from, that's why they call me

CHORUS 4X

Verse 3  
I take seven friends from Ryou's class stand 'em all in line  
And play some dark shadow games that fuck up their dumb minds  
This Millennium item always solves all problems of mine  
A natural Marik Ishtar would duel 'em all at one time  
I'm Bakura, they call me as crazy  
As Kaiba was over this whole 'Peggy's gay' thing  
By the way, Johnny Steps why does he dance  
Am I the only one who realizes he can't?  
Should I care what you think? I'm tryin' to tan   
Kill someone's grandma and then go on the lam?  
It's why I tend to block out my yadonushi  
All his damn whinin' makes me crave death by sushi  
So I just, throw up a mental bar'ier and keep it on high  
Longer than the rumor that I was making out with Mai  
Cuz if I ever made out with any duelist then geez, dude  
It'd be Malik's sister Ishizu, and other rumors are just rude  
I'm sorry Malik, but I don't give a fuck if hurting the other me  
was the only way to get Yami to lose to me  
I had to keep him alive to use his body  
I'll just say that I ain't care, what's my name? 

CHORUS 4X

Guess who's back (back)  
geh- geh- guess who's back  
Hi Ryou  
Guess who's back  
geh- geh- guess who's back (vocal scratches)  
Marik  
Guess who's back  
geh- geh- geh- geh- guess who's back  
Yami's dead (scratches)  
Guess who's back, back, back (scratches), back  
Bakura  
1000 AD  
I'm blew out from this tomb  
(sighs) fuck

_**Please leave a short review! I'm off to camp on Saturday, but I'll update when I get back if I've got a review!**_


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